Nothing Can Wash That Away

A gun was pressed to my temple when I woke the next day. His foul breath was heavy in my ears. I almost screamed, I just wanted to get away.1

“ Shhh…Let me think….” Jeff whispered his green eyes still insane with drugs and violence. I held as still as I could silent tears streaming down my face. He was going to kill me now. After all I survived the night before he was going kill me now in this bed.2

I thought he loved me. He promised to never hurt me, but instead he betrayed me in the worse possible way. He let his two buddies rape me a gun pressed to my temple, and a gag in my mouth. 3

“I could kill you. I hope you know that they want me to. We could throw your body in a oil rig, no one would find you. I am going to give you a chance though. You rat us out to the cops, then I make bail and kill you. I promise it will not be quick either.” Jeff smirked at me bending to kiss my tear stained cheek. I nodded whimpering a little, but I couldn’t speak.4

“Good baby, I really could have loved you. If you hadn’t been such a bitch we really could have been something.” Jeff whispered heading for the door. 5

I heard the front door slam a few moments later, then a car start. The tires squalled, and then nothing. Silence was almost more than I could take. It weighed on my fragile mind like an anchor hung around a drowning man’s neck. I sobbed and wailed. I pounded the pillows and broke things. 6

“At least he untied me before he ran away.” I said out loud just to break the silence. I ran to the toilet and through up everywhere. I had given up everything for that son of a bitch, and look what happened to me. 7

I had a job and a car. I was in college and was going places. All of that was gone now. I could never get it back. I had dropped out of school, because I couldn’t afford it. He wouldn’t work. My car was still there if he hadn’t stolen it. My job was gone now. I would have to quit just to get away from this nightmare.8

I started the shower, and jumped in. I scrubbed and scrubbed until my skin was bright red from the hot water and friction. The nightmare replayed over and over in my head as I sank to the floor my head on my knees. 9

I had just come home from work. It had been a very long day, and I was ready to relax. I knew as soon as I saw the blue Corvette in my drive that I wouldn’t be getting that. Jeff’s two friends who’s names I had never learned was sitting on the couch when I came in the door. The house reeked of drugs that I had never tried. I didn’t even want to know what they were doing. Jeff came out of the kitchen grinning like the devil. I winced as I made my way to the bedroom. 10

‘ I’ll just find a book to read, and hang out in here tonight.’ I thought throwing my bag on the bed. I didn’t hear Jeff sneaking up on me, but I did hear his two friends snickering. I was half turned when he hit me.11

I think I may have blacked out for a moment, because the next thing I remember I was pinned to the ground. My pants were gone along with the rest of my clothes. Jeff was holding my wrists, while the bigger of his two friends pushed himself into me. I screamed through the handkerchief in my mouth, but they just laughed.12

My mind shut down then. I may have blacked out again. I don’t know for sure what happened after that. The next thing I remember Jeff was sitting on my chest pounding my face again and again. I thought they were going to kill me for sure.13

I thought of my mom’s warnings, and my dad’s offers to come home. I wish I had listened to them. My sisters tried to tell me to blow him off that he was a loser, but I wasn’t used to being chased. I had always been the nerd, the bookworm, and the outcast. I jumped to fast, and now I was going to die. I fainted again, and didn’t wake until morning.14

The water was cold now. The icy sprays woke me from my reverie, and I turned off the water. My tears were washed clean, and now anger was taking over. I smashed everything that was his right down to his prized hunting rifle. He wouldn’t walk away unscarred. Fear finally over whelmed me though, and I packed everything I could into my small car and drove away. 15

I knew I would heal someday, but that didn’t wash away the pain.16

Author notes

This is a true story. I can talk about it now. It still hurts, but I have a lot of support. Maybe one day the nightmares will stop. I can't wait for that day.

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • Frozen Angel
    June 2

    Edit | Reply
    I'm glad you have the courage to talk about an experience like this. That is exactly the theme I'm trying to get across with this contest.

