Dog Ears

The truth is I couldn’t sleep last night. I’ve been thinking about the things that happened these past few days. This is weird. I cannot even tell what kind of feeling this is. Euphoria? Excitement? Fear? I dunno.1

There’s only one way to find out. There’s only one destination. This is the point of no return.2

***3

After the mass last Sunday, I passed by National Bookstore. I was hyperventilating when I saw a copy of Neil Gaiman’s Stardust. At last! I’ve been visiting the bookstore for many weeks hoping to see a copy of the book. I heard there’s a film adaptation coming. It’s never too late to jump in the bandwagon.4

When I saw Stardust, I couldn’t resist but to read it as fast as I could. Well, I’m not the kind of person who buys new paperbacks. I’m more of a ‘book hunter’ – a word I coined so I could have something to call myself who is fond of checking interesting books in NBS (National Bookstore) and then looking for them in bargain like in Booksale. As for Stardust, I know I could never find a copy in Booksale or wherever there are books on sale. I can only find Gaiman’s books in NBS.5

It’s not that I cannot afford to purchase a brand new copy. I just find it impractical. If a friend can lend me a copy, then fine. But I’m the only bookworm in the circle so it’s kinda hopeless. For books I desire most, like Stardust perhaps, which I can never afford to have, I usually settle on reading them inside the bookstore itself for free. Alright, call me a felon or anything. But duh?! Who cares if you’re not caught?6

When I had Stardust in my hands at last, I looked for a corner where there were a few customers. I made sure no roaming guards around, or worse, hidden cameras. And then I peeled off the sealing plastic of the paperback and began reading. In a matter of minutes, I brought myself into a world of magic where fairies and other mythical creatures exist. I met Tristran Thorne and somehow I could relate to him – a loser. Time flew fast as I was reading the book. After some three chapters of delight, I decided to stop and leave so as to avoid detection. I left a dog ear, of course.7

After school the next day, I headed at NBS once again. I was dying to read the next chapter. It seemed like no one ever noticed what I did the other day. I went to the shelf the Stardust copies were and looked for the one I unsealed. I kept it at the backmost part of the row. OMG! Someone might have known the crime I did after all. I was shocked when I found a note stuck on the very page where I left the dog ear.8

It was a small piece of paper, torn from a Stradmore notebook I supposed. I was curious about what will happen to Tristran Thorne but the note made me more curious. It said, “Whoever you are, you should be ashamed of yourself. Look up and read. Or are you an idiot?”9

Whoa! What was that? And who the hell left the note? Whoever he/she is, he/she must have discovered my modus operandi. I looked up as what was said in the note and saw the sign above the shelf: NO PRIVATE READING. Goosebumps.10

No way, I thought. It must be a prank. Like duh?! I’ve read more than ten books in NBS without being caught. I’m an expert in free reading. After reading the note, I was boggled for a while and felt a little bit nervous. But just because someone knows about what I am doing doesn’t mean I got to stop. What happened after Tristran Thorne saw the falling star? I continued reading and finished another three amazing chapters that day.11

“You must be a congenital idiot,” the note began when I found another one in the Stardust copy I was reading the next day. “Know what, this is unfair. I ordered my copy in Manila and drained all my savings. And you’re reading for free? How dare you call yourself a Gaiman fan! Well well well…what about some spoilers? Tristran Thorne will see the star in the form of -” I didn’t finish it. The one who is writing me must be desperate. I effin hate spoilers!12

After reading about for chapters, I decided to leave a reply to Who-The-Hell. I know it’s safe. I’m kinda sure the person is no saleslady or someone from the store. I grabbed my precious Post-It and left the reply where my dog ear was that day. “Okay, you got my attention,” I began. “But why care? It’s not my fault you couldn’t wait for the copies to arrive here in Bacolod and that you spent a lot. Like duh?! Why don’t you mind your own business?”13

The next day, to know what happened after Tristran Thorne found the star in the form of a beautiful woman wasn’t my first priority. My excitement was with whether I got a reply from Who-The-Hell or not. How insane. The copy of Neil Gaiman’s Stardust in NBS became a chatroom or something like that.14

“LIKE DUH?! Are you a fag? You sound like one.”15

Argh! That pissed me off. My theory is, the one writing to me is a ‘she’ because she sure is a bitch. But I realized I can’t with this fight if this is a fight or something. What can be weirder than trying to read the book you lusted for ages and someone is after you? We are both losers, geeks, name it. It was Wednesday and I was on the chapter about the witches concocting an evil plan for the star. It seemed like I absorbed the witches’ cruel intentions. And so I concocted my own plan.16

