You Can't Fight What You Are

I can't explain how I feel. My eye's are wide. My hands are shaking, hands with no pulse. My body is trembling, a body with no heartbeat. But I can't move. Why is that? I stare at the man by my feet. He's alive still, just. His eyes as wide as mine, but then they glaze over. Out rattles his last breath.1

Now I look at my hands. What a beautiful colour, don't you think says the voice in my head, Ellie, did you know blood has a metalic taste? Tears well in my eyes, no one can understand, I know, I understand. Now, why don't you taste it for me? No, no... my hand moves towards my mouth, no! Come on be a big girl, we're supposed to be sixteen aren't we? Big girls try new things.2

Hand glistening in the filtered moonlight, my eye's snap tight shut as my disobedient arm come's closer. That red hand touches my lips that part automaticaly. My tounge darts out licking hungrily at the blood that covers me. Oh, how I love the smell, it fills me, teasing me, daring me to drain the body of the dead man at my feet, a reckless human, why shouldn't I? It's so fresh and warm and- no!!3

What am I thinking?4

What have I done?5

---
My eyes snap open, that deam again. My first memory of this life. Ugh, god the the others will think I'm a weakling for still not wanting to accept myself. I wince at the thought of giving them the displeasure of seeing me like this.6

I'm a Vampire. And I'm unique. I'm considered as a sort of prize the rest of my kind. Why? Because I still have my mortal mind, from before I was Bitten. It's hard to describe, and some times Doubled with the fact that I'm the only female and I get alot of attention from the rest of my race. A vampire celebrity, I scowl at the thought. But today's special, like the anniversary of the death of someone you loved that can't be forgotten. It's a century to the day of my Change and the Coven have decided to go on a Hunt in celebration. Will I be able to stomach it?7

Other Vampires naturaly give in to their instincts and will hunt to kill whenever they need to. However, Vampires like me who still posses what we call our 'Mortal mind' are Vamps who can control their Hunger because our human minds are not attracted to blood. So, with some practice, the killer part of me can be controlled. 8

Originaly it was hard to give in to that voice, but I clung onto my last shred of, what I call sanity, but the others I know privately call a mental problem.9

We are not shunned away for this though, because we're smarter. Better hunters, we're not as risky, we plan better and we kill quicker naturaly as we're not as distracted by the smell.10

When I say 'we' I'm implying me and Him, none of the Coven mention his name nor do many others who are wise. or maybe that's because we're the only race that remember his name. But he want's me as his partner. He is intelingent, scarily so, but the plans he has, scare the hell out of me. Which is saying something.11

I hear the door open and Mike sneaking up behind me.12

"Ellie, You're up!? Come on big girl, one century now, eh? Come o-" Feeling his arm reach out towards me I spin and slap his hand out of the air.13

"Don't call me 'big girl', not ever." I growl at him. I see comprehension dawn on his face. Only my inner voice and He ever call me that. I hate it, this feeling of weakness even though I over powered both of them.14

"Oh yeah, sorry darling." he steps forward and hugs me tightly, protectively almost, before draging me toward the door, "Come on, today's gonna be swell! Simon's coming and Ed made you a cake!"15

"Oh yeah? Out of what, exactly? Does he even know we don't eat human food?"16

Mike is practiacaly bouncing with excitement and I playfuly tease him for his childish behavior. It's nice to feel loved though. I promise to myself that I'll try and enjoy today as much as possible. I mean, how bad could it be? I could and would enjoy today. No problem.17

I'm blindfolded and he leeds me downstairs. "You won't believe what I got you!!"18

"Oh sure, if it's another garlic clove and stake I'm gonna eat you."19

"You know i find those human superstitions hilarious," he grins, "blindfold off now!"20

I gasp. The whole coven's here. For me? I look round eagerly, even Sam is here, after that fight with Jake i didn't think he'd come back. I grin stupidly at them all. "Thankyou, jeez I thought you were kidding aobut getting us all together for this."21

Carl, the coven leader, gives me a lopsided smile, pushing a strand of his long blond hair behind his ear. "Yes, all eight of us. seems a bit of a crowd compared to the usual three or four. Now you better open Mikes present before he self combusts."22

"No, garlic?"23

"I checked, no garlic, but I think he probably learnt his lesson after last year, Ellie."24

"I didn't bite him that hard," I tut reproachfully.25

"You did too!" Imputs Mike as he thrusts a black silk draw-string bag into my hands.26

I look at it raising an eyebrow as somehting from under the silk crackles. Opening it I grin. "Thankyou so much!" Throwing my arm around him before pulling out the contents of the bag. A big pack of strawberry laces, the suguary kind. You see, we can eat what we like really, but blood is what is goo fr us. it gives us what we need. It's our balanced diet. Human food or sweets. it's as good for us as gras is for them. Too much can kill us, but unlike with humans and grass. Strawberry laces taste amazing. Well, no one else in the coven like human food, but ad a matter of princible, I will do anything within reason, for a strawberry lace.27

Hearing a tinkle I see something else gleam in the light as it begins to fall from the bag. Snaching it out of the air i find myself holding a silver necklace with a little silver cross on it. I turn slowly to Mike.28

"I couldn't resist!" He cries before running from the room cackling like a mad man.