In a small park, filled with nothing but falling leaves as the autumn breeze blows by and the birds are singing quietly to themselves, a couple sits around a table having a lovely dinner. In the middle of the table lit a candle, burning brighter each time the beautiful melody was sounded from the depths of a violin. The night was so peaceful and calm, and everything in it seemed so perfect.1
“Joey, this is so romantic,” exclaimed the girl. “I think this is the best dinner we ever had. I mean I am really getting sick of eating Burger King all the time. And as for the suit it is very classy. I am so proud of you wearing something besides Gap for once.”2
“Well lisa, I think you are beautiful tonighh.....wait a minute, the burgers a Burger Kind is awesome, and so is Gap. Can’t you see that Gap stands for Gay Awesome Person. And gay is in happy, not gay as in Im in to dudes kind of gay. But all of this is not the point. The point is that I love you, Lisa. You are the most amazing person I ever seen. You are funny, kind, and totally kick *bunny* in sport. You even beat most guys in arm wresle, including me. So I am asking you Lisa.....” said the guy kneeling with one knee as he took out a ring. “Would you marry me?”3
Lisa hesitated for a moment, trying to figure out what to say. She looked back at all the times he spent with joey, those happy and pleasant memories brought a smile to her face. She finally calmed down a bit and said, “ Im a dude.....”4
Author notes
This what we call the "Ohhh moment" in a relationship. Where we find out something about the person we are dating that we do not like. Moral of the story is "Make sure you are dating the the right gender before proposing to them."
This story is dedicated to all of those who recently had a break up, sometimes he/she is just not the right one for you.
A contest entry
- Come, Make a Difference! Let's laugh a story together :D by caitecola.
175 points, ended April 5, 4 entries
Honorable mention
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Make me Laugh out loud!! by IceIceBaby.
175 points, ended March 22, 15 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Only For Laughs by TheDecree.
350 points, ended March 26, 19 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Variety GALORE!!! by Keirii.
175 points, ended April 5, 14 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Cheer me up, please? by moonwriter.
450 points, ended April 26, 9 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - I'm talking LUURRVEE. I'm talking HILARIOUS. I'm talking FUN! by CallMeWhenUrRich.
155 points, ended April 30, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Short Stories by Violette.
130 points, ended May 1, 13 entries
Honorable mention
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Love, It Hurts, It's Passionate, but it's also brilliant....until it ends by Shadow-Kissed.
275 points, ended May 9, 19 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Short Stories by Cavalier.
350 points, ended May 20, 33 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - JOKES!!! by Carina.J.LR.
175 points, ended May 19, 14 entries
Honorable mention
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - I really really want funny stuff, but others is awesome too!!! as many points as i could give out! by Clary--Selene--Tayy.
500 points, ended July 21, 31 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Was It Funny?
Comments
1 - 92 of 92
-
Lol. Wow.
O.o lol. Oops. Wow, that's a date stopper right there, lol. Cute story, nice little twist. I like the humor, all in all, I liked it.^^ -
Well, it wasn't my type of thing...but yes. It was funny.
-
-
Haha glad u liked it!
-
-
:$ how could he not know if it was a dude? tranvestite...lol
-
-
haha thanks for reading!
-
-
LMAO! It might be a bit of a problem if you ask what turns out to be your boyfriend to marry you.
-
-
haha thanks for reading!
-
-
LOL!!!! I love it. That has got to be the best story and what a way to find out you really really have to know a person before you consider marrying them.
-
-
lol thanks for the kind compliment. Glad you got the lesson. Thanks for reading!
-
-
TOO FUNNY. I did not see that coming. The guy;s rambling was funny enough, and how he mention gay, it was like 'whoa'. this is very creative and original.
-
-
haha glad you liked it and thought it was funny. I promise ill keep writing story like this or even better, so stay tune for more! Thanks for reading!
-
-
HAHAHAHA WHAT! I'm feeling a bizarre mixture of confusion and amusement, which isn't a bad thing! What's great is that you evoke a reaction out of the reader, which is the goal of any author!
The ending is unexpected and hilarious. xD
Keep writing!
-
-
haha glad you enjoyed the story, and thanks for the very nice compliment! Stay tune for more of my stories. Thanks for reading!
-
-
that was Epic.
Honestly, that just made my day. -
-
Glad you liked it. Thanks for reading!
-
-
haha i know its supposed to be funny. but the suspense wasn't there to make me laugh. and this is like very funny if you think about it. hahaha. by the way, you should recheck this(:
-
-
haha i see what you mean, after all everyone has a very different reaction towards the story's ending. So Thanks for reading and commenting.
-
-
I thought the punchline was quite good, I wasn't expecting it! :'D
The story has some grammar flaws, and could benefit from a little reworking. The proposer's babbling seems forced, and the final paragraph read rushed.
Otherwise, a striking short story, good job!beginning: 3, language: 2, plot: 4, ending: 3, dialog: 2, characters: 3.
-
-
haha i see, thanks for reading. Ill try to fix up the story when i have time
-
-
ah hahah
-
-
Glad you thought it was funny, thanks for reading!
