That moment

Have you ever realized how beautifully frightening that moment is – the moment when it finally hits you that you’re in love? It’s as if you were living your life everyday, completely unaware of something right in front of you, only to wake up one morning and see it staring you straight in the eyes. Yeah, it’s kind of like that, only more important than a phone call that forgot to get returned or an unsent letter to a college. It’s one of those things that you can’t forget once you see them – like the last moment you have with someone before she dies.1

And it’s frightening, not only because it was so obvious that it was hidden, but because of the possibilities it presents. Suddenly, the life that you’ve been living, the one in which nothing really significant ever seems to happen, has endless possibilities. Should you tell that person how you feel or should you keep it to yourself? Either way, there are so many possibilities, way too many to even play out in your mind.2

And even more than just the fear of varying outcomes is the fear of not knowing. What if that moment was meant to change your life and you let it fly away like a piece of paper during a hurricane? 3

When you realize that big part of you, is more lost or gained? Do you gain fear or lose it by choosing to say or not say how you feel, to put or not to put yourself in the headlights like a lost deer? 4

How does your view of the person change? Is he more spectacular in every way or are some amazing qualities just more prominent than others? Does her beauty in your eyes make you beautiful to her? If it doesn’t, it kind of seems like a waste, doesn’t it? All of these minor moments and snippets of your life held together by bits and pieces of the realization of your love dedicated to that one person, and he may not even care. That’s the worst, isn’t it – when you realize that someone has such a huge role in your life, that someone makes the sun shine just a bit brighter or that one set of eyes can create boundless possibilities in a world where things just sometimes don’t fit.5

But whatever the action you take, and whatever the reaction you get, that moment is priceless. There is nothing more amazing than realizing that in a world where loose ends never seem to get tied up, love has prevailed and glued together all of the lost, mismatched pieces of the puzzle that is the world, that is love, and most importantly, that is your heart.