All Fall Down.

I loved the way he looked at me when I sat beside him, he use to drag his fingers along my thigh as we sat, I loved being with him more then anything, unlike everyone else who treated me like dirt, he loved me, he told me so, many a time.11

I lay on the couch when he came into the room. “Jamie.” I heard his voice say, my eyes were still closed when he sat on the couch next to me. “You awake?” he asked and I yawned and hummed my reply. “Okay... um... you know how I told you we needed money to keep the apartment and to buy food and stuff?” he said and I frowned and nodded, still not opening my eyes. I could feel the cushions of the couch incline. “I'm sorry.” he said and my eyes shot open at the tone of his voice then a rough hand grabbed my arm and jerked me forward. For a while I didn't understand what was going on, I was shoved to the ground, my head slammed onto the floor and whipped back with the force of the blow.22

“Don't hurt him!” I heard him scream, but his voice was muffled, I couldn't see him though, he was behind me and I was on my stomach with a knee jabbing down on my back. 33

“Julian whats going on?” I sobbed but just received a smack on the back of my head, which made me dazed and dizzy.44

“Shut up cunt.” the man on top of me said as he leaned close and kissed my neck roughly, I whined and tried to pull away from him but he bit hard, making me cry out. I could hear Julian crying, but I didn't know why, I thought he loved me and here he was letting me get molested by a stranger. I would never have let that happen to him, ever.55

The man on top of me ran his hands up my shirt and down my ribs then slid them down the front of my jeans, fumbling with my package, I whimpered and tried to pull away from him, but he held me there as he groped. He kissed hard down the front of my neck. “Ah fuck you taste good.” he said, kissing away the tears that had fallen across that side of my face. Grinding his hips into my arse, he pulled of my shirt, leaving me bare underneath him, save that my jeans were still on me. But even that was speaking to soon as he fumbled for my zipper.66

“NO! No, please don't, ah, get off of me!” I shouted and tried to get out from underneath him but he shoved me down and ripped off my pants and boxers, my back arched as he dragged his finger down my arse and just in front of my entrance, he shoved his finger up into me and I yelped at the sharp pain that set into my body, his finger curled and my back arched. After a second his finger pulled out and was replaced my two fingers shoved hard into me, I sobbed helplessly, fuck this pain I almost couldn't stand. It was solid stinging and throbbing pain running through my body.77

I heard him clear his throat before he pulled out his fingers and put his member against my entrance, still kissing my neck and back roughly. I cried out as he ripped through the tender flesh, shoving his way up into me. He made a shushing sound, like that was going to quiet me as he tore through me. 88

“P-please get off.” I whimpered and could feel him laugh when he pulled out and slammed back into me, I could feel the blood trickle down my leg when the skin split. My breath caught in my throat, my chest heaved, trying to breathe in, but the air wouldn't come. My jaw clinched itself together, I could feel my gums bleeding from the collision of my jaw snapping shut and holding that way. 99

He coughed once and pulled out most the way and slammed back in hard, making me cry out, sobbing, my head crushed into the floor, his hand making sure I didn't move. 1010

He thrust in and out a several more times before grunting and filling me. I squirmed as he pulled out, only my legs moving, the rest of me couldn't, I was limp, only my mind wandered, the rest of me could barely move at all.1111

A rough hand grabbed the tuft of my neck and pulled me up in front of him as he sat down on the couch, kneeling me down in front of him. Fuck, I knew what was going to happen. He grinned like an idiot when I glared at him.12

“Get that ugly fucking face of you, eh?” he said and pulled me up. “Clean me up.” he said. My scowl increased and in stead of doing as he said, I spit on his face. The man growled and back handed me, I hit floor hard, my head hitting the ground then reverberating and hitting it again. My site dimmed and when it came back, after seeing stars about the room, I saw the man in front of me, a scowl on his face, when he bent over to grab me I kicked him in the groin as he did so, he cried out and fell to the ground, his hands cupped over himself.1213

