Lost Love

“Running, tired, loosing my breath, I can’t turn around; being chased by monster that we people call men. These aren’t men they’re demons. Lord help me! “Annie Run!” I heard David yell as I was already running. Then the last thing I heard was BANG!” I told Officer Brady.1

“It’s ok dear. I understand. Can you describe the men who shot the gun?” the officer asked.2

“Their faces were covered but they were about 5ft tall a piece. One very big around the middle and one who was so skinny he appeared anorexic.” I said, “WE have to go back for David! He could still be alive! He could have got them.”3

“Dear Officer Reynolds went there and they declared him dead.” He said offering me a rose and a box of tissues, “We apologize for your loss, but we will find this guy.”4

“He can’t be dead! It’s not fair!” I yelled sobbing from my loss. 5

“A loss is hard Annette. It’s not something we can stop. Please sit down.” Officer Reynolds said walking in. 6

I sat down still in a fury of tears. I would never and could never really love again. It would hurt me to much to have anything repeated such as what happened to David. What was I to do? What was there even possible for me to do right now? I described the men running after us as best as I could. They had gotten away and the heavens and earth all knew that they would come after me again being very revengeful. The officers had shown me a wanted list and I pointed out the 3 men who were chasing us. Just my luck, they were the guys who had been on the wanted list for raping for the past 5 years. They were said to be uncatchable and that they gave no mercy. 7

The officers suggested that the best idea for me now was to go into the witness protection program. I couldn’t refuse such an offer. Being in the witness protection program they set you up with a house and job and depending on your age even a new family. They gave me the new name of Lyla (lie-la) Elizabeth Reed. I was to work as a 6th grade English teacher at central school. It would be interesting. I would be the fun young middle school teacher that the kids admired. I couldn’t act upset or sad or anything, but now more or less I would act lifeless anyway. 8

I moved to the next day. The officers got you out of there rather quickly. When I was fully moved into the furnished apartment I pressed the rose they gave me and framed it putting up on my bedroom door. It had stitched lettering next to it that said “The memory of David will live forever in this home.” It was really pretty and I wasn’t to start my job till Monday anyway. Within Friday and Saturday the project was completed and it was actually really beautiful. Monday morning I sat down at my desk an hour early and the principle came in saying “Good morning Miss Reed.”9

“Good morning Mr. Michaels.” I said, “Feel free to call me Lyla.” I had spent all weekend trying to get used to being called Miss Reed or even Lyla, but it is a very pretty name.10

“Of course Lyla, and you can call me Dominic.” He said, “Now the curriculum the children were working on was spelling tests chapter 3 and they are scheduled to take the test today. Then you can move on to the book Mr. Poppers Penguins. I believe they have been looking forward to it.”11

“Of course, thank you Dominic.” I said.12

“Any time Lyla. Your lunch is 6th period and the teacher’s room is the door on the right of the cafeteria. I hope you join us there.”13

“Of course, sir.” I said.14

The principle left and shortly after my 1st period students came in and I wrote my name on the board as Miss Reed. It was a little awkward being Miss Reed the English teacher considering my last name was a big part of teaching. The students sat down and I said “Good morning children.”15

“Good morning Miss Reed.” They said. The were all private school students and were very well behaved seated and listening with the greatest attentiveness. 16

I smiled and said “Today we have a spelling test on chapter 3 and then I will hand you out your brand new books. Your homework will to be to read the first chapter of the book.”17

“Yes Miss Reed.” They said. I could get used to this. Though I would never be comfortable or happy to love they had me on anti-depressants so I felt overly happy right now. 18

I handed out the test and sat at my desk. While they were doing there work I started to read through the attendance list looking at the seating chart and to everyone in the room. The whole class was there, but one name struck me: David. There was a young boy named David in this class and slight tears started streaming down my face. So much for feeling better I felt horrible now. I missed him so much and I had no clue what to do. The first child who handed there test in was David and he said “Miss Reed why are you crying?” 19