    Like all the others, I'm terribly sorry that this had to happen to you.

    I really like how you've incorperated the thoughts in the story; it gives it a much better insight. I would possibly think about describing the relationship BEFORE you found out about the abusiveness. How did he catch your attention in the first place? What went through your head the first time he abused you?

    Also, you might explain whether his friends raping you was a typical, everyday thing, or if they just did it on occasion.

    Those where just some questions I had while reading.

    ----

    There are a few corrections you can make:

    paragraph 7: I went to the to the toilet and through up everywhere - "through" should be "threw".

    paragraph 14: "My sisters tried to tell me to blow him off that he was a loser, but I wasn’t used to being chased." - It should be: "My sisters tried to tell me to blow him off that he was a loser; but I wasn’t used to being chased."d

    In other words, you can replace the comma after "loser" with a semicolon since you follow up the phrase with a statement about the same subject.

    Thank you for taking the time to enter my contest.

    *Frozen Angel*


  • GossipGirlLuvR
    May 18
    Edit | Reply
    Wow. Really good job! I love this. I wish you the best of luck in my contest.


  • pink polka
    April 22

    Edit | Reply
    You never told anybody? Gees. But anyway, this is a seriously good story, and I'll believe you that it is true. That's horrible.

  • sassiefan
    April 6

    Edit | Reply
    wow! I am truly glad that you are doing okay.
    thank you for sharing that story and hope you reach
    someone and hope they have the courage that you did


  • Bethany
    April 1

    Edit | Reply
    I'm sorry about that happening to you, it shouldn't happen to anyone.
    You should label the story better, I pesonally am not offended but there are other users, and yourger children, who would be
    And in paragraph 7 every were should be everywhere
    and in paragraph 8 quite, doesn't make sense, you might have used the wrong word or just phrased the sentence wrong
    A very emotional story, good job


    • Night Terrors
      April 1
      Edit | Reply
      ty for pointing that out I fixed it. I thought I had adult on this I guess I didn't I went back and fixed it.


  • Rawrr.
    March 31

    Edit | Reply
    That shouldn't have ever happened to anyone. I am actually sorry that happened to you, no-one should have that done to them. And I must say, I'm impressed that your able to talk about it. Hope he pays for it.


  • Luci Ferraris
    March 26

    Edit | Reply
    I can't descripe how I feel with you. Such men should be placed with their back against a wall, and be shot.
    Never the less it was a very good story.

    beginning: 4, language: 4, plot: 4, ending: 4, dialog: 4, characters: 4.


  • schlo5398
    March 24

    Edit | Reply
    I am so sorry for what happened to you. An act like this should never happen. It a shame that it happens. I hope you are able to recover well. I actually cried.

    Thank you so much for entering the contest.

  • SilentMoonDance
    March 23

    Edit | Reply
    This is horrible, what happened to you. No one should have to go through that, NO ONE! You're really beautiful, couldn't you see that? Family may be annoying, but in your case, they seemed wise in expressing their concern for you. Those people were wrong to treat you the way they did--to violate you. Especially your boyfriend, what a douche.
    I hope you reported this to the police, it would be nice for you to have some form of justice.

    • Night Terrors
      March 24
      Edit | Reply
      Thank-you I am getting better now and he is in prison for life. I unfortunatly was to chicken to turn him in. He kid napped a 13 year old girl. He is in for life. It makes me sick that I wasn't braver. If I had been then she wouldn't have had to suffer.


  • New Moon
    March 23

    Edit | Reply
    Thanks for entering this in my contest. This was a good story and fitted the requirements for the contest. It flowed well.

    And I'm sorry that this is true, hon. I understand how you feel. I've been threatened by the man that claimed to love me as well, but not with a gun. If you ever need or want to talk to someone, you can with me.

    Take care.

    --Rosalie--

1 - 12 of 12