being a (annoying) teenager

Is he winking at ME?” Cat shrieked, fearfully cowering against me. I laughed, and pushed her away. “Yes,” I sighed, “I’m afraid so.” I patted her back, and giggled as her mortified expression turned to pure hatred. “I HATE HIM!” We, the gang, nodded, and we glared of in the direction of the dreaded, most pervy man in the world, the one and only – Mr James, our R.E teacher. He looks shifty, under our heavy, malevolent gaze, but he keeps walking towards us, as if he didn’t just wink (which I’m sure counts as sexual harassment) at Cat. He approaches us, and Soph, in her best, cheesy-presenter voice whispered, “and the predator approaches the terrified prey...” we all spluttered and giggled, only to be increased as Mr James grinned at us scarily. Baring his big, fake-white teeth he was easily mistakable for a lion (an ugly one). “Hi, girls,” He wriggles his eyebrows up and down, “you going to join the Irish dancing class?” He sat down, on the bench, only centimetres away from me. I screamed, pushed myself away and fell on the floor. (Thank god I was wearing trousers). Elle, my dearest friend, shrieked with laughter and shouted, “MR JAMES PUSHED LAURA OFF THE BENCH!” I got up, and scowled at Mr James. “I think you should go,” I hissed, James Bond style, as Elle continued yelling that Mr James pushed me off. Which was hilarious at the time, but not when we had to sit at an hour detention. However, as it happens, wasn’t so bad, as we got to watch the fittest P.E teacher ever, Mr. Thomas, run round in shorts (dribble, dribble)...1

“So. Plan of action, girls,” Soph said, and sat down, eating a chunk of cheese." Soph swallowed her cheese, and grinned happily.2

"Well, that depends what we are planning..." Elenor, the newest girl to our group, informed us. I rolled my eyes. "The PLAN always applies to the same thing, Ellie. Or, actually, involving...two things. Which are how to get Mr. Thomas how to love us, and how to annoy every teacher and prefect in this school. Duhh!" 3

"Oh." Elenor answered, seeming huffy. I sighed, and turned to all my girls. "Righty-ho. I think... we should spend lunchtime in Mr Whathisname's (Robjohn) classroom, and... do I need explain?" I laughed, as did everyone else (except Elenor), and continued, "and then, we spend period 5 doing P.E." Everyone nodded, thoughtfully. Elenor frowned, "do we have P.E period 5?" We all looked over at her in disgust. "Neooow!" Elle exclaimed, "maths." 4

Elenor inquired, "but won't we get in terrible trouble?" Which, kept us laughing all the way through to the time... (cue cheesy music)... Mr. Thomas walked past. And we melted like the wicked withches of the west...5

"SHHSHSHSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I hissed to the small, freckled year seven. I pushed them aside, and crept around the music block. We hid under the tables, waitng, excited. Elle whispered, "he's coming in, he's coming in!" excitedy, over and over. "AMAZING!" - we stopped as Mr. Bigears spun round, he shrugged, the turned back (what an idiot) "GRACE, HOW-" Miss Dibble, the receptionist for the school, marched in. "GIRLS!" She yelled at us, "for goodness sake! Get out from there!" We crawled out, giggling. "It is not funny!" She fumed, "I've been watching you all day, and you are irresponsible fools!" Mr. Bigears stared at us in amazement. "GET OUT!" Miss Dibble finally shouted, as we cracked up. 6

"Come on year 7!" Mr. Thomas shouted, "get changed faster!" 7

"That, girls," I said to the year seven girls, "was the voice of my lover." I wiggled by eyebrows at them, Mr. James style. 8

"Urrrgh," one blonde-haired girl laughed, "him? He's... old!" And cakcled like a witch. I shrugged, and continued to daydream... Mr Thomas holding me... ooh, I'm all dreamy... "Err, Laura?" Soph said, "we're going out now. What are you doing?" I wiped the dribble () off the corner of my mouth, and walked out the changing room. Mr. Thomas titled his to one side, "year seven?" And we nodded, grinning stupidly. "Yes, sir." We smiled. He shook his head. "No... I've taught you both before!" (shit, we're busted.) He laughed, "silly me. Come on, let's go." And we followed him onto the playing feilds... pheww!9

Bethxxx10

p.s i leave it to your imagination what we did (very very very embarrassing) what happens next. 11