In Your Head

IN YOUR HEAD1

Chloe Larkin is an A student at Columbus High and has a huge crush on the smart Harrison Barnes. The problem is Harrison doesn’t even give Chloe so much as a glance. So something out of control happens that forces Harrison to acknowledge Chloe’s existence. 2

Chapter 13

September 154

I have an increase of allowance thanks to my parents because I got an A on my history test. But then again, that’s all I ever get; nothing less than A’s. And oh, I get an F in the dating department, you know considering nobody has asked me to be their date for our senior prom. But I sure do have an F minus in asking the guy I lie to be my date, because really, I don’t want to go out with anyone other than him. See, I’m not really the going out or dating type, I like to stick to my purpose of getting those A’s and hanging out with friends when the time allows me. But now this boy has this really huge brain and that for me is such a turn on.5

I’m sitting here at the breakfast table in the kitchen and my mother is spreading butter on my bread—again. I tell her ‘mom, I’m a big girl I can butter my own bread’. But she just smiles at me and pinches my cheeks and does the next crazy thing like filling my glass with orange juice and I just sit there watching that red plus yellow liquid fill up my glass, between uncertain bites of bacon. But when my little chubby brother gets this sort of attention from my mom, he has no problems. No, he’d actually complain if she neglected her spoon-feeding duties. See, my mom, she is the nurturing type and always has been. When she was growing, she take care of my uncle when their mother died so she kind of took the role as his mother, sort of anyway. She cooked and clean for my dad and make sure the household was going smoothly, like a wife or mother. Why she all of a sudden woke in the morning and decided that my grandmother (I never met because I was like, minus thirty-eight years old when she passed) was reincarnated to her is something I’ll never know. As I took a sip of my orange juice and ignored my brother, joseph, revealing his mushed garbage of food in his mouth, I observed my mother; here she was, with me and my chubby brother and my oh-so hard and tough father, the lawyer, filling his cup with coffee and spreading his bread with butter and sprinkling salt and pepper on his eggs and bacon…anyway! I should think about what’s more important, for instance, Cheyenne and Chevy who’re organizing a bake sale at Columbus, to raise funds for our senior prom this year. And no, they’re not twins, they just have the same names or the same ring to their names. Although Cheyenne does have a twin brother (actually, more like step-brother who was the same age as Cheyenne) whose name was only like refreshing water in my mouth. I sighed, just seeing him with his hair and—6

“Oh disgusting Chloe, chew with your mouth closed will you,” my mom demanded. I snapped out of my la-la land and was horrified to find I still hadn’t swallowed the food I’d been chewing from, what, couple two minutes. Who chews their food for a whole two minute? Disgusting! Joe laughed at me and yes, with his repulsive mouth full and open although nothing was said of this because my parents were locked in conversation. So unfair! Joe can go being rude and gross all he wanted and get away with it. Horrified, I narrowed my eyes at him and he simply smirked. Deciding to pay not another minute of attention, I turned to look at my cell phone. I had a message. Come early today? We gotta hand out flyers and sticker posters for the bake sale. That’s when I got up abruptly headed for the door.7

“Bye-bye everybody,” I said, looking at my parents and not my brother because I didn’t think he deserved any acknowledgement from me. 8

“Bye Chloe,” he said sweetly, which made me baffled because he was being decent for once. “Yeah, bye,” I replied, giving him a strange look, his face being the last thing I saw before I disappeared outside.9

The minute I arrived at school, I got off the school bus and was immediately greeted Chevy racing, charging papers at me. She slapped them on my hands and was like10

“Come on, let’s go put these up,” she didn’t even greet me; instead she gave me orders and rushed to the school entrance.11

“Hello to you too,” I said sarcastically, then I did a once over at the pamphlets. The one on top read: bake sale on Friday 22nd of March. 12

There’ll be goodies, from candy, cakes, cupcakes, cookies and more. 13

Be there by the football field support our school prom fundraising. 14

Goodie! I couldn’t wait, it sounded like it was going to be the bake sale of the year. 15

Not!16

Seriously, the pamphlets and posters were screaming ‘I was made with effort and beauty’, because, seriously, Chevy put a lot of work into these posters. I jumped when she screamed at me.17

“Chloe, I have no time for that. People need to know about this bake sale so that we have enough time to plan.” It was shocking; she was seriously getting all worked up about this whole thing.18

