"o my gosh Todd i cant believe you invited them here" said as she stormed all over her brothers room while he played his video games.1
katin had just found out that Emily was Jake's sister. she was so pisse not only had she loved Jake since forever now she had to get through his little sister. she was mad about the fact that she didn't even know that jake had a sister. GOSH!2
"well believe it" he replied in a nonchalant voice3
" whatever" she said as she walked out of her brothers room and slammed the door. She went directly to her room.4
Her stomach growling like always. Why had he done that. She thought that new girl on the team was so.... out there. She had a brother? well who was he? she hadn't seen anybody else that was new? Todd Even Knew more about them! gosh seriously!5
Gosh how gay of her to care so much about people she barely new.6
she went to sleep hoping that she would wake up after they came.7
Not so lucky she woke up ten minutes after she fell asleep.8
"Honey come down for lunch" her mom yelled through the house9
"Not hungry" she screamed back10
"OK"11
Of course she was hungry she hadn't eaten in days. Who cares you have to be thin to win. That was her motto. what she hated most was that the new girl wasn't as skinny as she was and yet she was the same speed.12
there was a knock at the door. Why had they come so fast.13
She heard her brother answer an greet them.14
"Kat come down here we have company" her brother called to her as if he was her mom. she heard giggling from Emily obviously.15
She went down the stairs hoping that she would seem happy that they were there.........16
Author notes
i dont know still dont liek writing but i have ot if i want to make it on the high school creative writing and newspaper
comments please i need major story writing help
-em
katina will be longer later
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
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thanks for all the comments i need to work on them and i will thankz for reading them.
emz -
me i think that you just switch off too much. like you know from knowing this, it kinda just switches, but i still like it. i understand
~nerny -
what i was going to do was write a prolgue )i think thats what they're called) and explain some there.i think it would help.and i';m goign to read your story
-em -
I think this is a good idea but maybe you could flesh out the characters and situation more. Give Katina and Emily more of a background. Show how Katina developed her anorexia and how she thinks and feels. I have a story about an anorexic girl it's called Eva Florian. If you want an example maybe you can read it. This is a good start, it just needs a little working on
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