Untouched1
The sun shimmers in all mighty
As if a ray of ecstasy has touched upon it
The moon sparks in a beam of silver dust
As if the Gold was stolen by a leprechaun.2
Yet it seems untouched as it’s blessed on the depressed cloudy grey illusions we call sky.
Depression is against all wills as the thrill that flows is alter of change which even mere animals tend feel ahead when it travels to their puny scarlet veins.3
This poem is untouched as only the writer’s fingers blossoms against it blissfully yet magically 4
Magic is untouched as black and gold glistens against each other as black and white people moves one another as strangers past each other without no existence to the world as they say a ‘mere friction’ is caused upon them… strangers… untouched.
Author notes
This is something which I just happened to type on my laptop...
Do you understand the hidden messege?
Do you REALLY understand it?
Please let me know and any critical views welcome 
Thank YOU!
-Missi
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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nice
This is very sweet. I enjoyed reading it very much, keep up the good work!
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I like it, it makes you think... Though, I would like to know what the hidden message was, I have an idea, but knowing me, it's far off
It's really good, you should enter it into contests,
Well done,
~Dream♥
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I really liked everything that you used in this poem. The words were magnificent. This was very good MJ, I didn't really see any errors. Very well done, on writting this
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pretty good. although i unnerstand it, dosnt mean its bad..just..."offbeat?". has pretty good fluidity, good wording, and is quite uncliche. thats more than i can say about a majority of the stories here though. i cant really critisize much but i can say that there is one line that semi-breaks the flow.
like to improvitize the piece i say take out the last line on the second paragraph. while the entire "story" is more or less "constant", no wrong word, its...like....realistically-semi. that line breaks it off. the word "leperchuan" cna never be serous. its like the nerd-words :burrito, ninja, chuck norris.
but otha than that its pretty good. hope to see more of your works later
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The pain and loneliness of merely existing in these times?
p3..tend "to" feel??
p4..fingers blossom
p5.. black and white people move...
I love the words you use and put together in this poem, like puny veins, and fingers blossom...blissfully...wonderful!
I think the last paragraph could be looked at again, maybe putting in some punctuation...but I am not a great reviewer of poetry, I just love it. Great job
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