I mean, since when did she become a sale freak, it wasn’t like national security was in jeopardy in the whole country.19

“We have three weeks,” I said softly and carefully, just in case she was going to rip my head. Was Chevy going to turn into the she-hulk? Because, quite honestly, she was beginning to scare me. Rather, what I got in reply was her ignorance as she handed the flyers to anybody who passed by, her face plastered with a diplomatic expression as she did this. I shrugged, taking it as a message. 20

Shut up and get to work!21

Yep, that’s the message she was passing by ignoring me so blatantly. So I got work.22

“Where’s Cheyenne?” I asked when I handed m last flyer before disappearing to class with Chevy. We both took our seats in the middle of the classroom, with me being in front of Chevy. 23

“How should I know? You know Cheyenne,” was Chevy’s reply which sounded a little…catty.24

“Are you okay?” I asked her. Which was my euphemistic way of saying what the hell is your problem? Her behavior when I arrived was Chevy-ish a little, sure because I know how Cinderella’s ball she wanted our prom to be. But this, this was just…just…well, okay, yeah, I’ll go with catty. I wasn’t at all prepared for her moodiness.25

“What do you mean,” she asked me like I was seriously asking if the grass was green. I rolled my eyes, surely she had to notice the way she was acting.26

“Never mind.” I really didn’t want to get into it. Who knew, I might get her all defensive for a whole ten minutes then she’ll never want to speak to me then she tattle-tell to Cheyenne and, and, and…27

Let’s just say Chevy was a drama queen.28

I looked around and noted the class was filling up and still no sign of Cheyenne. I wasn’t worried anyway since she tended to turn up in class like ten minutes after it has started. But there she was (surprisingly, on time), her long raven hair sleek against her milky skin. I felt my spirits lift, I related to her way more with Cheyenne than I ever would Chevy—even if Chevy and I knew each other since kindergarten and Cheyenne and I, three years. That’s the same time I knew her twin brother—I mean, step-brother who was the same age as Cheyenne and who also was the apple of my eye… (Sigh). There he was, dressed like he stepped out of the fashion magazine. I could hear every girl in my class exhale with passion—including me. I looked at the seat beside me and prayed that Harrison would take it. I saw him looking at it and my heart skipped a beat. As he came over, I was thankful my prayers were answered and I straightened myself up. He was going to sit beside me, he was going to sit beside me!29

“hey guys, sorry I’m late,” Cheyenne greeted Chevy and I breathlessly, taking (I’m so disappointed) the seat I had mentally saved for Harrison. 30

“Hey shy,” Chevy greeted melodically and I turned around to give her a gaping stare. She stared at me confusedly. She shrugged her shoulders and I knew that gesture, ‘what’, she was asking me.31

“You’re so happy to see Cheyenne, but I never received the same welcome,” I moaned and Chevy continued to stare at me, like she was still waiting for me to say something significant. Hello! This was significant. Okay, well, maybe significant was a too strong a word but seriously, I had grounds for complaint. 32

“Chevy!” I cried, and she jumped and so did Cheyenne. I held my hand to my mouth, I didn’t mean to make such a scare.33

“hey, Chloe, take it easy, all right?” Cheyenne pleaded, like I was crazy and I was embarrassed I’d made such a scene.34

“She’s been complaining all morning,” Chevy whispered to Cheyenne and I opened my mouth. The irony!35

“I did not!” I said defensively. 36

Seriously!37

“Okay guys, you can keep it down now,” Mrs. Lowman chimed, having her back faced toward us. I sat bitterly in my chair over the little drama with Chevy this morning. I mean what have I done to deserve the treatment she gave me this morning? My eyes wondered as I had this bad temper hovering over my head when I caught the sight of Harrison and I stole a glance. He was sitting on the front classroom and he listened carefully to what Mrs. Lowman was saying. I smiled when he ran his long fingers through his black hair, at the same time, lightly drumming his fingers of the other hand on his desk. I didn’t notice I was smiling so much to myself because Cheyenne gave me this weird stare and I went: “what?”38

