She took a shaky breath, struggling to hold back her tears, but they came anyways.1
She sat in her dark room reciting the words again and again.. "It's over." 2
"How could he do this to me!?" 3
She thought to herself as another tear drop rolled down her face.4
"After so long! Why?!?" 5
Lora was longing to be by his side one last time. Next to him, touching his tender lips with one sweet kiss, one last time, as they had shared so many times before. 6
"How will I live without him? He was everything to me. Without him I am nothing!"7
He had been there by her side when her dad left in the middle of the night drunk-- again. He was there when they got the call from the police department telling her and her mother that her dad was in an accident and didn't make it. He was there when her mom couldn't take it anymore, and started drinking, just as her father had. He was there for her, he comforted her, he whispered in her ear so many times "everything will be alright." 8
"He will regret what he did to me! He will see, how much he is without me, how much he misses me!" She yelled in the silence of her room. But in reality, she knew that he would never want her back, those words, the conversation, haunting her,9
"Hey, umm we need to talk"10
"Well that never leads to anything good," she said with a nervous laugh.11
"I'm serious."12
"Ok, Josh, what is going on?"13
"Well so much is going on in your life right now, and I feel that you will get through this better without me, you need to learn how to deal by yourself, I won't always be there to comfort you"14
"But Josh! You don't really mean it do you?!"15
"It's over."16
"JOSH!!" The line was dead- he had hung up. 17
It seems as though just yesterday they had shared their first kiss on the moonlit beach. It seems as though just yesterday they were laughing, dancing in the middle of the street while it rained. It seems like just yesterday they were telling each other everything, spilling there souls to each other.18
"Learn how to deal," she thought.19
"How in the hell am I supposed to do that!?" She screamed as she ran to the phone, dialing Josh's number.20
Josh was sitting in his room, he knew that she would call, but he just sat there,and let the answering machine get it.21
" Hey you've reached Josh, I'm not here right now, leave a message after the beep" .....Beeepp.....22
"Damn it Josh! Why are you doing this to me!? I need you!! Can't you see!?"23
Josh just sat on his bed, and a tear dropped out of his eye, and he walked over to the machine, and turned it off, knowing that this wasn't the only call he was going to make to her. 24
"It's for the best"he said aloud to himself as if someone was supposed to hear, or rather to comfort and reassure him. He sighed, and turned the lamp off and went to bed.25
6:00AM The alarm was buzzing, and she slammed her fist on to the clock, she was already awake, unable to sleep at all last night. 26
She walked over to the dresser and looked into the mirror. Her normally ocean blue eyes, where looking grey and puffy. Her normally California sun-kissed skin was pale and white. Her long wavy hair was all tangled up and knotted by the continuous tossing and Turning in then night. 27
She threw on a pair of sweats, not caring what she looked like, she grabbed the keys of the counter and slammed the house door after seeing her mother passed out on the couch with the tv turned up way loud, and a empty 12 pack of Bud Lite. 28
On the way to school, she managed to put on a pale pink gloss, hoping to look at least half way decent.29
She pulled into the parking lot of the school, grabbed her book bag and trudged up the steps of the stupid high school, the last place she wanted to be right now. As she grabbed the book bag, she remembered that she had trig. homework and forgot to do it, not like it would matter, she was failing that class anyways.30
As she walked through the halls, everyone was staring at her. She tried to hold her head high, but every corner she heard something more terrible..31
" Oh I heard that her boyfriend broke up with her because she had mental problems" "No wonder she looks so bad" 32
"Her mother got fired from her job because she came to work drunk" "oh what a poor child"33
Even the teachers were jumping to conclusions! By lunch time, she had heard almost everything! She couldn't handle it, she didn't know what to do. 34
The end of lunch bell had rang and everyone was heading inside to their classes. She ran down the hall, out the doors, and to her car. Josh saw her and tried to call after her, "Wait!" "Don't" he shouted, but it was to late. She was already in the car speeding down the highway. 35
He jumped into his jeep and sped after her, but she was far ahead of him. 36
She had driven to the coast, a dangerous place were there were very risky cliffs, and a wide open sea below. One jump and everything would be over. She had gotten out of her car and ran to the edge of the tallest one there. It had gotten windy outside and the waves were choppy. 37
"Don't do it, we can work things out," Josh said.38
"YOUR LYING TO ME! You don't love me, you don't mean it!"39
"I can change your life," he promised in a throaty whisper.40
"SHUT UP!!" She yelled, "YOU DON'T MEAN IT!" 41
"Please, we can get through this, I will help you," Josh said, trying to comfort her. 42
She was crying now, each tear, rolling down her face, and into the dark choppy sea. 43
Josh took a step closer, his arms open now "Please, come down!"44
she was rocking back and forth, her eyes closed, saying "leave me alone, please, you don't mean it, how could you do this to me!?"45
She fell back... Josh ran close and grabbed her hand, pulling her back up, as she screamed. 46
She was safe, he had pulled her back up, off the cliff, and into his jeep.47
He cradled her in his arms and whispered one last time " Things will get better, I promise"
Author notes
My name is tearrsofthemoon
also known as Jocelyn.
