mum?

“What” I said “You’re, you’re my mum?”1

She nodded her head with reply. I looked at the women who I had though had been my aunt for all these years. All my life I had wondered what my mum had been like and here she was, on her death bed.2

“Hun, if I had told you sooner Uncle Jim, your dad.” She coughed violently “He would have killed you. When I fell pregnant with you, after about 10 weeks I went to a hospital where they scanned me into the ultrasound machine. I was so happy when they said you were a girl, I’d always wanted a girl.” She coughed again. I reached down to her drink by the side of her bed and gave it to her, but she jesterd it away. “But then I remembered your dad. He didn’t want a girl, he wanted a boy. Girls cost more with the clothing and boys, they go to school for longer and can keep the family business running. He would have killed you, even if I begged him on my hands and knees.” Her voice weakened as she took my hands is hers. “I went to my sister telling Jim that she was pregnant. I had to keep the pregnancy secret. I had no idea what I was going to do with you. Probably give you to my sister, but when I first laid eyes on you I fell in love. A week after you were born, my sister died so I named you after her, Lindsey. I took you home saying that my sister had died giving an early birth to you and her last words were look after her for me. It took a lot of arguing with your father but I won in the end, he had always preferred my sister to me. I wanted to tell you the truth everyday of your life, but if your dad found out, he still would have killed you. But after I’m gone, my will is going to come and tell him everything. But before then I want you to run. Run for your life.3

My eyes filled with tears, I couldn’t believe it. “Why run, why can’t I stay here instead?”4

“Hun, I don’t know what he would do with you. He might keep you alive still thinking about my sister or because I’m gone and you wouldn’t have my protection anymore he might, you know…” her voice broke off. 5

“Where am I going to go?” I finally knew who my mum was but only had a matter of minutes to be with her. It wasn’t fair.6

“Go to Cornwall, there you will find my best friend. Her name is Leona Bruce and when you find her, give her the letter in my chest of draws. Here take this. It was my mums, your grans.” She took the locket around her neck off and places it in my hands. She held my hands tightly. “And hun, remember that I have always loved you as a daughter and always will love you.”7

“I love you too mum.” She smiled when I called her that. We stayed with our hand holding while looking at each other in the eyes. Soon, her hands grip loosened.8

“Darling would you like anything e…” Uncle Jims voice broke off and he stood in the door way and looked at her. “Oh boy” he said while taking off his hat. 9

She was gone, my mother came and left too quickly. 10 minutes, that’s all we had of properly being mother and daughter. I looked at Jim, I hated him. I wanted him to rot in hell for what he would have done! 10

“Lindsey , don’t worry.” Jim said as he placed his hand on my shoulder. I shrugged him off and stormed out into my room. I had to get out of here, for my own good.11