Now I could see Julian, he was in shock and being held back by two other men, but now one of them ran forward and went to grab his friend, but the man shoved him away with a shout of injured pride.1314

“Get off me!” he shouted and shoved the man back so that he fell onto the ground behind him, hitting a table with his shoulder. I winced when I heard a crack and a harsh crying out from the man. That was when the other man holding Julian let him go and went to his friends side, the man curled into himself, holding his shoulder.1415

Julian ran over to me and went to grab my arm but I pulled away. There was no way he would ever touch me again; he wouldn't get a job by any means, but he would let me get raped for some extra cash. I don't think so. 1516

“Jamie, please.” he said with a tear stricken face, but I shook my head.1617

“No, never again.” I said and he sobbed.1718

“Please.” he said softly then screamed out when a hard boot smashed into his side, I cried out for them to stop but they didn't. Two of the men kicked at him then the one that had raped me came over and grabbed me by my hair, pulling me up roughly; I clawed at his hand but he didn't let go.1819

“Get off me!” I shouted and kicked at him, but he just pulled me up higher, one hand entangled in my hair and the other wrapped around my throat. 1920

I gagged as his hand squeezed in on my neck, suffocating me; he stepped forward until I smashed against the wall beside the kitchen counter, his body pressed up against mine, though this time, it was not in a sexual way, just angry and wanting to be in my face. His breath was rancid with the stench of alcohol and something else I could not put my finger on.2021

He didn't say anything for a while, just glared at me. My eyes watered from the lack of oxygen, glancing to my right I saw one man standing several feet behind the man that held me, then beside him, the other man knelt on the ground beside Julian, whom laid there without any movement at all. I attempted to shake my head in disbelief, but he restrained me from doing anything. I barely managed to get out a small whimper of detest, but only received a hard collision with the wall behind me; my hand fell limp and hit the counter, feeling something long and hard, I gripped it and when he turned to see what the two men were doing behind him, I looked down to see I was holding a small slicing knife that Julian had left on the counter from cutting tomatoes. Thank you Julian. I thought as I lifted it.2122

One of the men shouted out briefly before I raised the knife and stabbed it into the man's throat. Both the men were looking over at us now as my violator stumbled backward and fell over a chair, falling onto the ground. The two men cursed and rushed forward, but before they could get to their friend, I rushed forward and fended them off with the knife. 2223

The two men stood there, not moving, that's when I knew Julian was dead, because if he wasn't they would use him as leverage to get me to give them the knife, but they didn't, and even though he had betrayed me, I still loved him and y heart shattered into a million pieces when I realized he was gone.2324

My already tear stricken face bore even more tears when I realized such a thing, but through the sadness and sorrow grew anger and malice. He may of let this happen, but they had done it, it was there fault, they had hurt me and they had killed him. My jaw clinched and I stepped forward once I realized that the man I had stabbed was basically dead; his legs thrashed out, his hands around his neck, trying with all his might to breathe, but as the blood flowed, I knew he would die and I was thankful for that.2425

Neither of the men had weapons or they would have shot, stabbed or hit me already, so I stepped forward one more and did so until I was maybe three feet in front of them. The one one the right held out his hands and stepped to the side so that he was in front of the other one, protecting him from me. They had taken my love and I was going to take theirs.2526

“Jamie.” whispered a voice; my heart jumped up to my throat when I looked over and saw Julian struggling to get on his knees.2627

“Julian.” I breathed and fell to my knees beside him. “I thought you were dead.” I sobbed, reaching over and wrapping my arms around him. I glance back when I heard scurrying behind me, when I looked back I saw the two men flee for the door. Truly I knew I wasn't really a threat to them, there was no way I would have killed them, it just wasn't something I was capable of doing.2728

Julian smiled and coughed as he leaned up on one arm, I grabbed under his other arm and lifted him up, when he was sitting up he reached his hand out and lifted my chin, tears streaked down my face, when I looked into his eyes it all came back. He had given me up for money. I frowned and gritted my teeth. I couldn't stay here, not right now, I couldn't even face him. I pulled away from his touch and stood.2829