I am 19.
My favorite color is rainbow. 
A contest entry
- "My STORYWRITE Friends" by rinzu.
175 points, ends November 10, 43 entries
• next story in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest - Going Under by Just Falling Apart.
350 points, ended August 19, 16 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Love and Promises by Eddie.
600 points, ended August 8, 55 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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Awww it was sweet! The emotion was wonderful and the details made it like a normal girls life. I really liked it! Good luck in my contest!
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Its really good there is some strong emotion in it and i like how you put everythingtogether great job and good luck in mycontest
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Amazing.... you did a wonderful job on this!
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I think you captured the aftermath of a break-up very well. How Lora wasn't expecting it and everything. I liked how she kept asking questions...what did I do, why did he do this?
I also think that Josh was written well...but were his intentions good? I think they were...I thought it was a bit harsh when it turned out that he said it all over the phone...wasn't expecting that...
For a minute I actually though you'd actually end it with her jumping off the cliff...luckily it was a happy one. Liked this.
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A very thoughtful story. For some, this is a very real part of their lives, and I think you captured a lot of the emotions very well.
I wouldn't know much about the girl's perspective, but I can totally understand where Josh is coming from. He only wants what's best for Lora, even if it's not necessarily what makes her happy. That takes a lot of character to do, and you wrote it very well.
My only tip would be to make the dialogue a little more natural. Most people talk with contractions. Instead of saying 'what is,' say 'what's.' It may not be grammatically correct some of the time, but it adds another layer of realism to the story.
All in all though, this was very well done. Great job.
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Very Good
This triggers some of my emotions. i love the fact that it
s romantic. I'm a sucker for romance stories. You def. captured my attention at first, because when it started off I had no idea what was going on, which made me want to read it to find out, do to the fact it was something tragic because she was talking to herself, and clearly, she was upset. It's be nice to know the name of the girl though. I don't believei t's mentioned in there.
beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
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Very interesting... I like the sudden suspense and depression, as well as slight insanity in this write. Very good. :3
Good luck in my contest. -
I liked this story a lot even though it was very sad and depressing. Great job, you should continue it! Thanx for entering my competition
Good luck!
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Did you feel so sad you wanted to die? ;]
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Hehehehe, yeah I geuss so. It was full of deep emotion.
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Heart rendering,
honestly it just glows with emotion from every possible area i felt every single line. it was so beautiful and very gripping.
well done, great write and keep it up!!
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Oh girly, I loved this. God, right at this moment, I too am going through the same thing. Just because I'm not completely sane doesn't mean I can't love. And believe me, you need love to get through things like that. But the person I love refuses to know me, and they lefted me to fight alone. Being alone is the hardest thing after being in love. Your story shows us this. I hope more great work like this comes from you. Good luck.
~Hidders~ -
wow!! this was really good, i know how the girl feels, im feeling it right now, im dealing with a bad break up, and im hurting heaps!! but this comment shouldnt b about me, it should be about what a great start to this story that i hope ur going to continue!!
~DaNi~ -
Beautiful
This poem shows so much pain, love & passion. It sends chills down my spine to think of the reality of it all, its threatening. I love it! -
I thank you for entering a new entry. I really appreciate the extra effort you were willing to put into it, and I will reward that somehow.
and Thank you for commenting on my work, you where one of the few contestants who actually found the time to read and comment on my work. I really appreciate it and I think it shows character! 
about the story; this was extremely sweet and sad and I somehow wonder what is going to happen next. You had a sort of flow through it that you normally find in poems..
Sorry for the delay in judging but I’m thankful you entered my contest..
Love
Sam
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This is very good. some parts of it sound almost like a poem. i agree... definitely needs a sequel. ^_^
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This left me wanting more. What happens next? Will Josh really stay with her, will he be true to her? Good luck in the contest. This was awesome. Great story! Now write a sequel.
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OMG!!!!!!! Very nice. Very nice. I dont know how you do it. You have a gift. Thank you for sharing. Bolt.
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