To Remember~

My body fell into bed, sending ripples of motion across the sheets. I pressed my face against the pillow and sighed. What was I to do? What had I to do? Rolling off the pillow and onto my back I stared at the dark ceiling. "I remember a time when, that's your assignment, so be it." That's what the teacher had said, and that was what i didn't have. "Tomorrow" The voice echoed in my head. Tomorrow. The due date, and tomorrow was just to near. I lifted my head and looked out the window and just saw a wall of blackness. What memory had I that was worthy of a story? Each idea that found it's way into my head was silently dismissed for not being exciting enough, or funny enough, or lacking inspiration. I had nothing worthy. Nothing. I tilted my head to my door and was offered a clear view into the living room. The Christmas tree, clad in multicolored bulbs, shown in all it's glory, casting the shadows of the furniture onto the wooden floor. The fire crackled merrily in our wood stove, so anything that found itself near it would be bathed in a warm orange glow. I heard the filters of the fish tank in the distance, bubbling away without a care in the world. The clock near it giving away it's steady ticks to the nighttime melody. 1

I closed my eyes as my ears wove their way through the orchrastra of sounds and found themselves complementing the steady, unhurried bubble of the fish tank. My body grew limp as sleep took hold of me. perhaps I could think of something tomorrow, yes, i could trust my mind to do that, that of all things i could do. And yet a tiny hint of doubt broke out of the back of my head and wove it's way into my consciousness. "What if you can't think of something?" My breath stopped. "what if you fail?"2

My breathing grew rapid and my eyes opened into the night. The night, who was once my friend offering bed and comfort was but now an enemy, bringing tomorrow. I had to think of something, of salvation. I knew there was a story somewhere hidden in the depths of my mind. I felt my eyes grow heavy, yawning I closed my eyes again and found the relaxing bubble of the fish tank. But What if I couldn't? This solitary thought kept me from failing in the welcoming darkness of sleep. I had to think of something, I had to. And yet my mind's normal, unbroken flow of ideas had ceased. There was nothing. Exhaustion took hold of me. I must sleep, but I couldn't. I had failed. I couldn't remember a time when. That was the problem, That was what was stopping me. I couldn't remember a time when. And so it broke me. I was thinking through it wrong, I should make my greatest obstacle be my success. I had my answer was my final thought as sleep took it's final hold on me, dragging me into his realm. I now remember a time when; a time when i couldn't remember a time when.