She walks down the school corridor towards her classroom. She can feel envious eyes upon her. Envious for different reasons. The guys all want her, and the girls all want to be her.1
None of her admirers realize that what they see and envy isn't her, but a mere shadow of herself. Nobody knows the real girl. Nobody tries to know her.2
Her true beauty is hidden behind the layers of makeup. She's drawn into herself, and won't let anybody near. Though she's envied and admired, she doesn't feel wanted.3
Her admirers only see her looks. They can't look deeper, to the smart, funny girl lurking inside. Even her mother, who tells her daily how beautiful she is, can't see the person she longs to be known as.4
No one will ever know her, because they're blinded by prejudice, and are distracted from the person by the first impressions.5
No one will ever see that funny girl, because they think that beauty really is only skin deep. Nor will they see that smart person, the one behind the long, blonde hair and sparkling blue eyes.6
No one will see the scars on her wrists, or the way she cries herself to sleep each night. No one will ever know the way she scrubs the black mascara streaks off her cheeks each morning before coming to school. She won't let her guard down for a moment.7
No one will ever see the girl behind the masks. No one but me. And I can't do a thing to help.8
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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this sounds really familier to me... almost like it was in one of my story contests of the past any way good luck i like it.
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This is so beautiful, it is a little short, it would be good if you could make it longer without dragging it on, i think towards the middle it gets a little bit repeditive, but still it is a good concept, i wish the best to your friend, the best of luck to both of you, i will qualify this, you have a shot at the prizes because i like your wording and ability to draw back to the facts, good luck with the second round!
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This was a wonderful story. Isnt it amazing the people dont under stand that, outside beauty can be changed in an instant but inside beauty is there for life.
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I think that this was short and to the point, showing the way that people are ignored for who they are and just how superficial society has become...
Thank you and good luck
Flutta
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I always wish to be other people...some girls at my school are so gorgous and they attract everything I want...
One sentence reminds me of that:
"Nor will they see that smart person, the one behind the long, blonde hair and sparkling blue eyes."
Wow! That was an incredibaly good write! Good job!
~Merber~ -
not being full of myself or anything like that but i get the same thing i very much doubt that girls wanna be me but every boyfriend i have always asks for more than i can possibly give it tears me to pieces but hey anyways im not modest atall ...lol haha
brilliant write its awsume
xsophiex best of luck !
xxxXXXXXxxx
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I agree with Epona-really direct and right to the point. I used to (and still do sometimes) at girls pretteir than me and envy them. their looks and thier boyfreinds and all. but i remind myself that looks aren't always what they appear to be. There's always something hiding beneath the layers. This is an awesome piece. I think this would be great in a magazine- go to teenink.com and submit this piece-its that good really!
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Really poiginant but still direct and right-to-the-point. I like the way you've left questions in the reader's mind by "introducing" the helpless character right at the end. Very effective and well written but not overdone. Great write.
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Woah this is so tru to life and really well written! There are some girls at my school who many people envy but I know that they aren't happy because of the reps they have so I feel sorry for them. Great write!
Kitty
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