The girl I never knew

Moving from Georgia to Ohio is a pretty big move for me. It was a mild mid november day when I first got onto the school bus. I sat down in the front seat of the bus. I was a bit nervous while sitting down I found myself to be almost face to face to another girl in an adjacent seat. She was a sad, quiet, lonely looking girl. She spoke but two words the entire rest of the year. She sat by herself, never once glanced upon me that I could see. I always tried to get her to talk, she smiled but would not talk. She was about 5'5 very thin, shoulder length brown hair, braces, and beautiful blue eyes. When she smiled, I got this feeling of a connection. The year went by, school came to a close in mid may. Senior year rolled around, the first day back onto the bus. There was a huge change in apperance from her. I was astonished as to her change. She was now talkative, had a friend to sit with, happier. It was great to see this girl up and conversing with fellow students. Throughout the first semester she and I played eye games bouncing stares and glances at eachother. As I grew to know her more, she's an exited little girl, saying repetitive things, laughing at pointless jokes, making up things that aren't even funny. She was, well, weird. At Christmas time right before the break I recieved a box of candy and a note saying something along the lines of "I know you don't like me, that's okay, hopefully we're still friends" I felt horrible, containing my feelings for that was extremely hard. March rolled around second semester and she now has a boyfriend. Feeling sadness as I have missed my chance, and blew it I attempt to my greatest abilities to regain control on the situation. Every move I make no matter how hard I try I cannot keep my word with myself. I speak to her and all that comes out now is anger. I feel as if I am pushing her farther and farther away. Knowing I missed my chance when she gave me that letter and candy. Now understanding what it meant, now knowing that she did like me. I cannot bare to let this go on. Relationships are strong, but the girl that I want will never be won.