Flames of Love

The plains rolled with blueish grass for miles. Balock and Simi sat enjoying their small picnic lunch. It wasn't often that they got away from the hustle and rush of the pack. The light smell of sulfur in the air aroused Simi. Half the size of his mate he had to look up to her as she tore a chunk of meat off the small bird the brought along. She offered it to him and he took it from her mouth grateful. He thought her very beautiful with her soft yellow fur and round black eyes. He nudged her chin and licked the juices from around her mouth. She purred affectionately. He took it as a good sign and he rubbed his shoulder against hers and circled her stubby legs. Out here away from society he grew bold and let go the heat of his passion out in the open. Static electricity popped off their fur that now stood on end as they mingled. Suddenly a pop set off a chain reaction and they caught fire. The grass around them, dry from the lack of summer rain, went up like an erupting volcano. In the middle of the flames a little creature romped with its mate. Dark orange flames danced on the end of the fur on their little heads only their beady eyes and cute button noses showed through. They played and mated happily, completely ignorant of the destruction they caused.

Author notes

for contest; Just one paragraph... by tallblondie
genre; Fantasy
theme; An unusual Creature


for contest; Storywrite's Choice by HowDoYouSayLove
category; Short Story

In a list

A contest entry

any comments would be nice

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have 0. (?) (Line numbers)
    Ratings:

Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • Dual.Of.Fireflies
    June 29
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    Very GOOD! I enjoyed it!!!!! GREAT!!!!

  • Marta gold member
    May 19
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    Cool. Funny. I laughed.I cried..it could have been an epic novel.

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.


  • Violette silver member
    May 1

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    Very descriptive.

    Your writing shows promise, please continue
    It really was amazing what you did with just one paragraph but it was one of the longest paragraphs I have ever read. Sweet as creature!


  • artaq gold member
    April 22

    Edit | Reply
    You never disappoint! I loved the imagery in this piece. you portrayed alot in just one paragraph. Good Luck in the contest!
    This seems like something like a Native American story or legends in other countries to explain fires.. Awesome!

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.


  • Heropsycho
    April 19

    Edit | Reply
    Hmm, very interesting indeed. I like this idea a lot, something so innocent and carefree that can cause so much destruction unwittingly. Very cool creature


  • VelvetWings
    April 13

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    This is a nice write, you could surely improve it by double-checking and fixing some punctuation errors and changing run-on sentences.
    The imagery was good though, and I did enjoy reading it.
    Good luck in the contest!
    ~Sparrow


  • tallblondie gold member
    April 13

    Edit | Reply
    Another great use of the two prompts chosen. The frollicking and playful nature of these two creatures were borne out well with both the descriptions and the mood of the piece.

    Thank you for your entry in Just one paragraph...


  • lavanya
    April 11

    Edit | Reply
    Very beautiful imagery...well discribed and strong. i like the idea of this creature. well done dear. really goo djob.
    good luck too.

1 - 9 of 9