Eyes-chapter 5

“Kanako,” Dulcy stepped towards me; her dark hair winding around her face, the light on the gate twisting her shadow against the stones of the manor.1

I closed my eyes, praying myself to still be upstairs sleeping. Maybe this was just an elaborate dream. The rocks crunched under Dulcy’s feet as she walked towards me; the world began to spin and a headache formed, pain throbbing behind my eyes.2

Dulcy stopped and I squeezed my eyes tighter, not daring to meet hers. “You forgot something.”3

I opened my eyes as she slipped cold plastic onto my face, the darkness around me seemed a shade darker and shadows seemed to meld with the grass and house they were scattered upon. I brushed a hand along the side of the lens, “but.”4

Dulcy pressed a finger against my mouth and shushed me, “you’re very beautiful. You know that?”5

I shook my head and wrapped my arms around Dulcy, tears rolling down my cheeks. The throbbing in my head faded as her warmth pushed away the cold of the night air. “I’m so happy.”6

Dulcy pulled away from me and opened the passenger’s seat. I blushed slightly wondering why I hadn’t realized the door had been unlocked to begin with and lowered myself onto the comfortable leather seats, setting my bag in my lap.7

Dulcy shut the door and hurried to the driver’s seat, and started the car. I stared at my house, as the headlights beamed over the grey rocky sides. My parent’s bedroom window was covered with white drapes, and I felt an emptiness fill the pit of my stomach. Adrenaline flowed through my body, filling every nerve and muscle with an energy and spreading my fear and nervousness.8

The gate opened as Dulcy’s car neared and I got a view of a world I had never before seen. Darkened green trees bordered a dirt road and the grass outside the garden seemed to lack the amount of care it needed. Patches of brown showed through the olive green grass, while in other areas it grew several feet high.9

I covered my mouth as the car pressed forward, feeling slightly queasy. I had never before been in a car, let alone be driven in one. The world around seemed to blur slightly and I closed my eyes, not used to this speed.10

We were silent for a while, and the feeling gradually grew worse, I glanced at Dulcy who seemed focused on the road in front of her and all the meters behind the steering wheel, which were covered in a glass casing.11

“Are you alright?”12

I shook my head and leaned forward, my bag pressing into my stomach. I didn’t dare open my mouth to respond, fearing an acidy flavor.13

“Can you hand me my purse?”14

I turned around and peered into the backseat, a black bag I assumed to be her purse was settled next to the red luggage I had seen her come with. Trying not to think about anything other than the bag, I grabbed a strap and pulled it towards me, surprised at its weight.15

“There should be some pills for motion-sickness in the purple container in one of the side pockets.”16

I nodded, but had to squint against the darkness and still had trouble recognizing colors. Finally by chance I found a container that appeared purple; on popping it open I found some small oval-shaped tablets. I popped one in my mouth, scrunching up my face at the foul flavor and forced myself to swallow.17

“Stare at the horizon,” Dulcy added. “That should help too.”18

I looked out into the distance, the queasy sensation gone and replaced by my unease. I glanced at the clock in my pocket, it read 11:50, and with luck my disappearance wouldn’t be noticed till at least 6. “Where are we going?”19

Dulcy shrugged, “Dunno, but it’s pretty late; you can go to sleep for a bit if you want.”20

“Aren’t they going to know I’m with you when they find out were both gone?”21

Dulcy laughed, “Probably, but I’m not worried.” Her face darkened, “if anything happens, I’ll take the blame.” Her face lightened again, “I’d bet they’d believe me if I said I kidnapped you.”22

“But you didn’t!” I shouted, and then we were both silent. I looked out the window and leaned back; my anger seeming to have returned my weariness. I took one last glance at Dulcy and closed my eyes, drifting gently off to sleep with the gently rocking of the vehicle.23

I dreamed little, and occasionally awoke when we passed over bumps in the road. Silence filtered through the air, sometimes I glanced to make sure Dulcy was still there.24

At around 5 light began to peak over the horizon, providing a colorful projection of pink, red, and yellow hues. I sat up and yawned, stretching my arms; Dulcy pulled us into a gas station and turned off the car.25

“You hungry?” Dulcy opened the door and looked back at me.26

I nodded, “where are we?”27

Dulcy shrugged, “were about 250 miles from where we started I suppose.” She backed away, “I’ll ask them in there.”28

The door slammed and my eyes trailed her into the glass door of the gas-station shut completely. After a few steady breaths I grabbed the purple container from her purse and placed in my pocket. I opened the car door and slid out, my stomach growled slightly as I shut the door but I only swallowed. I’d take starvation over getting Dulcy in trouble.29

“Goodbye,” I mumbled and took off running, ignoring the pounding slap of the clock and glass hitting my legs, alternating with ever stride. After a small distance I stopped and tried to catch my breath, not used to running a distance.30

