He was a good boy. Everyone said so. His parents said so, and his teachers, and all of his many friends, and random people on the street would shout it as he walked by.1
"Hey," they'd say, "you're a good boy!"2
"I know," he'd say. "Everyone says that."3
If you asked him his name, he'd tell you it was Jake, but it was really Jacob Austin.4
Jake was seven and a half, which is a good age to be good. He lived with his mom and dad in a big house at the end of a nice street full of big houses. It was summer time and school was out, so Jake spent his days playing outside in the nice, warm weather. He caught frogs in the swamp behind his house, then he put them in a bucket, so he could play with them. Then, the next day, he'd let them go so he could catch more. After that, he'd play baseball with his dad, eat dinner, and learn about God.5
Jake's mom and dad were very religious. They put a picture of Jesus up in every room. 6
"If ever something is wrong," his dad told him sometimes, "or you need a friend, you can ask Jesus. He's always there, and he loves you very much."7
Jake liked Jesus. He even liked the stories his dad read him before bed from the bible, though not as much as some other stories, about He-Man or the Ninja Turtles. Those were more fun. But the stories the Shadow Man told him were even better yet.8
The Shadow Man was Jake's friend. They met one night when the Shadow Man crawled out from under Jake's bed.9
"Hi," he said, "you're a good boy."10
"I know," said Jake. "Everyone says that."11
"We will be friends," said the Shadow Man.12
"You have cool eyes," said Jake.13
They were yellow.14
After Jake's mom and dad tucked him in and kissed him goodnight, the Shadow Man came in from under Jake's bed and told him stories. This happened every night.15
Sometimes, people died in the stories. Sometimes, other things died. There were monsters and other spooky things and even other gods. Jake liked spooky things.16
"How would you like me to make you into a monster?" asked the Shadow Man.17
"That sounds fun," said Jake.18
"Go to sleep," said the Shadow Man. "It will be ok."19
And Jake did.20
When he woke up the next morning, his mom was dead. There was blood all over her room. Jake's dad was away on business, so he had to stay with his aunt. He missed his mom very much, and he stayed awake and cried for two whole nights when she wasn't there to tuck him in. During those nights, the Shadow Man told him stories. The last story he told during the second night was about Jake, and how Jake killed his mother.21
"But that didn't happen!" said Jake, and he cried.22
"Yes it did," said the Shadow Man. "Go to sleep. It will be ok."23
And Jake did.24
The next morning was Jake's mom's funeral. Jake's dad came home from business. He cried at the funeral. Jake did not.25
He listened to the Shadow Man's stories in his dreams that night. They were more like movies than just stories. Jake thought they were scary, but very neat.26
"I'm going to steal you tomorrow," said the Shadow Man, "but for now; go to sleep. It will be ok."27
And Jake did. 28
He didn't know what the Shadow Man had meant until the next day, when he woke up and saw that he'd been stolen.29
The Shadow Man was already awake inside Jake's stolen body. He laughed as he used Jake's teeth to tear into his dad's throat. But they weren't Jake's teeth, really. Jake could tell. They were long, and sharp, and they hurt his mouth. They were teeth like the Shadow Man told him about in his stories. He felt his clothes get wet with his dad's blood, and he hoped he wouldn't pass a mirror.30
"Go to sleep," the Shadow Man told him. "It's ok."31
But Jake couldn't sleep. It wasn't ok. He wanted to sleep so, so badly, but all he could do was scream, and scream, and scream, though no sound came out of his stolen mouth.32
"Jesus!" he screamed. "Jesus! Help me!"33
Jake fell asleep, eventually, and he dreamed he was in a good place. A man in a red shirt, like his dad's Christmas sweaters, was there waiting for him. 34
"Hello," said the man, "you're a good boy."35
"I know," said Jake. "Everyone says that."36
"You should be part of my world," said the man.37
"Do you mean Heaven?" asked Jake. "Are you Jesus?"38
"Kind of," said the man. "My name is the Red King."39
"Oh. Do I have to be a monster?" asked Jake.40
"No. Of course not," said the Red King. "What would you like to be?"41
Jake thought about it, and he decided on a mouse. His mom used to read him stories about a mouse. Mice never hurt anyone.42
"That's fine," said the Red King. "Your name is Doormouse, now. Go play in my garden."43
Jake had a birthday party every day after that, but he wasn't awake for most of them. 44
"Go to sleep," whispered the Shadow Man from afar. "It's ok."45
And it was.46
.The End.47
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
-
Floored completely and totally floored! I always thought that there were darker things in Wonderland, this proves it! I disagree with Belle however there doesn't need to be seduction oe sex of any sort to make this a best seller. The verbage is perfect, your character creation is awesome and I have yet to read anything here that I have enjoyed as greatly. Of course this is related to one of the greatest stories ever written.
I can't wait to read the complete story. Hurry up will ya?
Yours,
April -
When I was young, I seem to recall a particularly terrifying dream/incident in which a man made entirely of shadow informed me that he was going to make me into a monster.
This children's story is about that. -
this was very interesting, Where did you get the idea for this? I liked it a lot.
-
I like this story a lot. Its better than the other ones I have read of yours. The one that mimics Alice in wonderland is good too, but this one is better. Tho' like I told you before its too creepy for children. It's not really the children you would have to worry about, but the parentals and critics if you were to actually have this published as it is. I think you should add more to it and make it more of a grotesque fairytale for adults. Maybe Jake should be seduced by a nymph. ^__^