“I had a really good friend pass away and he had the same name you have.” I said.20

“Oh, I am sorry for your loss. Was he your boyfriend? Or your fiancé?” He asked.21

“He was my boyfriend.” I said. I grabbed a book and handed it to him and said “You can start your reading assignment and here’s the study guide. Please finish chapter 1 and tomorrow we will be reviewing for a test on Wednesday.”22

“Yes Ma’am.” He said and took the things and ran off. All the kids were very sweet. If David were still alive we were planning on having 3 children. We both loved children, but we wouldn’t have wanted too many. There’s no way to do anything to have children now. I refuse to fall in love again. David was my only lover and that’s the way it’s going to stay. 23

Classes pretty much were all the same. The children took their tests and I sat there thinking about David. I was going to miss him so much. Would things ever go right again? Hiding out under a new name and everything, it’s all way to much pressure. The pressure of moving, loss, learning a new name, being a teacher, and all the numerous others; it’s way too much especially for a girl like me. 24

I headed to lunch and Dominic, or to the kids Mr. Michaels, met me there and started blabbering on about random things like how my first day was going and other such things. I couldn’t get a word in if I wanted to. I had no idea he was so talkative when he said hello earlier. I finally had to say “Mr. Michaels’!”25

“It’s Dominic, please.” He replied as if I hadn’t just yelled at him.26

“Dominic, please, you talk too much.” I said.27

“Oh my gosh; I apologize. I don’t always realize how much I talk sometimes.” Dominic said.28

“I kind of noticed.” I said, “Dominic, I have to finish my lunch and get back to the classes. I have tests to administer, you remember?”29

“Of course, how silly of me.” He said and then stayed quiet and started eating. I couldn’t help but get the feeling that I made him feel bad. I didn’t mean to be a snip. Maybe I should give Officer Reynolds a call later and see what he says. He helped me through the initial grief so I didn’t look unnatural here. Maybe he could help me to be nicer now.30

The rest of the day went the same as the morning except for the fact that 9th period they were normal kids and played tricks on each other. It was more fun though. I really enjoyed all the classes. Being a teacher really wasn’t all that bad. I stayed after till 4 o’clock grading all the tests and the homework from the day before. These children worked hard, but grading seemed harder. Only grading was a lot faster, we teachers didn’t like to sit there and grade papers. 31

I went to go home at about 4:05 after finishing grading and grabbing my stuff and on my way out Dominic walked up to me and said “Lyla, can I talk to you?”32

“You didn’t say enough earlier?” I teased, “I’m joking.” I said when I saw the look on his face go down, “What’s up?”33

“Do you want to go have coffee with me right now? We could talk and I’d like to hear more about you of course. All I know is you had the top private schooling in the country. I haven’t heard anything else.” He said.34

I sighed and thought to myself “coffee isn’t like a date or anything. He is my boss and I do need to get those crazy brownie points in the whole being a teacher thing. I guess it can’t hurt, but I don’t drink coffee. Who am I kidding I can just buy hot chocolate or tea.”35

So I turned to Dominic and said “Coffee sounds great, but do you mind if I drop my stuff back at my apartment first?”36

“Of course not,” He said, “Do you know where the local Starbucks is?”37

“Not really.” I said.38

“Then I will follow you to your place and then you can hitch a ride with my to Starbucks, ok?”39

“Sounds good.” I said, but that’s not exactly what I had in mind. Could coffee be thought as a date these days and ages? Well probably, but I didn’t want to think that way. Dominic was a nice guy, but 1 he isn’t my type, and 2 I swore not to get involved with anyone after David. I wasn’t sure what to do. Considering he was following me to my house I couldn’t stand him up, and I can’t turn around and be mean either. Oh what would David have me do in this case? I couldn’t stop thinking of David. I had to call Officer Reynolds. It was the only choice I had left.40