“Why are you so happy all of a sudden? Like you’re blushing?” she asked, her eyes intent on me. I swallowed and tried to look as nonchalant as possible because I did not, under any circumstances, want my best friend to know that I was crushing on her brother. Yeah, I know, she’s my best friends. This is the type of information best friends should know, blah, blah, blah… But, come on, when you crush on your best friend’s sibling, I don’t know…it’s just not ideal. I’ve seen it happen, your friend gets all ‘oh no, that’s gross’ accompanied by moodiness, irritability and discouragement and a how could you. Don’t go out with my brother, that’s just not the way. I’ll tell you what not the way is; it’s experiencing all that! 39

“I’m not blushing. I’m just…happy to… be at school,” I finished clumsily and turned my attention to the board where Mrs. Lowman was scribbling notes, hinting to Cheyenne that it was not open for a discussion. 40

Harrison turned around to talk to somebody behind him and I got a glimpse of his face for a moment. He chuckled when his friend cracked a joke and my heart drummed in my ears because that smile was oh so breathtaking. Sigh! Did I mention he had a brain too?41

See, the thing about Harrison is, I’ve known him for three years. But anybody who met us for the first time would think I don’t even know the guy and that was the sound of the toilet flushing part about it. In all those three years, not once had I spoke to Harrison. Seriously, not once! Okay, so I’ve said the hi-s and good-byes and the how-are-you whenever he happened to be around every time I was at Cheyenne’s place. And Cheyenne absolutely disliked Harrison, so if she knew that I mentally referred to her as her twin brother no less if she knew I had a thing for him, she would have my head. I wondered why because Harrison was such a gentleman and had brains! Did I mention that Harrison had brains?42

And the whole bogus part about Cheyenne’s dislike for Harrison is that he was truly fond of her and it broke my heart to see how she would dismiss him like he was insignificant. He even tried to learn the Japanese culture just to be in Cheyenne’s good graces. (Why would he learn Japanese you might ask? Well, Cheyenne was half Japanese and half Dutch).43

In the end though, Harrison seemed to give up and move on with his life, at the same time, kept polite where Cheyenne was concerned where he needed to.44

“I’m telling you, I hear freaky things in my house sometimes. Like the ground is shaking or something,” Cheyenne droned as the three of us pasted posters of the bake sale on the school walls. These weren’t the only posters, they were accompanied by class president campaign posters and intramural information and other things. I never got misinformed about activities and events that took place at our school because, I swear, Columbus is the most up-to-date school I have ever known.45

“Do you think your house is haunted?” Chevy asked, sticking the last poster she had and turning to looked at Cheyenne with an amused look, her dark blonde hair swishing sideways in the interim. Cheyenne’s eyes widened a little, the she smiled uneasily at Chevy and I.46

“Oh yeah, there are ghosts in our house trying to send us a message,” she replied, trying to sound as sarcastic and light as possible. But oblivious to the edge in her voice, Chevy laughed and went: “oh, puh-leez.” We didn’t want to wall-paper the school with our posters, so Chevy put away the extras in her locker. She couldn’t for the life of her shut up during distribution of the flyers and sticking posters and seriously, she sounded like a five year old who took way too much sugar because it was getting crazy; there was a moment Cheyenne and I exchanged glances and I suggested that we ditch her. Cheyenne chuckled and slapped my arm.47

“We had better raise enough money for this prom. I want it to be so special…” Chevy continued, after babbling about our senior prom, the bake sale, and other fundraising possible ventures that could be prom-magic ticket. Cheyenne ate her sandwich in silence, rolling her eyes at the sound of Chevy’s voice, while Chevy didn’t eat her salad but rather forked it many times as she spoke. I simply sat there, my attention on none other than Harrison Barnes, who was sitting at the far corner of the cafeteria with his friends.48

“…I mean I have this great dress and everything but still no date! Hey guys, I feel like I’m the only one serious about…”49

Harrison ate his salad (I noticed he loves salad) and drank his coca-cola (oh, and he loves coca-cola), engulfed in conversation…50

“…how about Rodney? Should Rodney ask me to the prom? I don’t think so, since he’s not my type…”51

…and look at him artistically eating that salad like he was in the queen’s royal dining room…52

“…oh, this is so hard. Can’t anything ever go right…?”53

…but when he drinks his coke, he’s oh so macho about it. Downing that black golden liquid all in a heart beat and his Adam’s apple bouncing up and down was just doing things to me…54