-
-
That was a nice lighthearted approach to the subject, I quite liked it. My only issue is that it might be a wee bit on the short side for a short story.
Thank you for entering and good luck.
-
-
Glad you liked it. And also thanks for pointing out what u didnt like. Thanks for reading!
-
-
this story is HILARIOUS
-
-
Glad you liked it! Thanks for reading!
-
-
This made me laugh so hard. So much for my depressing day (lol). Anyways, there were a few spelling errors, but other than that I enjoyed it. Well Done. I wish you the best of luck in the contest.
beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
-
-
Glad this story could take some of sadness away from your depressing day, thanks for reading!
-
-
Yes
Hilarious! Nice work. You are exceptionally witty. I adore your sense of humor! -
-
lol glad you liked it, and thanks for the compliment.
-
-
nice! that was so funny. lol
-
-
Lol didnt you read this story before? Anyways thanks for commenting again, glad you tought it was still funny, after you read it the second time!
-
-
LOL. That was frikin funny!
-
-
haha glad you thought it was funny, thanks for reading!
-
-
it was awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-
-
Thanks for reading it! I will come up with more awesome stories in the future!
-
-
Oh my god...
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahha!
God, you bet it was.
This is really freaky, but funny anyway.
Good luck in the contest.
-
-
Glad you'd liked it, thanks for reading!
-
-
haha
funny -
-
Glad you thought it was funny, thanks for reading!
-
-
Wow
Haha didn't see that one coming -
-
Glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for reading!
-
-
Hahhahahaha damn. You're funny. I liked this a lot. It seems a lot of people write about this kind of thing in a joking way. hahaha Good job.
-
-
Glad you liked it. Thanks for commenting again lol
-
-
THIS WAS HIL-AIR-E-OUS! YOU MADE ME LOL! GOOD WORK! Keep up the good job!
-
-
Glad you you enjoyed it and laughed. Ill will keep up the good work lol, and ill definetly write more better and funnier stories. Thanks for reading!
-
-
holy shit that was hilarrious! i luv it.
-
-
haha glad you enjoyed it lol. Thanks for reading!
-
-
hahahaha...
Oh my Goodness Gracious!!!
That was halarious!!!
hahaha...loved every moment of this.
But man the ending is by far the best!!!
-
-
Glad you enjoyed every moment of it. Thanks for reading!!!
-
-
OH MY GOD!
This made me laugh, so, so hard.
This would SUCK to be in a situation like this, pop the question and then your lover reveals they aren't even of that sex. It actually kind of reminds me of Shakespeare's days, where women couldn't act in plays, so in Romeo and Juliet they'd have some gorgeous teenage boy dress up like a girl, and of course all the men would simply love "her". XD Good work! -
-
HAHA the good old Shakespeare's day, good thing I wasn't born back then. But there is still plays these days where a guy plays a girl part and a girl plays guys. Anyways thanks for reading, glad it made you laugh!
-
-
Totally Hehe, no prob, I enjoyed it.
-
-
-
I liked the humor in this and the irony of it too. Great job!
-
-
Good to know you liked these kind of humor. Ill be sure to write more humorous stories. Thanks for reading!
-
-
Funny
Can't say much more than that. I liked it. Love suprise endings..
beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
-
-
Glad you liked the story and the suprise ending! Thanks for reading!
-
-
wow, a weird/funny twist but cant the guy tell the diffenece between a guy and a girl? and 'Gay Awesome Person' ahaha i've heard it before but it never gets old. plz continue and messjge me when u do!
pce
-Preeti -
-
Hey thanks for reading! To answer you quesion, some guy do look like girls somehow. With some make up and a bra they really do look like a girl lol. I did thought about continuing this story, but i decided not to, because I want to leave it like this for the readers to think of the ending lol. For now Ill try to think of more humorous stuff to write about. Again, Thanks for reading!!
-
-
Haha woww.. very unexpected..?
Loved it
-
-
Good to you enjoyed the story! Ill be sure to work on more better stories in the future. Thanks for reading!
-
-
Oh my goodness! That was totally not expected. Love it tons. Love to see more of your work.
-Vio
-
-
Glad you liked it! What can I say, even i didnt believe the story ended this way. Ill be sure to write more humorous stories. Thanks for reading buddy!
-
-
When i saw the "I`m a dude..." thing I haven`t figured it out for 5 seconds. But after I understood it I loled so hard, my parents ran to me to see what`s wrong. Thanks for the short but good read. And for the LoLs!
beginning: 4, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
-
-
Im glad you liked it, after all I write for people to lol. And btw awesome dp! Thanks for reading!
-
-
That was weird.
That actually sorta happened to my Aunt Emily, except the guy was really a girl.
-
-
LOL, hearing that something similar actually happened to someone is even weirder! Well only if she had read the story before going out with that "guy". Thanks for reading!
-
-
Hehhe, this is funny. I didn't know that's what Gap stood for, very hilarious, and at the end it was funny when the girl/boy confeesed she was a "Dude". (:
Funny write (:
Good luck in the contest (: -
-
Yep that was what Gap stands for,jk. Glad you thought the ending was funny. Thanks for reading!