“I'm out of here.” I said and headed for the door.2930

“No, wait!” he said and I turned around.3031

“What do you want?” I said, my tone showing my anger and hurt more then I had intended.3132

“I'm sorry.” he said after a second of silence.3233

“I'm leaving. Don't call my phone, I won't pick up.” I said and left.3334

The air was freezing outside, cold as hell and I had no where to go, friends was a luxury I didn't have, which hadn't really bothered me before, but right now it would have been good. The only people I could think of was the friends Julian had introduced me too, but I didn't know them well enough to go to their houses and ask to hang there for a while. 3435

Without really knowing where I was going, I ended up at the park, when I looked up I was not really surprised that that is where my body had taken me, since it was where I normally went when I was confused or hurt by something or someone; I always went to the park, not really knowing why I did that, it was just the place I came.3536

I walked around the field until I came to the bench where I normally sat, but there was already a person sitting on it. A guy with his hood over his head so that I could not see his face, his jeans were tight in all the right places, hiding most of the white converse on his feet. His clothes and shoes looked bran new which made me kind of feel some what out of place. Compared to the man in front of me, I looked like a bedraggled homeless man. My shirt was old and torn, my jeans were worn and loose, my shoes were falling apart and the rubber was coming off.3637

After a second of thinking about how horrible my wardrobe looked, i decided it was to dark to really see it anyway so I walked over to the bench and sat down, for the first couple seconds the man didn't notice I was there, but then I saw that he had head phones in his ears, I only saw that when he pulled them out and set them on his lap.3738

“Hey.” he said and pulled his hood off, I nearly fainted right there; he was pail with black hair that hung over his eyes, which were large and green, his lips were full and freaking gorgeous, I didn't even think someone could have gorgeous lips, but this man definitely had them. He had a lip stud in the dimple below his bottom lip. He smiled and I had to force myself to smile back through my stunned expression. He laughed and I turned all sorts of shades of red.3839

“H-hey.” I said and wanted to smack myself in the face for stuttering. 3940

“My names Landon, people just call me Lanny though.” he said and I nodded. His voice was amazing, there was nothing more I wanted right then then to hear him talk again, but he didn't... cause he was waited for stupid little me to tell him my name. 4041

“Oh...my names Jamie.” I said and he laughed, the cutest giggle I had ever heard, for the moment I totally forgot about everything.4142

“You look cold.” he said and I shook my head.4243

“I'm not.” I said though I knew I was. I was freezing, I hadn't grabbed my jacket, so all I had was a short sleeved shirt and my jeans and shoes on.4344

He looked at me and tilted his head to the the side, raising his eye brows. “Your nor freezing... even though its 20 something degrees out.”4445

“No?”4546

“Liar.” he laughed and stood. “Where do you live?” he asked, an odd tingling feeling ran up my spine when he asked that.4647

“I lived with my... girlfriend, but we broke up and I left.”4748

He raised his eye brows again then shook his head. “Well... you can stay with me if you want.” he offered and I smiled.4849

“Really?” I asked. “I don't want to intrude on anything but...”4950

“No, I would love the company.” he said so I nodded.5051

“Okay, thanks.”5152

We walked to his apartment, which was not that far from the park, about a stones throw away, up two flights of stares and to a door, when he unlocked the door and pushed it open, the strong smell of paint flew at me, which was some what intoxicating. He flicked on a light and inside the room were boxes of paints, brushes, canvases and such, fully equip for painting. On a table stood propped up against the wall, a painting of the park from a distance with the bench and a man sitting on it, though he was shadowed and you could not see much of him.5253

I smiled when I saw the picture, I liked it, the colors were dreary and faded, making it seem so far away and out of touch, which I really liked about it.5354

Out of the corner of my eye I could see him smiling and looking between me and the painting. “What do you think?” he asked and I nodded.5455