“…Chloe, you need to—”55

“Will you shut up already!” shrieked Cheyenne and it made Chevy and I jumped that I accidently tossed the drink that I’d been holding in my hand and it spilled it all over my lap. Very few people noticed because everybody in the cafeteria continued with their food and lives so I was only met with stares from Chevy and Cheyenne. Dismissing it as quickly as she could, Cheyenne turned to Chevy.56

“For the love of God, Chevy, you just go on and on about this prom…could you forget about it already!” she moaned again, oblivious to the fact that I was trying to clean myself up after I’ve been soaked in juice. 57

“Hey, why are you getting all crazy on me?” Chevy demanded so defensively, it was like somebody was accusing her of a murder.58

“the senior prom this, the senior prom that...it’s all you’ve ever talked about,” Cheyenne was getting exasperated, ignoring that comment Chevy had made. She turned to look at me.59

I wondered why.60

“Tell her Chloe,” she pleaded. I blinked. She needed somebody to back her up on this one because, well, Chevy was not hardheaded, no—more like empty-headed because it took more than one person to convince her about something. The more people, the more she got it. The less people, the less she would understand. As long as it didn’t have anything to do with fashion or the latest buys (or guys), Chevy was completely lost. Yeah, I know, I had an airhead for a friend. But you don’t understand, Chevy, Cheyenne and me have this connection that people can’t comprehend. We’re totally different people, worlds apart and—well, maybe Cheyenne and I relate a little more than Chevy—but still, Chevy is the kind of friend that makes the three of us keep balance. Yeah, I really do love her that much. But this morning she had turned up to be sadly annoying and I ended up looking like the complaining old grandma and Cheyenne’s going to completely hate me when I won’t tell her what she wants to hear—or what Chevy needs to hear—because, duh, my whole attention was on Cheyenne’s gorgeous step-brother, Harrison.61

“Um…I,” so I began, trying to figure out what to say. Sure, I know Chevy was jabbering the whole lunch, but I couldn’t lie either just to make Cheyenne happy. Seriously, I haven’t heard anything Chevy was saying. It was Harrison I’ve been listening to.62

“I don’t…know, Cheyenne. Quite truthfully, I wasn’t paying attention,” I replied, shamefully and Cheyenne was all I-needed-your-back-up-on-this-one-and-now-I-look-like-an-idiot. Hey, didn’t I look like the idiot ealier in English class? Seriously, that stare with her dark eyes was like I had betrayed her. Oh, but that’s not the end of it. I found Chevy giving me the exact same stare. Yeah, apparently I’ve done something wrong to her too. Um, didn’t she realize that I’ve just saved her skin; otherwise she’d have been something for Cheyenne to grind. So I was all: “what?”63

And she went: “wow, I didn’t know that my best friends hated to listen to me when I talk or they just didn’t bother to have me heard.”64

Wait! She was kidding right? I mean, seriously? She was looking at me when she said her last sentence. I was all ‘me?’ 65

I turned to look at Cheyenne for some answers because everything had gone…I don’t know, berserk? But instead, Cheyenne had her head in the air, not in the mood to do any talking. Oh boy, she was pissed! Well, that was nice, you know, because I was wet! And I needed to go to the bathroom to get myself sorted. And you can’t get yourself sorted with a disaster like that without your friends and the three of us were like…sort of disintegrating. No, no! that’s not the word. Well, you know what I mean, it was just chaotic.66

Chevy got up from her seat and I suddenly regretted everything that had happened. Maybe I should have lied and said that Chevy was getting all cranky because even if she would have been mad, I would have Cheyenne on my side, but now I was left with no one. I really needed to get the bathroom; I had only five minutes before lunch was over.67

“Where are you going?” I asked. Chevy tossed her hair and I saw those blues eyes brighten when she looked up, you know, all dramatic like.68

“I don’t know what’s the matter with you guys. As if it’s such a wrong thing to want an unforgettable prom,” she murmured, her voice sounding all Days of our lives-like.69

“I don’t know, maybe the both of you woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning,” she finished. That’s when Cheyenne and I shot her this astonished look, which she ignored and left us both, tossing her dark blonde hair in the interim. 70

The irony! Oh, the irony! But I was grateful for it because Cheyenne and I exchanged stares after Chevy was gone and we both had this look on both our faces that seemed to echo ‘Chevy, oh Chevy’ and that was a good sign because that meant we were on common ground. Now I had somebody to assist me to the lavatory. Seriously, how I was able to sit in a cafeteria full of Columbus students while I was all wet and soaky, is something I’m going to have to sit down and ponder over.71

