Prologue to my book Sword of the Brahodun!!

Prologue1

The room was dark, a seller perhaps, not that it mattered much to the two single occupants: one, a tall, dark haired, middle aged man, black and silver clad, save that his boots were more of a faded gray color. 2

The man sat hunched over into himself, leaning on his elbows which rested on his knees while he sat on a small wooden milking stool.3

The second occupant was a normal sized boy with dark curls and a tan face; he was about fifteen so it looked, his clothes warn, though not by poverty but by use alone, for the style and thread were expenses, but just rarely taken off, looking as though they had seen many a warm ground and many a white winter. 4

The boy sat on the floor, cross legged, in front of the larger man, his hands occupied with a long thick knife, the blade a swirling design, an affect of two medals being forged into one blade, a single word written down the left flat of the blade Karaak, a rather peculiar word for a blade though, the handle was gold embossed, a silver owl on one side of the pommel, and on the second side was a silver fox, the pommel was of iron and simply made, which was strange against the elaborate design of the handle and blade. No matter really, the blade could still kill so what was the point of what the hilt looked like?5

The man smiled down at the boy, not really a fully happy smile, but not grim, just... worried, nervous would be a rather correct word to put it as.6

“Brydon.” The man said quietly, almost a whisper.7

The boy just twitched a half smile, in a second it was gone and he sat there intently listening to the older man.8

“Oh, Brydon, how you look like your mother.” He smiled wider, a twinkle in his eye as he looked down at Brydon.9

The boy smiled wide now as well, a full smile, unlike his own before.10

“I’m glad you made it, was the trip long?” the man asked.11

“Yes, but it was no bother.”12

“Good, good.” The man crossed his arms and sat up, straitening his back. “Now…. We must talk business.” He said and the boy nodded. “Yes, yes, you know of what I speak, I know you do… you are a smart lad, that I also no for a fact, a very smart lad,” his smile faded, “but this is very serious business…” he opened his mouth to speak farther and stopped, “… you don’t have to be my successor, this is not as if I were the king and you my heir… I can choose another.”13

“No!” Brydon jumped up. “No, I can do this, I am ready.” He said, standing above the older man.14

“Yes, yes I know lad, I know you are.” He said. “Be calm and sit now.” He said, pulling lightly downward on the boys shoulder. Easily enough, the boy sat. “I know you can do it… but I don’t want you to have a life like mine unless you want to or have to, and though the latter is possible, I rather it be the former.” He smiled.15

The sound of a door opening and closing in the far background sounded, but then the echo of nothingness took over again.16

“The decision is yours and yours alone,” Was the last thing that was said for several minutes.17

“I want to, I will give my life to this.” He said and the man’s former serious expression disappeared and the warm smile that was there before replaced it.18

“Good, I knew you would!” he said and clapped his hands together. “Now… You must take the oath… and on your sixteenth birthday, you will succeed me… and you will be the lord of the underground, the man of the north… the king of kings.” He said, the smile still obviously filled with pride. 19

“When do I get the book?” he said.20

“You will take the oath in two days time, let us get ready for this great day.” The older man said, reaching a hand up and ruffling the boys’ hair. On a normal occasion the boy would have been quite peeved by such affection, but right now… right now it was good, he liked this moment; he would be a better man then this world has seen, he would show them a leader, without rules this would be easy, he thought to himself.21

His day dream was interrupted with the clearing of the other mans’ throat. He looked up at the man who was obviously trying to get his attention. “Brydon…”22

“Yes?”23

“…When you are sworn in… it will be your job to keep the peace without the help of the king, Godfrey is a good man but he cannot do it all on his own, this is how we have kept at peace for thousands of years, in barely a years time you will be the leader of this organization, you must be ready to sacrifice.”24

The S word…. His least favorite word, he had grown to hate the word. When he asked about the “accident” that had happened to his mother, his father merely stated that people must sacrifice what they love most to better the world, that one day he would understand; but he really didn’t think he would, how could he sacrifice something like that, something so dear to him, he couldn’t see it. 25

He thought about it for a moment. Even if he didn’t tell the man right now if he could do exactly what he did, he would still give him his word. “I am ready.”26

“Good… remember… you will control everything, it will be your job in a years time, Brydon.” He said and uncrossed his arms, leaning back down on his knees. “There will be times of great difficulty and you will have to decide what you must do, what others must do in your name, and you must do all of thus in the good name of the king and of honor, there must not be any mistake… and if all goes well… there will be happiness,” he smiled… and then it faltered, “but if you fail…. There will be chaos.” He said in a deep undertone. The sentence would have been barely audible for anyone farther away then just their own ears. “You must not fail. Can you do this, Brydon?” he asked.27

The boy straitened his spine, sitting up again. “Yes father.” 28

Author notes

Okay so this is the prologue to the book I wrote when I was 13 and right now I am on the second book (Dark Assassin) the first book needs editing badly!! so if anyones up for it lol the second book also needs it, though I dont think AS MUCH as the first, since I wrote it when I was just a daft imaginitive 13 year old with horrid grammer lol so yeah this is to the first book (this prologue is new, written a month ago) so yeah hope you guys like it

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • Much-Dipstick
    March 30

    Edit | Reply
    This was really good Post more!!!!! You're right, it does need a fair amount of work, particularly at the beginning where your sentences are far too long you lose the reader a bit in the descriptions, despite them being excellent. I really liked the depth you gave everything, and I thought the flow was very steady and lent itself to the story well. A great and very wholesome piece of work, with no little threads hanging unfinished, and a very good suspenseful ending post more soon!!!!!!!!
    Sorry for taking so long to read serious, you have to catch me at a good moment and not let me forget xD. Thanks for reminding me even if I was slow. It was well worth it!!!!! Great job!!!!!


    • Asonine
      March 31
      Edit | Reply
      Haha, yeah, everything I write needs serious editing, but I don't have anyone to edit it lol I kind of want to post more, but this IS the book that I am publishing and have worked on since I was 13...its kind of my baby. lol. anyway, thanks mucho.

      • Much-Dipstick
        March 31
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        Lol I love it ^^ it's a great story. I'd help edit if I could, but my workload is getting bigger 0_0 but I may find a spare minute over the Easter holidays can't promise though, I'm gonna have a 13 year old cousin and my bestie around a lot of the time.. I'll try and keep writing!!!!!

        • Asonine
          April 1
          Edit | Reply
          haha thanks lol Yeah, this is from the first book, this series, right now, has two books, and I am working on the second one.

          You need to read with blood and bow as well!!! that one I actually love better then this one, and I worked harder on it too, I'm trying to write that one as a longer book, but I keep on coming up empty handed and writing it as a short.

          Thanks for the comments.

          • XD I will at some point when I have time. You have my word ^^ just so busy it's unbelievable... always logged on here, but rarely actually on :/ it sucks. I just can't seem to keep up with school work X_x lol. I'll try and you're welcome ^^

            • Asonine
              April 1

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              i am good at school.. lest it be math or science that is, but even those I pass, i just hate them lol I cant wait, im going to college this fall... well.. prlly am lol I am studdying law, gonna be a lawyer, dont know if I wanna deffend or offened though lol people say I would do good in a firm so lol

              • I'm fairly good at school I can pass everything, but I need to do heaps of revision =S so yeah... lol you really would!

              • I'm fairly good at school I can pass everything, but I need to do heaps of revision =S so yeah... lol you really would!


  • Asonine
    March 11
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    read me!!!

  • ooh, this was waay intense I totally loved it!!! I want the rest!!!

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