My Post-It reply said, “Whatever. Okay, I admit I’m being unfair. But I can’t help it. The movie is coming soon and I don’t want to be left out. We should not fight each other. We’re both Gaiman fans after all.” I stuck the note on the page. Calm now. With all those words I said, I will lure Who-The-Hell in my trap. I transformed myself into a wolf in a sheep’s clothing. I will try to get close to her. And once she reveals to me her effin face, I’ll slap her to death. Nah, it’s just a hyperbole. But I will surely do something like that. Why? It’s a mortal sin to kill a straight guy a ‘fag’. Just because I got no girlfriend since birth and that my favorite expression is ‘Like duh?!’ doesn’t mean I’m a homo. Like duh?!17

And it seemed my plan was effective. Who-The-Hell’s reply last Thursday afternoon was sugar and spice and everything nice. “And I’m sorry for calling you a fag. You’re right. Gaimanites should not fight after all.” A brief reply, close ended. But it was enough to know whether she could be nicer to me. I wrote a much longer reply after my routine reading. Gee, a few more chapters to go and I would be done with Stardust. My reply said something about how I became a Neil Gaiman fan, why I love his works so much, what books of his I read so far and such. I got two Post-Its for that.18

“Gee Neverwhere is amazing! I dreamed of becoming a beggar myself after reading that. And The Wolves in the Wolves is uber cool. It reminded me of myself when I was a little girl. I loved Coraline too. And oh, I’m reading The Sandman series. You should try it. Bizzare.”19

I got epistaxis with Who-The-Hell’s reply last Friday. If you don’t know what epistaxis means, forget it. WTF! This girl is an ancient Gaiman fan. With all those books she mentioned, only Coraline I digested. And I’m craving to touch a copy of The Sandman, considered as one of Gaiman’s most praised works. And about Stardust, well, I was in the climax of the story. The witch and the prince and the star had a rendezvous and terrible things happened. I stopped reading after the penultimate chapter. My eyes were tired. I wanted to read the end with my very best.20

My Post-It reply said, “Nosebleed.”21

Yesterday, I got the most exciting reply from her. Like duh?! Who would have thought? Who-The-Hell’s reply was surprisingly long. It said, “You should have a CBC for that nosebleed. I don’t want another Gaimanite leave this world. Kidding. Neways…I see you saved the best for last. Hey, why don’t you read the last chapter with the real thing? I’m willing to lend my copy. That is, if you’re willing to meet with me. I’ll be here in NBS at probably 3pm tomorrow. So, see ya around?”22

“Sure,” I replied. I didn’t read the final chapter.23

***24

What about that? My week so full of surprises is about to culminate. Truly, a feeling of mixed emotions can give you insomnia. I’m kind of excited but afraid at the same time. What if it’s a hoax? What if the police set me up so they’ll catch the culprit behind the many unsealed books in NBS? WTF! To hell with the whatifs.25

Today is Sunday. It’s been a week since I got myself hooked with Stardust. I looked horrible when I fixed myself in front of the mirror before going to church. My eye bags are gargantuan. But who cares? Judging by the geekness of Who-The-Hell, I’m pretty sure she looks more horrible than me.26

National Bookstore is quite deserted. People might be listening to the sermons still or perhaps, in the mall nearby where there’s a sale. I entered the store and looked around. If ever there’s a cop or anyone I think suspicious, I will get out as soon as possible. I was here since 2:30pm. And thirty minutes have passed. Any moment from now, Who-The-Hell shall appear and I can slap her face at last. Or shall I? Are we friends now?27

I’m loitering around the shelf with the Stardust copies. I got butterflies in my stomach. Like duh?! Why should I have effin butterflies in the first place? I looked at the clock nearby. It’s past 3pm. WTF! I knew it! This is nothing but a prank.28

And then I saw the light.29

I stand corrected. Jut because you’re a geek doesn’t mean you have bushy eyebrows and wavy hair and spectacles and such. I know it’s her. She’s holding a copy of Stardust, which, as evidenced by the visible dog ears and the spine cracks, must be the one I’m reading all this time. And she smiled. OMG! So this is what Tristran Thorne felt when he discovered the star. Euphoric.30

Her name is Sheila.31

Now let me tell some prophesized epilogue. Well, I will be able to finish reading Stardust. Thanks to Sheila’s copy as she promised. After our meeting at NBS, we will hang out more often. We will talk about farfetched things…juts imagine two geeks being together. I will indulge myself with The Sandman because Sheila got a complete library. And then, we will watch Stardust the Movie together. Like duh?! It might be my first date with my first ever girlfriend.32

THE END