“Oh, look you’re all soaked up,” Cheyenne noted, and that just made me happy. I wasn’t going to have worry about walking out those doors looking like a three year old who peed all over her pants.72

“Here,” she said, handing me her jacket, “cover yourself up with this, I think I have an extra pair of shorts in my bag I could lend you.”73

“God, Cheyenne! You like, seriously saved my life.”74

She seriously did, you know? I mean walking out the cafeteria like that would have been damage I’d be able to control. Yeah, I was willing to take the plunge if I had to. But, remember that Harrison was still around and he would see me, and that would mean I would never be able to see him—not the way that I have been praying for everyday of my life.75

Chapter 276

I sat in the library doing my homework, comfortable in Cheyenne’s shorts but I couldn’t stop thinking about Chevy. Poor Chevy, I felt so bad. The way things went to today was totally unnecessary. She left school holding a hot one for Cheyenne and I. I just wished I could call her and see how’s she was doing. If the prom meant so much to her, was it not mine and Cheyenne’s responsibility as her best friends to respect that? Sure, okay, maybe she had been a little too over board about it, but surely Cheyenne and I could have been more tactful. I mean, that’s what friends are all about, right: making things as easier and as less painful as possible, right? I sighed and dropped my pen on my sheet pad. I couldn’t work like this, I had to call Chevy and speak to her or forever hold my peace, no or regret it, or something.77

“Excuse me, is this seat taken?” I heard a guy ask me and without looking up, I said no. I pulled out my cell phone to make the call and found my battery dead. Wonderful! Well, then maybe I could call her when I get back home. I’d just stick around for the next hour, which is when the last school bus was coming up. I just had to concentrate on my homework, I couldn’t let minor friendship arguments get in the way of my school work…right? 78

“Damn it!” I sighed when I all was in vain. You owe me big time, Chevy! And she did, I mean since this morning, she’s the one who started it all.79

“Uh…are you okay?” the guy sitting opposite me asked oh so carefully like if he wasn’t cautious, I might explode. When I looked up to answer, my tongue got stuck. I just couldn’t say anything! My heart was racing miles, not allowing me to have enough air to utter a word. I had to show my tonsils you know, just to take in as much oxygen as possible, because seriously, that’s how much I had to open my mouth; that’s how much Harrison sucked the life out of me. He was sitting right opposite me, staring at me with his green eyes (oh those eyes), his eyebrows knitted together. I moved my mouth, but no word, not a single one. The only thing I could do was twirl my hair around my index finger.80

“Um,” was all I could manage with this very high pitched vibration; I swear I could sing along Pavarotti and pass as a soprano. Harrison blinked and his frown grew frownier so I covered my mouth, vowing not to say anything else because speaking seemed only to make me look like a dupe in front of him. My eyes grew bigger until they felt like they were going to pop out of my sockets. Harrison was packing his things.81

“Maybe I should go,” he decided, and without thinking, I shot my hand right out to catch his wrist.82

“No, don’t go! I mean, there’s no need. I’ll…” I pleaded breathlessly, but all I ended up doing was succeed in getting too clumsy all of a sudden. I mean, the books I was studying dropped from the table and the sheets of my pad went flailing about like a mini tornado passed by and wrecked it up and my pencils went clinking on the floor. I looked around dismally at the mess I caused and wanted to scream. I let go of Harrison’s wrist, still unaware that I had actually touched him. 83

“Great,” I squeaked. How did I make everything turn out like radioactive atom gone wrong? The other students looked at me disapprovingly, I could only respond with a shameful smile. Sorry, I mouthed. When I bent down to clean up, Miss Hall, the librarian, had already parked her two black stilettos under my nose. I knew it was Miss Hall, because, hello, her feet were a colorful network of veins stuffed in her oh already pale skin. Oh, and she’s the only one who parks stilettos under students’ faces.84

“Miss Larkin!” came her unpalatable hoarse of a croak. I looked up slowly, calculating the danger of the sight of her presence, which was directly proportional to the angle I lifted my head. When I achieved a well over ninety-degree angle, that I saw her thin brow arched so perfectly, I flashed her my megawatt smile. Yeah, I was sure my smile was so bright, I could supply the whole of Wintertton, New Jersey with electricity.85

