A Mage's Resurrection

The warm sunlight filtered in through the curtains and into the eyes of the small bedrooms sleeping occupant. He groaned as the sun shone through his tightly closed eyelids not wanting to get up but knowing he had to. He sighed as he opened his beautiful aquamarine eyes and squinted at the bright light. He yawned as he sat up and stretched, the muscles of his shirtless torso rippling causing the beads of sweat that rested on them to slide further down until they were absorbed by the soft cotton of his night pants. It was another scorching hot day and the rising sun adding it’s heat didn’t help it any. The wood floor was cool to the man’s bare feet as he walked across them towards his tiny bathroom. He looked at the tub and smiled as he poured the already gathered water into it and relieved himself of his night clothes and slid into the cool water. He instantly felt the heat from his body evaporating as his hard body submerged into the coolness of the water. He smiled contently as he relished in his temporary escape from the inferno that was summer.1

He sat in the water for a little while before he dunked his head under wetting his short, thick, brown hair and when he came back up he ran shampoo though it washing it clean of the sweat from the night before. Once he was satisfied with the lather and how clean it felt he dipped back under rinsing it. When that was done he then proceeded to wash his body in his usual herbal soap that caused him to smell like a medley of desirable spices. He ran the rag over his washboard abs and stopped as he ran it over a huge scar that resided on his stomach going all the way across his side and to the start of his back. He sighed as he looked at it and wished that it would just disappear. The scar was a constant reminder to him of his foolish days in the city of Ifriat where he had agreed to be turned into a wolf to protect a woman that he loved, only to be shunned for his efforts. He remembered all too well the punishment he had gotten for his crime as well. He had once been a white mage and the order of the white mages sentenced him to death for mingling with the black arts since the man who changed him into a wolf was a black mage. He had already had the injury that gave him the scar which he hated so and had been fighting off an awful infection finding sanctuary in the black mage’s home. He started to get a little better when he was found by the white order and they took him from the bed busting most of his stitches as they done so and took him to meet his punishment. He was sentenced to death so the lackeys of the white order took him out deep in the woods down the mountain Ifriat sat upon and finished removing the stitches and left him naked in the woods to bleed to death or to die of an infection, they didn’t really care which. 2

Fortunately for him however he was rescued by a band of traveling gypsies who took him in and sewed him back up and gave him medicines to fight off the infection that was trying to retake his body. He healed on the road and by the time they reached the town that he now resided in he was healing fine and was able to get to his feet although his body was still weak and couldn’t support him long. He was accepted into the town where he now owned a little house and had a job as a blacksmith apprentice. He even had a few friends. He never told them of his past wanting to leave it behind him forever. The only thing he kept from his past was his name, Cyan. Everything else, even his magic, he left behind. He hadn’t used a single spell since he had arrived in the little valley town of Trona and that had been almost two years ago. 3

He sighed again as he washed over the scar and finished his bath and then got out of the tub and got dried and dressed. He didn’t have to work this day but was supposed to meet Gwendolyn, his best friend, at a local tavern for breakfast. He didn’t know why she didn’t just cook breakfast like every other woman in the town but he never confronted her about it. He smiled as he got dressed and slid on his boots and after running a brush though his hair that was now short ending at the nape of his neck he headed out to meet Gwendolyn.4

Cyan walked down the dusty street of the village smiling and waving at the people as he passed by them. Everyone was very friendly here and he couldn’t have asked for a better town to wind up in. He was surprised at how easily they accepted him with no questions asked about his past, or about him in general. He was happy that they didn’t pry. The less he had to talk about his past the better off he was, and the happier he was. 5

While he was thinking about the townspeople he came upon the little tavern and Gwendolyn, or Gwen as he called her for short, and greeted her merrily “Gwen, how nice to see you this morning.” he said as he took her hand in his and placed a gentle kiss upon it. Gwen giggled as he did so and shook her head “Cyan you are such a charmer.” she said as she pulled her hand away and headed into the tavern with Cyan behind her. They found a table and sat down while the bar maid came over to take their order and handed them some ale to drink. “So, what do you plan on doing today after work?” Gwen asked as she looked at Cyan curiously. Cyan shrugged having not thought about it “I don’t know, perhaps go home to a nice tub of cool water and go to bed?” he asked more than said. Gwen smiled and shook her head “Come on now, you have to do something other than work and sleep. Don’t you have a hobby or something?” “Well I read a book every now and then.” he said “reading isn’t really a hobby.’ she argued “Then what is it?” he asked with a smile. “I don’t know, a past time not a hobby. So if you’re not doing anything after work why don’t you meet me at the Ol’ Oak Inn and let me show you something that I found. It’s really fascinating and I think you’ll like it.” she said. Cyan looked at her curiously “What is it?” “Well if I told you that it wouldn’t be a surprise now would it. Just meet me after you get off of work and have cleaned up. You’ll see then.” she said just as the bar maid brought them their food and they ate their breakfast.6

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Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • Tiger-Lily
    March 28

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    I like the general fantasy feel behind this but...

    You might wanna break up the huge chunks into smaller paragraphs for easy reading. Whenever someone else starts talking, start a new paragraph. Also, it ends rather vaguely. Is it unfinished?

    I like how he "flashbacks" over the events leading to where he is now. Good trick there.

    Overall, a good write but could definitely use a lot of touch-ups.

    ♥ HT

  • IheartEC
    March 28
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    omg omg

    omg omg, i ed it, my fav chaptyer was the 1st one!!!! omg omg soo good!!


  • Rain86
    March 28

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    OMG a sequel!! YAY! I can't wait! Of course as you already know, the first chapter was just incredible. I love Cyan, I'm going to have to steal him. The descriptions were just awesome and your phrasing and dialogure were perfect! It's no wonder why I love to read your work As for the technicalities on grammer? I thought your grammar was brilliant and that this chapter is the beginning of a wonderful story!

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.

  • himan
    March 28

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    Um. Lots of grammar errors in the last sentence. Um, lots of run-on sentences, work on that. Looks like you were in a hurry to write this. But still, interesting story! I would like to see what happens next. 9.1 out of 10! =)


  • gocubsgo25 silver member
    March 27

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    Despite some grammar errors (what happened in the last paragraph?), this story was all right. The dialogue in the last paragraph should be broken up; each time a different person speaks, start a new paragraph. The story, while short, was pretty good, and reads like a first chapter, ending with a mild cliffhanger to try and keep the reader reading. However, my kind-of problem with it is that you assault the reader with a lot of information stuffed into a few paragraphs. My advice is to spread it out more, use a sentence here and there, not a full-blown narrative paragraph.

    Thanks,

    Cubby

1 - 5 of 5