-
-
You choose very interesting background...the blue and red are faint, but complement each other very well and the spirals show your commitment to detail. I don't liking the places where the green text gets in the way, though, I would rethink that part. Know what I am meaning?
-
-
I know what you mean, but my background editing on this computer is not really working, but ill try to change it.
-
-
This is. . .interesting? I chuckled a little at the first part, so typical of a young couple, but the styles and the fast food struck me as being very "teenage" as opposed to young adults who are ready for a proposal of marriage.
At first the twist at the end didn't appeal to me, but unfortunately, I know of hormones that can be given to men to make them grow breasts, etc, so the reality is there, but not as common as your story leads to believe.
Clearly this couple hasn't taken part in any premarital sex, which is a good thing, lol, but I think I would have covered the gender base before I proposed to marry.
Thanks for the chuckle. -
-
Good to know it made you chuckle! You do have a good point about the food part, i try to be more careful in later stories. Thanks for reading!
-
-
Hmm. The twist didn't appeal to me all that much, unfortunately - I found it a bit hard to believe that two people who've apparently spent so much time together would never have touched upon the subject of their respective gender. Surely at some point Lisa or a friend would have referred to her as a "him"? Your author's note did make me laugh, though - that's definitely something to be sure about before proposing.
-
-
Thanks for reading. lol, two people who've apparently spent so much time together would never have touched upon the subject of their respective gender. Well...i guess joey is just not in to the "thing". Anywayz it good to know at least one of the things on this page made you laugh.
-
-
Lol, This was great!! I love this!! *Adds to finalist list*
-
-
Glad you like it! Btw i like the picture you put on your contest, it was awesome!!
-
-
I actually laughed out loud. (And this is a hard thing to get me to do at something on the internet)
Besides the already discussed gramatical errors, this story is gold.
But...unfortunataly, I still have writer's block.
-
-
Thanks for reading it. Ill try to work on my grammer in the future, and Im sure you will overcome the writer's block. Good luck!
-
-
Well the story itself as far as grammar is concerned needs some work but the ending was fantasticly funny. I like his desypherment of GAP and it actually ties in wonderfully with the end. I actually know a couple guys that could pass as girls if they dressed up a little. Very very funny.
-
-
Hey, thanks for reading it. Yep boys that could pass as girls are something good joke about. I actually mistaken someone as a girl in the boys washroom once, very awkward...Anywayz I try to improve my grammer as I write more stories.
-
-
I liked it
very blah story with a totally unexpected and brilliantly funny ending.
Cool, cool, cool.
-
-
Thanks for reading it. Glad you think its cool. I try to work on more humorous stories in the future.
-
-
LOL! Well. That certainly was an interesting ending. You'd think Joey would have noticed by now, but oh well! XDD Nice job
-
-
Well some guys do really look like girl and sound like one too. All they need is some make up, some stuff to put on thier chest, and Wah La his a girl. Thanks for reading this story btw.
-
-
Very Funny!
I thought the ending was funny, its something South Park or SNL would do.
Good Job!
-
-
Glad you like it. And South Park and SNL are great shows lol. Thanks for reading it.
-
-
That's no problem. You don't have to be sorry:
1. First and second sentence: In a small park, were it was filled with nothing but falling leaves. As the autumn breeze blows by, and the birds singing as if quietly to themselves, two couple sat around a table having a lovely dinner.
You have a fragment here, which means that you have no subject in your sentence. Your first and your second sentence could be added together like this.
"In a small park, filled with nothing but falling leaves as the autumn breeze blows by and the birds are singing quietly to themselves, a couple sits around a table having a lovely dinner."
The second part of the second sentence is the subject: the couple. Do you see the difference? It's not as short and choppy anymore, it feels like you are leading to something. Usually, fragments take away from the flow of a piece.
2. The following sentence in the first paragraph: In the of the table middle lit a candle, and the beautiful melody that was played by the violin guy some how made the fire on the candle seemed brighter. The night was so peaceful and calm that made every thing in it seemed so perfect.
I'm pretty sure this was just a goof, but the way you structured your sentences in this next part doesn't make much sense.
"In the middle of the table lit a candle, burning brighter each time the beautiful melody was sounded from the depths of a violin. The night was so peaceful and calm, and everything in it seemed so perfect."
Not as choppy again, and I added a lot of the sentences together and switched them around so they flowed easier together.
I hope this helps you out!
Caitecola -
-
Thank you!
Thanks for using the time to pointing my mistakes out, I really appreciate it. Ill be sure to keep that in mind when I write. Thanks again!
-
-
Well, yes, it was funny, but you have a few sentence structure and grammatical errors that take away from the humor, mostly in the first paragraph. Otherwise, the ending punch line was pretty good. I chuckled. Thanks for entering!
-
-
I see, but would you mind pointing out the mistakes for me, cause im not very good with grammer sorry.
-
-
OMG crack up ending so unexpected!
-
-
Thanks for reading, glad you liked it. btw awesome dp!
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 92 of 92