“Yes, Miss Hall?” I answered. She brushed back her white hair with that bony hand, her piercing blue eyes still tearing away at my protective defenses. This wasn’t good! I mean, I really didn’t feel like being disciplined in front of Harrison, especially knowing how Miss Hall always has it in for me. It didn’t matter that I was an A student and always returned my library books on time; ever since that little incident since I started at Columbus, Miss Hall vowed that I’d never see the light of her day. Which hasn’t been a problem for the past few years, but oh, when she had the opportunity to make my life hell, she used it oh so well. (Excuse the rhyme, I’m not usually that rhythmic).86

“You just seem to always have a time and place for trouble, hmm?” she stated sardonically, a malicious smirk causing her cheeks to form drapery-like creases on the corners of her mouth.87

Oh no, what trick did the old lady have under her sleeve? All of a sudden, I felt this nostalgia that just came over me and I couldn’t explain why, but I thought I was going to go insane. CAN’T I JUST PACK MY THINGS AND GO HOME, MY KNEES ARE KILLING ME! Because I was kneeling for such long time, so I practically looked like a munchkin looking up at Miss Hall like that.88

“I meant no harm Miss Hall, it was a mistake,” I was close to tears. Seriously, I was beseeching the old lady. Yeah, I know, I’m pathetic! I mean she was being all piercing-eye eye staring at me and looked ready to devour. Poor Chloe’s such a baby; need to someone to rock my cradle. 89

Not!90

I something was happening, the whole room suddenly stopped and my (pathetic) emotions were at a standstill.91

“That’s right Miss Hall, it was a mistake. She was just trying to help,” said Harrison. My ears kept doing this replay on their own for like a gazillion times because I wanted to know if I had heard correctly. Was Harrison coming to my defense? After the monkey I had become, he was defending me? He was staring seriously at Miss Hall, being all diplomatic about it; it was like he was a captain reporting to an army official.92

“-It won’t happen again,” he said conclusively after a long silence. Miss hall stared at him suspiciously, but still her face was warm toward him. I couldn’t blame her; he had that charm of turning the hardest rock into the softest feather.93

“Very well then,” she surrendered, slightly disappointed that she hadn’t had a chance to enjoy her afternoon prey. It took Harrison to initiate a smile with his gleaming green eyes before Miss Hall hesitantly responded likewise and walked away with a dramatic glare at my direction. Phew, that was a close one! It happened so quickly though, cleaning the mess, I mean. I don’t remember when I did, it, but I had everything all sorted and the floor around the table I’d been working was clear and so was the table. See, I had to leave; I couldn’t sit down and carry on with my homework after I’d that little drama (that’s a lot of dramas for one day, really). My attention would be restlessly diverted (let’s not forget I still had Chevy to worry about), I would fidget so much and who knew if Harrison was going to fire me with a green stare and leave like the way he wanted to initially? Nope! Not going to happen.94

“Thanks,” I said when had my backpack hanging from my one shoulder. I was standing in front of Harrison, separated by the table between us. He shrugged, giving me a small smile from the one side of his mouth. I watched him, hoping that there was any sign of recognition from him. Three years kiddo! Come on. Didn’t he recognize me a bit? Or maybe he did know who I was but it wasn’t his bother.95

“No problem.” his voice was rich, like liquid chocolate running down my throat. My heart began to double-dutch, you know, doing that crazy thing it always did whenever I saw Harrison, let alone when he was so close to me or when I spoke to him.96

“Are you leaving cause I disturbed you? I didn’t mean to,” he apologized. Um, are you kidding me? Why did he apologize, didn’t he notice, I had been the troublemaker? I’m the one who should be apologizing. And his voice (oh his voice)! What can I say, the guy has a talent making me mellow; I’ll bet he did that with most people. When I noticed Harrison’s dark brow raising as he stared at me, I snapped out of my fantasy and concentrated. Okay, back to reality now. I went: “no, not at all. Actually I… was just…um, about to leave anyway…th-thanks, for what you did.” 97

Wow, how did I become so dehydrated all of a sudden? I just had a whole gallon of water about a half hour ago. Harrison’s gorgeous face smirked and I couldn’t help but smile—yeah, I really needed to leave. My first real conversation shouldn’t be with 98