An engine roared as a few cars passed, I turned away from the road and covered my face, if anyone recognized me this escape would barely last another hour. I hurried behind an old café and bookstore and pulled off my sunglasses a moment and rubbed my eyes, before returning the lenses. I looked around, wondering how far I’d gone from the gas-station. It had felt like a good distance, but wasn’t sure how good my judgment was.31

I heard a car stop, and my body tensed; this whole plan had been a mistake. With quick steps I slung my bag over my shoulder and took off down the street, desperate to get back to Dulcy and the safety of her vehicle.32

After several minutes it was obvious I was lost, the buildings seemed not the least bit familiar, and Dulcy would have left by now. I sat on the curb with my face buried in my hands; the adrenaline was beginning to wear off and now the looming size and foreign shape of all the buildings beginning to register in my mind. I didn’t belong here, and it wouldn’t be long before I was returned to my home and locked in some windowless room with only Nana to see me.33

I lifted my head up and gazed out at the building across the street, a group of six people about my age sat on a bench in front of a convenience store. One of them met my eyes and suddenly I felt stuck in the spotlight as twelve eyes became focused on me.34

The world was silent except for the occasional passing car and there was an odd roar in the distance. I looked down at my hands, the flesh on my arm seeming only paler in the light of the day. This was my first day out of my house, and if it was certain I would be found I needed a way to commemorate any bit of time spent in freedom.35

My hands tightened into fists and I grabbed the glass shard from my pants, momentarily forgetting to be discrete, and swung my arm down making a large hatch-mark like wound. “First day,” I whispered as blood began to roll down my arm and splattered in odd shapes on the white concrete beneath me.36

“Hey!” One of the boys was running over to me and he grabbed the glass from my hand. I looked up and found myself staring into the hazel eyes of some boy not much older than myself. “What the hell are you doing?” He shouted tossing the glass onto the street.37

My eyes trailed its decent; the glass shattering on impact. The boy glared at me expectantly, but I remained silent; somewhat shocked by this person’s behavior. The rest of the boy’s group hurried over; glancing momentarily at the shattered remains on the street as they passed.38

“That was mine,” I mumbled finally, avoiding their eyes. The air around me felt electric; pain pulsed behind my eyes and the world around me felt fuzzy and out of focus. I stood and my body shaking as the blood dripped from the tips of my fingers. I squeezed my hands into fists, “I needed that!”39

A few flinched at my tone and backed away. My eyes quickly rested on the hazel-eyed boy in front of me; every nerve in my body reeled with irritation. I closed my eyes for a moment, but the headache only grew more intense, destroying ever bit of sense I had.40

I twitched slightly and jerked open my eyes. The air stung at my flesh as I tackled the boy to the ground, his head slapped against the concrete street and his seemed frozen in shock. I took the moment of surprise to grab a chunk of glass that had been flung near, gripping his arm tightly, and my nails dug deeply into his flesh.41

“That was mine,” my voice rung out, barely more than a whisper but certainly audible. I squeezed the glass tighter in my hand and swung it down, aiming for the boy’s neck.42

The moment of stun ended before the glass connected with his flesh; the group grabbed me and wrestled me to the ground. I thrashed and violently swung the glass at them, trying to fend them off, but only to have my arms twisted painfully away and held to the floor. Tears brimming my eyes and I began screaming in anguish; they had destroyed it.43

I crumpled, losing my grip on the glass and squeezing my eyes shut; sometime during the battle I had lost my sunglasses and didn’t dare let them see me as any more of a freak. Tears rolled down my face, leaving wet streaks on my cheeks. “You broke it,” I whimpered, my voice having lost its previous vigor.44

I heard footsteps and then silence, my perception suddenly nil; never before had I realized how much I relied on my sight. Feeling as though I had been thrown into a deep pit of emptiness I twitched and slowly opened my eyes.45

I blinked several times before completely adjusting to the brightness of the sun, everything seeming blurred. The newly broken clock in my pocket wasn’t working, its hands remained frozen in the position they had attained at the time of its demise. 7:00 exactly, I set the clock down and found my sunglasses lying at an odd angle on the concrete. They weren’t broken and I quickly placed them over my eyes, happy at the immediate relief. But my comfort was short lasted as I came to find my bag to be gone.46

I stood shakily and dusted off my pants, I was now left with nothing more than my sunglasses and the clothes I currently wore. The world seemed hazy and uninviting, my body tensing at the realization that I had caused this. If I hadn’t attacked the boy, or cut myself, or even left Dulcy’s car to begin with; heck I should have never even stepped out of the house, or tried to drown myself, or dig my nails into my flesh and start this awful obsession with my own discomfort.