Unlikely Hero-continuing chapter 3a1
Three busy days had passed since Leona Ahern’s body had been found. “Big city crime.” Assistant Chief Constable Hailey of the Royal Ulster Constabulary groaned as if this rape murder was a personal affront. “One expects to read things like this in the London Times not have it happen in your own town.” He touched a finger to the teapot to check the temperature. 2
“I gather she didn’t make a pretty corpse.” Spread out comfortably in an overstuffed leather chair, Inspector Ryan Mason of the Special Branch continued reading the report he’d taken from the Chief Constable’s desk. 3
The RUC officer finished pouring the tea and brought Mason a cup. “Strangest damn situation I’ve come up against in thirty years on the job.” He took a sip of his own tea as he returned to perch on the edge of the seat behind his desk. “Might just be a hate crime. Seems the good widow Ahern wasn’t beneath adding to her government funds by rolling on her back. Preferred the English lads, those young soldiers are freer with cash and with only a limited time to explore can’t be too choosey. But, still, her being a papist.” 4
“She wasn’t bad looking.” Mason held up a photo he’d removed from the file. 5
Hailey grimaced. “She sure don’t look like that now. The son of a bitch cut her face and chest to ribbons. If she didn’t have the letter in her purse, it would have been awhile before we discovered who she was.” 6
“She had a son?” 7
“Little guy. Found him still asleep in his bed, when they went to the flat.” 8
“How did he take the news?” 9
“Well, we sure didn’t tell him how his ma died. We told him she was killed in an accident. Odd kid, he hasn’t shed a tear, just stares at us out of those funny gray eyes. Don’t think I’ve ever seen eyes that color before. Kind of creepy—the whole situation—that is. His ma going to Londonderry, The Bennetts dropping her off at her own door just after twelve. She ends up in a dead heap at six in the morning on the back steps of a bank in Belfast. Cleaning crew found her.” 10
“You don’t think the Bennetts’ did her in?” 11
“What for? The guy might have wanted to bed her, but his wife was with him. And she wasn’t robbed. Found more than a hundred pounds in her purse. Most of what the solicitor gave her.” 12
“You interview McNeil?” 13
“Naturally.” Hailey rapped his fingers on his desk as if he was about to type out his tale. “You want to talk about weird. A car hit the Ahern lad several weeks back. The driver carried him off then left him outside Newry. Doesn’t the youngster tell some tall tale about some big monster beating him up. Claimed the bloke had red hair and fiery-green eyes.” He paused to chuckle before he went on. “Lad could remember that fine, but when his ma gets to the hospital, he says he doesn’t recognize her. Swears he can’t remember his own name.14
“ The doctor found the whole incident so amusing, that when he wrote to his sister, she’s married to some lawyer in New York, he tells her the story—guess he included the names. She in turn shares it with her husband. Now things really get spooky. 15
“It seems the brother-in-law has a client, a wealthy bloke who keeps him on retainer. The guy’s name is Ahern. Course, an Irish name is as common as rain in the States. Still, it added to the fun of the telling. When this Ahern hears the story, the name Garth means nothing but the mother’s name rings a bell. Damn, but didn’t he have a brother who was married to a Leona. He contacts McNeil and has him track down the woman and kid. Satisfied that Garth is actually his nephew, Ahern makes plans to come here. He was coming next month, but now with the murder, he’s due here today.” 16
Mason pretended to be fascinated. “Some story. Maybe the kid won’t end up so bad off after all. Wealthy American uncle, he stands one hell of a chance of living the good life.” He finished his tea and sat the cup on the desk. 17
“Another?” Hailey pointed to the teapot. 18
“I’ll pass. No clues at all on the mother’s murderer?” 19
“Haven’t even a hint as to where she was killed. She had some incriminating evidence in her flat that tied her to the IRA. She was picking up information for them while she diddled the English soldier boys. The body was dropped where it was found, naked except for some torn clothing and her purse. The Bennetts last saw her going up to her door. Neighbors on either side were sleeping, didn’t hear a commotion. Lad said she left the house in the morning. Left him locked in. Never saw her again. Sure gets to me the way that kid didn’t cry.” 20
Mason grinned. “You’re not considering her son did her in?” 21
“Too small.” Hailey didn't laugh as he said, “She was raped. And he couldn’t have carried the body, let alone driven her away in a car. Still, the coolness of the kid really eats at you.” 22
“It’s likely a form of shock or denial. You said he’s just after an accident himself. When the full weight of her death comes to him, he’ll react.” Mason stood, tossed the file on Hailey’s desk and stretched. “You might be thanking the Lord, his uncle’s here to see the lad through the grieving.” He got to his feet. Rubbed his forehead like there was a pain inside and groaned. “Wish all I had on my plate was a rape-murder.” 23
“The London blokes still burning your tail over McCarthy’s execution? That was some clean job.” 24
Mason shrugged as his features took on a disgusted frown. “Hennessey wasn’t three feet away from the Minister, when this big fellow came out of nowhere and pumped two bullets into McCarthy’s brain. By all rights the Constable should have at least winged him. He shot off a full load. Hennessey followed the Ford for a good five miles before he lost it when the storm hit. The son of a bitch was good, probably a professional, and he sure had an assist from the heavens.” 25
“The auto was no help?” 26
“Like you thinking it would be.” Mason’s laugh came sharp and quick. “Had four owners at one time or another. Been in a yard abandoned for the last year. Looks like a wreck on the outside but the insides sports a spiffy new motor the likes a Yank could race at Daytona. Didn’t have that when it was lifted. The present owner had reported it stolen, but he was glad to be rid of it.” 27
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Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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Still loving it. The mystery is growing, I'm looking forward to more. I can't wait to see what's going to happen to Garth.
