“Hi,” she said.2
Ian looked up, he knew this would be easy she had come to him he just had to make it work from there.3
“Hi.” he replied.4
“My names Caroline.” She said holding out her hand.5
“Ian.”6
“So why are you sitting all alone? Would you like some company?” Caroline asked.7
“Sure sit down.” Ian said gesturing to the chair.8
“So are you enjoying the party?” Caroline asked. 9
Ian nodded, this wasn’t one of the best parties he’d been too, but it was ok. 10
“What do you do for a living?” he asked her.11
Ian stared at her while she talked. Her skin looked soft and delicate under the sun; she wore a loose fitting blue tank top and a black skirt. Her lips moved quickly and her eyes glowed as she was talking. 12
“…so what do you do for a living?” She asked,13
“I’m a business man; I travel from place to place. I’m here just for a while. So I thought I would come a say hello to old friends.”14
“Oh that’s nice.” 15
Ian could tell she wasn’t interested and that suited him fine, he didn’t need her prying into his lie.16
“It’s really hot here,” Caroline said “Would you like to go inside?”17
Ian nodded; she was making this easy for him. When they got inside Caroline chose to sit in one of the quieter rooms. They sat talking about various things, as they talked Ian couldn’t stop looking at her. Her lips looked so soft, and her flesh looked just as soft. The conversation soon trailed off into silence. 18
“Can I kiss you?” Ian asked. 19
Caroline nodded. The sound of his deep voice penetrated through her; of course he could kiss her. She’d been watching him for a long time at the party. He had been alone throughout the party and he sat there looking round. He had a lovely smile and handsome looks, yet there was something mysterious about him in his eyes. She wrapped her hands around him as he kissed her, she could feel his lips and she longed for more.20
As Ian kissed her he felt her skin with his hands, soft and delicate just as he predicted. Her lips were soft and had a faint taste of cherry. Ian slipped his hand inside her top feeling her hot skin even more.21
They both parted from their kiss to catch some air and talked more. Ian could tell she was smitten. They talked till the end of night and when they parted Caroline gave him her number. Ian could tell she was smitten, after their kiss she had a dreamy look in her eyes; he had her right where he wanted her.22
*23
It was several days before Ian called Caroline. He had arranged for her to come to his house. She arrived exactly at 5pm. They sat down to dinner and engaged in their mindless conversation. Ian still found is gaze wondering to her skin so delicate and soft. After dinner Ian let Caroline explore his house while he tidied up. Ian watched her leave and sipped his wine. If she followed his plan everything would go correctly. 24
Caroline wondered into the room and put on the light. A chill ran down her spine as the light went on, the light was dim and she could barley see. The wall was painted a deep blood red. There were dozens of shelf each with a jar on it. Caroline walked further to take a closer look. Each shelf had a label and as Caroline looked at each item closely she was horrified at what she saw. Each jar contained a body part, labelled ears, toes, fingers, and nose. She felt her stomach churning, what was this? On the top shelves lay the instruments of mass destruction. There were knifes, blades, saws, hooks and everything else. The instruments were now black from the blood that had been on them. Each instrument glinted under the light. She walked further along deeper into the room. Pictures of massacred bodies where plastered across the wall. Pictures of bloodied faces and deep wounds, screamed at her. Caroline couldn’t take this anymore, her body was shaking and her legs where going to give way any moment. As Caroline turned around she came face to face with a young girl dead body. Her face gaunt and her body pale. Her mouth was wide open and her arm was gone. Caroline opened her mouth to scream but nothing came out. She had to get out of here. She ran towards the exit and felt something grab her.25
“Going somewhere Caroline?” a menacing voice asked.26
The figure swung her around until she could see them. It was Ian.27
“W-w-what’s going on? What is all of this?” Caroline asked,28
“You like it? Or are you scared?” Ian asked keeping his eyes on her.29
“What is all of this?” Caroline asked again.30
“It’s what you get for snooping around.” Ian said angrily.31
“I-I-I didn’t I was just looking around. Let me go! Get me out of here. This is disgusting!” Caroline screamed.32
“Beg and plead all you want your not going anywhere.” Ian said.33
Out of the corner of her eye Caroline saw something glint in Ian’s hand.34
“W-w-what are you doing with that?” Caroline asked.35
