Anniversary

Since I was five I wanted love, from anyone there could be. I was pushed away by friends, family, boyfriends and lovers, and now, everything has come to it's end.1

I reveal to myself the destructive power of my paranoid disorder, the dark, cruel, sadistic part of me that was always praised, cherished, loved.2

My Creativity.3

It destroys me. Alternate personalities I create for those around me, crusading to find the ultimate bitch queen that I can crumble beneath.4

For some reasons, with little exception, I attract arse holes. Total wankers hell-bent on their own ascension, never mind if they shit on me to get there. But, life goes on, and on, and on.5

Forgive me, I'm still the same sixteen year old, angst ridden fool that believed love would be given, that it was a right, oh no, that part is well and truly gone!6

There is a steady love in my life now, we're getting married at some point, children at some point, we already have a cat.7

I'm more worried about my homicidal feelings for some of my ex's. Bunny boiler? Honey, I skinned the damn rabbit and sucked it's blood. Wake up, I'm a closet goth about to explode.8

So this new fighting thing is good, maybe I'll just come home and throttle the lot of you. I keep winning, and I don't intend to stop now. 9

Watch this space, the new Dream Autobiog is coming, and it won't be me dying...