~Mab
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Another good chapter
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I really liked the dialogue here. I know of some novels I've read in the past that sort of skimp on the speaking. Nice job, and I am still as enthralled and interested in the story as ever.
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Thanks for reading and enjoying my scribbles.
Dialogue has always gotten me a passing grade
but some other things 
.
So if you find goofs or have suggestions feel free to tell me.
Geri
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Nice use of dialogue...
...to convey the storyline. As I'm coming into this almost midpoint, the characters dialogue on the crime quickly brought me up to speed. It also worked excellently for me to get a grapple on the type of people who were investigating this. Great job on such a masterful execution!
If I may suggest though, what would really embellish the scene would be more physical actions mixed in with the characters reactions. Yup, they're drinking tea (nice choice in beverage as it also speaks more of who they are and why they're drinking it) but maybe put some more descriptions in of what they're doing whilst drinking the tea and talking. The type of crime they're talking about is gruesome, do they screw up their faces in disgust or distaste? Do their eyes widen or mouths hang open? Does one of them get up to pace restlessly? Does someone stare out the window out at a cloudy or clear sky, transfixed or almost stunned? Enquiring minds, wanna know!
beginning: 4, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 4, dialog: 4, characters: 4.
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Thanks for reading and commenting on my 'Baby'
...I write a lot but have a real deep fondness for Unlikely Hero--I love some of the guys in it--
no they're not real--but wouldn't it be great if they were .
I will keep your suggestion in my file for when I start on the next draft.
The end of this chapter is being posted shortly, hope you continue to read.
Geri
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Hey Geri,
I thought I'd commented on this and I have
Can't rate it again.
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I'm so mad. being the idiot I am, I lost my comment for chapter 1a. will comment eventually on that one, I promise, as I had some grammer things I saw
p2- missing comma after Times and before not
Lovely, that Mason is a character. Can't really figure out whose the bad guy here. Well, aside from the murderer. But the cop that's clearly dirty, the reporter/assassin. It's a mystery, all right. Does the boy have special powers? or am I just imagining something about ghosts? Love the part about his eyes.
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Hello shadowchild, I'm certainly happy to see you enjoy my scribbles
. I do hope you keep reading.
Ryan Mason and Alex Cahill are two of the major players in this game of life, where people like things are not always as they appear
.
Since someone challenged me to do a story about the seventies and eighties, a really weird generation for those coming of age then, I can't stop.
This is my forth attempt to capture the flavor of those years.
Geri
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This is getting very interesting. As always, it has already been well editing. I found nothing wrong but am beginning to really get into your story.
It's so nice to be able to follow these novels from the first.
Great work.
Trish
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Trish, I'm glad you are enjoying this story. I think the years (seventies and eighties) from the end of Vietnam in America--during the 'Troubles' in Ireland (lots more Irish in America than Ireland)has a lot of untapped potential. People over forty remember and my kids often ask me about those years.
I've done several novels--UNPARDONABLE SINS is another, that take place durning the time peroid before every child had a laptop and cell phone. When there was little seperation between law and outlaw (only the way you looked at it)
.
This novel needs polishing and is pretty long so I hope you keep reading.
Geri
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Hey Geri,
A rich uncle? How providential for Garth. The story is moving right along. Like the way you're dropping small bits of info along the way, it's developing the characters and building your tale nicely. Moving on. Steve
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Hi Steve
did I say thank you for reading. Once a week or so... I try to go over my comments and give a nod 
to the members who take time to read my scribbles and give me advice and opinions on my work.
Sometimes in the hassle of trying to keep up with 'Life'
and the site and writing I miss thanking someone.
Geri
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I'm posting it in two groups right now.
It's complete except for polishing and either it doesn't need any or folks don't like to hurt my feelings 
.
Thanks for reading, Geri
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Very good
Good follow up on the boy and mother and the tie between the uncle and the Ahern affair adds spice to the story.the boy will
play both ends against the middle.
beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
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