“I didn’t do it for you. I did it ‘cause I wanted the old lady to go away. I mean, I’ve got work to do you know.” Then he ran his large hand through his hair and hit me with one last forced smile before settling on the chair and started reading his book. Yeah, a forced smile. (Wait! Did he just force a smile? Like curling those kissable lips but he didn’t want to? What did that mean?) He continued with his academic revising as if I wasn’t standing there smiling at the air. But notice that he called Miss Hall the same name I called her, the old lady. 99

I know, we have so much in common, it’s got to be fate.100

This is the real work starts. I come home and I have to cook for supper this evening. It was my week to cook so, as soon as I got to the kitchen, I wasted no time and got work taking out ingredients and kitchen equipment. I made a simple meal: mushroom ravioli with Greek salad and chicken gravy for ore flavor. Under compulsion (duh, do you think my fat brother would willingly take some responsibility), Joe helped me set up the table but do not be mistaken that this went without disorder. I had to demote myself to his puny mind and chase him about the table.101

“Joe, stop it. Joe!”102

His flabby belly bounced up and down as we merry-go-rounded the table. He was putting the entire cutlery in all the wrong places in the wrong order, on purpose.103

“I think dinner tables should have a new arrangement, don’t you,” he affirmed, but obviously there was nothing serious about what he saying he just did this to annoy me. Joe gets a kick out of abusing my patience. 104

“I think you should be sent to juvi,” I spat, still circling the table, longing to grapple him with my claws. Oh, I wanted to strangle him.105

“Ooh…!” he said in mock terror, wriggling his body at the same time. This was useless! I couldn’t force him to grow up at thirteen... if he just simply didn’t feel like it.106

“That’s enough both of you,” my father’s voice boomed, which without a second to lose, got mine and Joe’s attention. The merry-go-round had stopped. While I was leaning on my knee after that forced workout and caught my breath, Joe was as still as a statue (funny he was fatter than I could ever be, but he wasn’t panting). His eyes were wider than my mother’s hips. Good! Served him right.107

“Thanks dad. Joe—”108

“Joe nothing,” my dad snapped, his voice quiet but still loud to my ears.109

“Just grow up and have dinner ready. I’m trying to work on a case, but I can’t take you kids losing yourselves and causing a ruckus every single day!”110

The only thing I could hear was the cricket.111

That’s how silent it was. Nobody but my dad was allowed to a utter a sound.112

“Now keep it down, please,” he requested, totally different from the dictator he sounded like and was replaced with this soft man dad showed himself to be when he had a hard time rejecting me, his little girl. Just as Joe and I were about to do as dad had told us, my mom appeared behind him, her arms encircled around his waist. Even if my dad was melting us with his unshakable dark stare, I knew that deep down, he was melting at my mother’s touch.113

“What’s going on here? I was trying to meditate and I heard a noise. Everything okay?” she sang. She basically answered her own question already, I mean, the sound of her voice was like everything was hunky dory. 114

“No. it’s nothing, sweetheart. I’ve sorted it out with the kids,” dad said, smiling now. Joe mimicked him irritably, then set up the table as he was supposed to have done a century ago!115

At ten thirty, three hours after supper, I had finished my homework and dialed Chevy’s number on my phone right after that. It had been ringing for a decade but there finally was an answer when I was just about to hang up.116

“Hello,” Chevy’s voice chimed, just like this morning. Funny, I thought she was supposed to sound upset. So I hesitated, what was I going to say?117

“Uh, hi Chev. It’s me.”118

“Oh,” oh there it is, the upset sound, I mean, “Chloe. Why’re you calling me this late?”119

Okay, she was still mad at me. Because there has never been anything wrong with me calling Chevy at, say, two in the morning! And it was only like almost eleven. So how was I going to go about this?120

“Look, I’m sorry about lunch.” Okay, how about I go right into it. 121

“it wasn’t that I deliberately ignored or didn’t want to hear anything you were saying. It’s just that I was…you know, distracted.”122

I heard Chevy grovel; I could see her rolling her eyes.123

“All right. If you really mean it.”124

“I do." Chevy was probably lounging on a her queen size bed of only the finest linen, wearing a mink robe.125

“But Cheyenne should be the one calling me and asking for my forgiveness, she’s the one who told me ‘shut up’.” No, no, her eyes, are definitely rolling, I just know it. But that didn’t matter, what mattered was I settled things between Chevy and I and that made me glad. 126