“I like it, it's...”5556

“You.” he said and I frowned, looking over at him with a puzzled look on my face. It was then I noticed the window next to the table, I stepped forward and peered out, you could see the park and the bench perfectly.5657

“Me?” I asked and he nodded.5758

“I see you go and sit on that bench everyday, one day I was surprised to see you sitting there in the rain, I wanted to go down to you actually...” he said in a low sad voice, then shrugged and said, “but in stead I just decided to pain a picture of you.” he laughed.5859

“Yes, much more officiant.” I laughed.5960

“Aye... so... your gay?” he said, which took me aback. That wasn't blunt and abrupt at all. He laughed. “I saw you and another guy on the bench, I'm guessing that was your 'girlfriend'?” he asked and I blushed and forced a smile.6061

“Um... yeah.” 6162

“Even if I hadn't seen you out there, I still would have guessed...” he said and waited for a reply, but I gave him none, I had no idea what to say anyway, “...Never mind.” he laughed and stepped closer. He was going to do something I knew it, I stepped back and pulled my hands out of my pockets. He raised his eyebrow. “I'm not going to hurt you, Jamie.” he said. His voice was so calming, I couldn't help but fall head over heels for it.6263

I nodded and stepped forward, in the silence he stepped forward again. My hands squeezed hard onto my jeans, truth was... I was freaking nervous, half of me wanted to run and get away from him as fast as I could, but the other half wanted to be with him, wanted to move forward until I could touch him, I wanted so badly for him to hold me.6364

I stepped forward.6465

Before long I could feel his breath on my cheek. My fingers were numb, but I could still feel the tingling feeling of his warm hands interlocking with min; his hips slowly and gently pressing against mine. I leaned forward and pressed my lips against his, I could feel him smile before he kissed back. My eyes were closed when I kissed him, I don't know why, just something I always did I guess.6566

I could feel his left hand leave my right and slide down my leg, I knew what he was doing, so I let him pick me up, I wrapped my legs around his hips, my now free hands gently setting on either side of his face as we kissed.6667

His tung slid into my mouth, I moaned lightly and could feel him smile again. I barely gave a fight for dominance, I didn't like having it, so I gave it to him without a fight. He walked into his bedroom across the room we were already in and pushed open the door. Flicking on the light, he walked to the bed and pressed me down against it. Our lips parted for a second before they crashed together once more.6768

His hands slid up my shirt and mine did up his. I could feel him shiver underneath the touch. Shit, I had totally forgot how cold they were... how cold I was, so I pulled them away, my eyes shot open when his his hands stopped moving across my ribs.6869

“Don't take your hands away, please.” he said and I frowned. “The only way to get warm is to touch something warm.” he said and leaned down with a smile, pressing his lips against my neck, his hands coming out of my shirt and grabbing my hands and pressing them against his sides.6970

When his hands left mine, he reached for my shirt, lifting it up over my head. I didn't really know if I wanted to do this, after everything that happened earlier, sex was not exactly what I wanted to do right now.7071

“Landon?”7172

“Call me Lanny.” he said and kissed down my neck and torso, he was at my naval when I slid away from him and sat up, my legs off the side of the bed and my back to him. I could hear him sigh then crawl over to me. For some reason, even though I didn't know him at all, save for his name, I had convinced myself that he wasn't just using me as a one night stand and that was not what I needed right now.7273

“Jamie?” he said in a soft voice and slid his arms around me, pulling my close to him. 7374

“Yeah?” my voice cracked. I knew if he did anything else I was going to cry.7475

His lips pressed against my neck then he pulled away. “You don't have to cry anymore, babe.” he whispered against my neck. “Please stay with me.” he said and pressed his lips against my neck once more before turning me around, I nodded and he smiled pulling me down to lay with him; he pulled the covers over us and we just laid there. It didn't take long for me to drift off into sleep. He didn't have to ask me or say please or beg in anyway, because I wanted to stay, more then anything I had ever wanted in my entire life, I wanted to stay with him, cling to him, I wanted him to want me.