“Didn’t you see the pictures? You’re going to end up just like them, but maybe I’ll make your death sweeter. What shall I eat first? See I could chop you up and eat your liver, you like liver don’t you?” Ian asked laughing.36
Caroline felt sick, liver, that’s what they had for dinner.37
“Yes, a young girl’s liver you ate, nice wasn’t it? How about the wine you drank? A blood red colour wasn’t it?” Caroline’s stomach started to churn. This was sick. “You think cannibals are disgusting? Well take a look at yourself, you just ate a poor little girl and you liked it. But however it’s time for you to die now.”38
“No, no! please let me go.” Caroline pleaded. 39
Ian brought the knife to her face and made a deep gash on her cheek. Caroline shouted out in pain. The blood spilled out and Ian began to suck her cheek. Caroline whimpered at his touch. His hands that were once so tender were grasping her arms and hurting her. His eyes which were once so mysterious flashed anger.40
Ian lapped up the last bit of the blood and kissed Caroline, passing the blood into her mouth. Caroline protested and tried to close her mouth.41
“Drink it,” Ian commanded, slapping his hand over her mouth “Drink all of it.”42
Caroline did as she was told, as soon as it went down she retched it back up again.43
“You fool!” Ian spat and grabbed her by the neck. He made another gash, this time in her arm. Caroline’s screams echoed through the room. Ian watched the blood dripping from her arm, and dipped his finger in it. Caroline’s screams had died down now and she was whimpering. Using his index finger Ian marked the blood on her face. 44
“Still turned on?” Ian asked flicking his tongue at her. Caroline turned away. She could feel Ian’s eyes burning into her. How could he do this to people? To her? He had been so seductive and mysterious, that the thought never occurred to her. Suddenly she felt a sharp pain in her hand. Ian was slicing her skin! She screamed out in pain.45
She looked down at her hand and saw that Ian was cutting off her skin, slicing deeper and further.46
“Stop please,” Caroline managed.47
Ian ignored her. He made a fresh cut and ripped off the rest off the skin. Caroline let out a blood curling scream and began to cry. Ian brought the flesh to her face and smothered the blood on her cheek and bit on her flesh. 48
Caroline watched as he devoured her skin, what possessed people to do this? Caroline felt another sharp pain, this time in her leg. But Ian was using a knife any more he was using an axe and hacking away at her leg. The rooms echoed Caroline’s screams and cries. 49
“Shut up!” Ian hissed. Her screams were ringing in his ears.50
But Caroline kept on screaming. Ian sighed he’d never have her leg off if she didn’t shut up. Why couldn’t she just shut up?51
Ian grabbed the knife and grabbed her face and kissed her on the lips. Caroline protested and Ian bit her tongue, her blood went straight into his mouth and he swallowed it. 52
“Nice knowing you.” He said and stabbed the knife straight into her throat. She died instantly and her body fell into his arms. Ian laid her on the floor working quickly. He chopped her leg off and her other limbs and wrapped them in a plastic bag. He removed her organs, including her liver, and placed them into a plastic bag. Ian looked along his rack of instruments and picked up the barb wire. Pity he thought he could have used that to torture her as well. He lined the bags with barbed wire and grabbed what was left of her body and placed it in a black bag.53
The floor was stained with her blood, and Ian got down on his knees and dipped his fingers in it, it was still fresh.54
Ian got up and left to take a bath.55
*56
Several hours later Ian was in the park. He had disposed of Caroline’s body in one of the unused ponds in the park. Her body wouldn’t be found for years and when it was most of her would be missing. Ian took a sip of his own special drink. 57
“All alone?” someone asked.58
Ian looked up. Her eyes were a glittering blue and her hair was a golden blonde. Perfect.59
“Yes, would you like to join me?”60
Author notes
#16 This is my first time doing a story like this, if it’s not graphic enough for you it is for me! Erm I don’t think the title it perfect for my story so any suggestions? The end is a bit unoriginal but it’s the only was I would think to end it. What do you think?
Enter the Darkness - another contest entry.
Tears of diamonds and a Wilted Rose - another contest
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
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Lol, I think the evidence was pretty obvious. Thanks you for the title selections, they are excellent. I will check out your story too. Lol and I'm sure I could handle it.
Thanks again!