“I’m sure Shy didn’t mean it Chev.” If my name were to be shortened, what would I say, Chlo? You know, like flow?127

“Fine,” Chevy sighed finally, eyes rolling too. We said our good-byes and hung up. That had gone as well as I had wanted it to go. Now my next instinct was to call Cheyenne and have a little pep talk and where possible without her so much as suspecting, find out what Harrison was doing. How about that? Nah, she was probably sleeping or had switched off her cell phone so she could paint and scribble about sketches uninterrupted. Well, that was okay. I’d see her at school tomorrow anyway, no emergency crisis situation or anything so…I’ll see her tomorrow.128

Only, I didn’t see Cheyenne the next day, because I was in art class (why did I take art? I guess I’m not that bad at it I realize three years ago) and Cheyenne never misses art class. I mean it’s the only morning class which ever comes early for (Cheyenne is not an early bird, she comes up late every first class), I mean come on, it’s art. Cheyenne’s one true love that will always take presence over any guy she ever dates. Now you don’t have to ask why she’s single. Well actually, all three of us were practically single anyway although I don’t know why Chevy was. She was blonde, blue-eyed, to-die-for-gorgeous legs and all the guys wanted her. She was supposed to be a cheerleader but instead, Chevy was stupid enough to be friends with serious and no-nonsense Cheyenne (but she can also be very sweet too) and as for me, well, I was just too boring. I mean I can’t bear the thought of going to the mall everyday and do nothing but shop all day or, if pockets were empty, doing window shopping on the latest fashions. Nope, not me, that was for cooky pea-brained Barbie dolls like cheerleaders. More Chevy’s thing. Although for cheerleader material, Chevy was a little smarter and more morally grounded. So there. I answered my own question—that’s why Chevy hung out with ‘social outcasts’ like Cheyenne and I. And, oh, remember the whole we’re very different so it balanced us together thing? Yeah, that too. Okay anyway, art class. We were kind of doing drawing this still life object placed in the middle of the class and we had to draw it (artistically of course) from the angle we were viewing it. I wondered why though since it was just a huge Grecian vase because, like duh, it was going to be the same shape at every angle. You know, all womanly shape-y. Seriously tell me, how many angles could you get of a merry go round? Very dim light bulb, huh? So Miss Franklin (the one holding the dim light bulb on the top of her head) came over to my desk and examined my work. I put my thumb outward (you how artist usually do when they hopelessly try to draw still life images one hundred percent accurate), pretending that I was so into it and it really touched my soul that I had to depict it perfectly.129

“That’s looking lovely Chloe,” Miss Franklin commended me in her impossibly soft voice. If this wasn’t art class (because every is quite since their attention is on the art), I wouldn’t even know she was talking. I smiled up at her, genuinely, even thought I thought but to a real artist, this was appalling. 130

“Thanks Miss Franklin,” I said.131

No offence, seriously, but Miss Franklin is no Leonardo da Vinci, I mean sometimes I feel like I’m doing fifth grade art. What more proof of that testament do you need when you have Cheyenne complaining to and she is a Leonardo da Vinci, seriously her work is one of the best I’d ever seen of my peers. Then the art class door opened and in waltzed and irritated-looking Cheyenne, her long raven hair so sleek and shiny against her dark expression. 132

“Sorry I’m late Miss Franklin. Car trouble,” she said in a low voice and walked over to give Miss Franklin her late note. Miss Franklin though was all smiles and sweet candy (she gets all zen because, according to her, you have to look after your chi) as she took the note from Cheyenne.133

“that’s okay Cheyenne. Juts take a seat and I’ll show you the exercise.”134

Cheyenne, of course, settle next to a free desk next to mine and had this black cloud hovering over her head. She took the piece of paper politely enough from Miss Franklin seeing as she was very agitated and took out her art equipment and began sketching the vase. Just like that, she was sketching it, like drawing a square.135

“Hello Chloe,” she greeted me in that same low voice she addressed Miss Franklin, her eye glued to the vase. I watched her, her hair looking so dark like it was a symptom of her emotions when she looked like she wanted to bite anyone who got in her way.136

“Hi,” I said, high pitched in a jovial (sarcastic) way. “Bad weather huh?”137

“Car trouble,” she replied, still toneless voice. And in no time, she had finished sketching the Grecian vase and might I say it look so…artistic. I couldn’t take my eyes off it, I wished I did something like that.138