I went inside and then told Dominic that I had to make an important phone call so he’d have to wait outside for maybe 5 to 10 minutes, maybe more, who knew how much Officer Reynolds would have to say. Dominic sat in his car and acted all cool saying “Don’t take to long.” Then he laughed.41

I picked up the phone and dialed Officer Reynolds’s personal cell phone and he picked up saying “Brent Reynolds speaking, who might this be?”42

“Officer Reynolds? It’s Lyla Elizabeth Reed. You know?”43

“Oh yes, how can I help you my dear?”44

“As Lyla, do I go out on dates or other such things to look more natural, or do I refuse or what? I can’t stop thinking of David you know that.” I said.45

“Lyla, my suggestion is going out on dates. David wouldn’t want you to live in the past; he would want you to move on. If someone asked you out then go. Have fun.” Officer Reynolds said.46

“If you say so, sir.” I said hesitantly.47

“Call me if you need anything.” 48

“I will sir.” I said. I hung up the phone still rather unsure of whether it is a good idea or not, but if Officer Reynolds thinks it’s a good idea then I will go out with Dominic. To save my reputation as not really me…I’d do anything right now…except get married or have kids. 49

I walked outside and got into the passenger seat of Dominic’s car and he said “Everything alright? 50

“Yeah, I’m fine. So coffee?” I asked trying to be nice.51

He smiled and said “Yeah let’s go.” He drove to the local starbucks and we walked in. He was talking about work and I was starting to feel relieved that it was more like a business meeting until he said “So, where are you from, before here I mean.”52

I had to think, where I could be from when I had an Illinois accent and I was in California now. “I’m from Indiana” I said. Indiana wasn’t that far from Illinois so I was safe.53

“Nice, what area?” he asked. 54

“Indianapolis.” I said, I loved that area. I had visited Indianapolis 100 times in my life…ok well that was exaggerated but I have been there a lot.55

“Cool, the city. It’s a very beautiful area.” 56

“Yes it is, but this is a very beautiful area of the country too.”57

“So what do you want to drink?”58

“Oh, umm, threw me off a minute there.” I said then laughed, “I’ll take a strawberry frapacchino frozen latte.”59

“Nice choice, I’ll have one too.” He said to the man at the counter.60

“Coming right up.” He said.61

He brought us our drinks and as I was talking with Dominic I felt more and more comfortable, but really awkward at the same time. I really loved David there was no way I could even try to move on. I went home so confused later that evening. We had gone to coffee and then figured it was to late by the time we were done talking to go home and take forever to cook something so we went to traditional old McDonalds. We even got ice cream after. It was actually rather fun talking to him.62

Over the next 2 weeks we went to a movie, dinner, and other such things. We had become great friends and he respected the fact that I wasn’t ready to move on from dating. I made up an excuse and told him that my ex-boyfriend dumped me for a guy. That he had turned gay and that the guy he was dating was my cousin. I made up this excuse that I was to afraid of being hurt, but I didn’t hate him. So Dominic and I still hang out. He’s rather patient.63

We’ve been hanging out and everything seems to click with him. He’s made me almost forget David at times, but I wouldn’t be ready to move on. Who knew moving on could hurt so badly these days, but it really did. I was sitting alone at my apartment in the dark and I looked up at that rose. That rose symbolized his love for me, but did it have deeper meaning? Could it possibly mean that love can last forever? I remember my mother saying when I was younger that “Love was a great thing, it never stops growing. You could never stop loving somebody, but there’s always room to love somebody else.” My mother told me that when my grandfather died. Suddenly I knew it was ok to love someone other than David. David’s memory would live on in my heart forever, but in turn I should move on for my own sake. God brought us to this world to spread his love, and locking your heart can’t bring god love or yourself a feeling of being loved. Happiness can’t survive without love. So I took down the picture frame with that rose and putting the rose into a new frame I stitched the words “Somebody to Love is a Gift from god. Don’t forget the lost or passed, but never close your heart.”64