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Oh and if you are into this kind of thing please check out my story "I Am A Victim Of The World"... It'll be on my authors page listed there... It's pretty gory... lol. But i'm sure a pretty young girl like you could handle it... hah ahahahahahahahahahahaha
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No, no... It's descriptive enough... lol. It reminds me of this episode of FBI files. These woman were being killed and put in plastic bags and in bins and the police got some kind of lead to this factory. The manager (let's call him Andrew Flicks) owned the place. The police asked to go visit his apartment which was attached to the sight and when they entered it was disgusting. The walls were blood red and there was like sodomistic equiptment and sexual torture stuff... It was disgusting then it said on the programme, "We didn't have enough evidence."
Haha I wouldn't need any more after that. I just think hello you stupid criminal. Atleast if your gonna kill someone don't make it like so obvious it's unbelieveable.
The story was really well wrote though, you should be published!!
Looking for a title? What about one of these:
1. Seduced into Sodomy
2. The Killer Instinct
3. I Like Young Blondes
LoL... I'm not very good at titles either. Anyway, all the best and good luck,
Stef
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lol, thank you.
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holy shit, this story is awesome, creepy and awesome!
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Lol, thank you very much!
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Holy crap, this was really good! Pretty sick, but nonetheless really good. It just shows how people can really not be what they seem. The part about the cannibalism was completly disturbing! In a good way though. The ending was fine. Yes, it has been done before, but it's still a classic. It leaves you wondering what really happened. You wrote this perfectly through a killer's eyes. Excellent job, keep writing.
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Thank you and thank you for all the correction too!
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There were dozens of shelf each with a jar on it.---Sorry, grammar freak is out, I believe shelf should be shelves.
Caroline let out a blood curling scream and began to cry.---I believe curling should be curdling.
The rooms echoed Caroline’s screams and cries.---I believe rooms should be room.
Good job with the torture, very nicely done with that aspect. The mental thrill was good too. It was a little repetitive at parts, but overall it was an extremely good plot. I shall applaud. Good luck
~Zave -
Great job!
<3
Ems -
Awww thank you!
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Lol thank for noticing the error. And I'm glad you liked it.
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Im still laughing, that was HIGHLY amusing! One thing though ;
"But Ian was using a knife any more" - I think you mean Ian WASN'T using a knife anymore.
Reminds of something ive seen/heard/read...or perhaps my mind is just so sick i think of things like this all by myself.
Nice though, good luck in the contest! -
perfect... you have some potential to be a great writer... i love the imagry and detail... it was perfect....
good luck in my contest!
<3
Ems -
omg, that was fucking awesome ... I love serial killer stories and it's kinda hard to put original twists on them, but you managed that perfectly. Expertly written, amazing piece. I absolutly loved it.
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Lol, thank you. I'm talented! Wow, thankx alot.
Yea it's is sick but, I like it but If I put anymore I'd have gone too far.
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my god i am scared for life...you are really talented...especially for a 14 tear old..wow..im impressed. And I am glad to see omeone on AP has a sick mind to match my own..great job
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No way, I'm not a cannibal - I'd be sick if I was! Thanx anway
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Woah... That... was so sick and twisted it was .... I am trying to find the right words but... yeah. It was really good and I must say I enjoyed it... Very graphic and um... you arent a cannibal are you? lol- Anyway it was a great write. Keep it up!
*Runs away quickly*
-Ash
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wow. very good job indeed. i really liked this, very creepy indeed. i did not see the cannibal part coming. i knew ian was bad but not a cannibal... thanks so much for all your entries, i have enjoyed them all. no, it was quite graphic enough thanks, i think you did the perfect amount- you got your point without making it too sickening. good luck in my contest! Jinx
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yep one to tell the kids on halloween, i'd be serioulsy freeked! But glad u like it.
Edited on Aug 03, 1:47 p.m. because '...'. -
Wow thanx! ten whole good things about my story!!!! Oh and i'm 14. Thank you very much you are so kind
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wow...this would be a good story to tell little kids on halloween...or just for fun at a party...nice job. >complement<
Edited on Jul 29, 9:46 p.m. because ''. -
Amazing
Wow. Alright here are the good things.
1. Good Dialogue
2. The ending was good.
3. The plot was outstanding
4. It was interesting the whole time
5. The drama never stopped
6. Nice details
7. The description helped me see the story
8. The story was very clever
9. I don't know how old you are, but nice vocabulary
10. I am gonna give you an applaud
Now there was only one bad thing:
1. The story ended -lol
BTW my name is Tyler. My name on this site is slidetackelintyler just so ya know. Good Job with the writing, this definetly was worth reading!




