Suicide's Homicide

Before you read on, be aware that there is vulgar language that is presented. Please read at your own risk.1

Sweat dripped from her forehead. Her wrists were bound tightly behind her head. The black mass of her hair lay frazzled about. Her breathing was labored as she pushed her hips up roughly into his, savoring the depth it reached him to. She could feel his lips on her neck, his hands burning their prints into her breast as they played with the soft lumps of flesh. A quiet whimper followed a satisfied groan as he withdrew himself from her.2

Opening her eyes, Aurora watched as William dragged his naked form across the room. The digital clock on their dresser read two in the afternoon. He was due to classes in an hour. “Liam, I’m not done.” It all came out as an unsatisfied whimper; her hazel eyes searching his dark brown orbs. When he didn’t reply, Aurora wiggled her hips to get his attention. “I’m not finished.” She muttered when he looked back at her, now fully dressed.3

His gaze was icy and sent shivers down her spine. “You can finish yourself off, I need to get ready.” Biting down on her bottom lip, Aurora weighted her options.4

“Could you at least remove the handcuffs?” the expression she received from William told her that his answer was going to be a no. And it was just that. Frustrated and still wet from when he left her, Aurora just rested her head on the pillow that was beneath her. She heard William leave the room and rummage around a bit. When he crossed back over the threshold of their bedroom, she could only see the pen and piece of paper he carried in one hand it wasn’t until she saw him drop the paper on her slightly curved tummy that she noticed the pistol in his other hand. “Liam…?” she questioned him nervously.5

A sadistic smile found its way to his lips. The look in his eyes told Aurora this wasn’t her sweet William she met back in just her junior year of high school anymore. This was a monster. Placing the pistol firmly to her temple, William commanded she take the pen and paper. “My darling Aurora, you are about to write you suicide note.” It didn’t even sound like his voice. As he told her what to write, she quickly scribbled on the paper messily. She added in her own blessings and words; apologizing to everyone she loved dearly.6

'My loving family,' she wrote, her script fuzzy and hard to read.7

'I fear that I must write you as to why I have done this horrible deed to myself. It has been my lack of love and inspiration for life that has driven me to the point of insanity. Every day I went on like this, praying that it would somehow take a different route; maybe become clearer in my mind as to why I am wanted on this earth. But alas, I could not find that reason.'8

On Aurora wrote, adding the tiniest of detail William didn’t tell her to write. It seemed like forever as he told her to add this or make sure she wrote that. Tears threatened to spill over and down her cheeks as she kept on writing. She knew what topic she needed to become known next.9

'William does not know I have planned to rid myself of this world. He has been my dearest love and strongest supporter from the day we met. He knew my past and was not afraid to take that and love me for more than I am. What none of you know – especially my dear William – is that I am was pregnant. After weighing my options, as well as the ones that concerned our child, I cannot fall from the still-rising depression…10

Mother, I know William wanted this baby girl inside of me as much as I wanted her. But I could not keep her whilst getting rid of myself. I was just barely eight weeks along. She wouldn’t have survived without me.11

To my William, you did not do this to me for I did it to myself. You did not hand me the gun and tell me to shoot myself in my head…12

On her letter went to tell of past memories she missed. Of past lovers who she had scorned because they had messed with her life. If it weren’t for him, mother, I may just still be here at this moment. I may be alive, anticipating the birth of my daughter. Of William’s daughter. If he hadn’t thrown me farther into that well, I may have had the strength to get out and recover. The tears finally began to spill over as she tried her hardest to contain her vision to finish up the letter William recited to her. The pen was wobbly, but she remained silent as she listened to her lover’s hate-filled words towards her.13

Mother, I am so sorry I took the coward’s way out. It was probably shameful finding me lying there with my clothes removed and a bullet shot through my head. To my unborn darling angel, Mommy is sorry that she had to rid the world of a presence not yet known. You would have excelled in everything. I give my love to all of you. Let my soul rest with you at night. Protect you all from harm, especially those who I cared about most. You are all my shining stars. To all the love that I received, I give back to you, for all the years we got to cherish and spend. My family, my friends, my love, I love you all so dearly.14

Aurora Melinda'15

Aurora bit her lower lip as she signed the letter with her birth given name. She looked up at William and pleaded with him to come to his senses. Her muttered pleas fell on deaf ears. What else could she do? “Aurora,” Liam softly began. For a moment, it sounded like his voice. There may have been hope still. “You are going to wait until I reach my car.” His voice was back to being cold and flat. It showed off no emotion. His eyes grew fierce with his continuation of what he wanted her to do. “When you hear my engine start, you are going to pull that trigger and shoot yourself.” The sadistic smile flew back onto his face. “And if I don’t hear that gun shot, I swear to God I will come up here and kill you myself.”16

All the poor girl could really do was sit there and not at his response. Aurora watched his footsteps until there were out of the room. [i]I can’t do this… what about the baby?[/i] The question rattled off in her head. [i]He wanted her. He told me he wanted her.[/i] But still, she looked at the gun. She hesitated before she brought it to her right temple. [i]I love you my William. And I love you my angel.[/i] It was the last thing she thought.17

William bound down the stairs quickly with a smile proudly placed on his face; smug that his plan was going to be effective and that it fell right into place. He would get the house; he would get her money; he would also relieve himself from her. Closing the door, he locked it like he and Aurora would do every day and he went to his Grand Prix. “Good morning William.” The old woman that lived across the street from them stuck her head out of the garden. Her face was covered in wrinkles that told of past stories. Growing up as a teenage with her first love. And a marriage that lasted up until her partner passed away just under a year ago. Aurora and Liam had attended the funeral service for him. William gave a friendly smile to the old woman and gave her a pleasant hello back. “Where is Aurora today, out sick?” She questioned out of genuine curiosity.18

“Yes. Ro came down with a small bug. She’s been throwing up for the past few days. She called out of work this morning.” The woman gave him a kind smile and bit the man adieu. “Have a nice afternoon, Mrs. Hayes.” Opening the door, he got in and took out his keys. Starting his ignition, he waited a few brief seconds before he growled out loud and got back out. He didn’t hear the gun shot. “Shit.” He muttered a little louder than was necessary so that it seemed he had misplaced something he needed before classes started. When he looked at Mrs. Hayes, he chuckled and said, “I forgot my Writing notes” before going back inside.19

Closing the deep oak door of their house, he raced up the stairs, fuming that she had not done what he commanded. Crossing the doorway to their room, he went over to the bed and pulled Aurora’s black hair roughly. “What the fuck, Aurora?” William screamed at her. “I told you to shoot yourself when you heard the engine start.”20

Aurora was inches to being in hysterics. “I can’t do it.” She told him. “I just can’t kill myself, Liam. I’m past that speed bump in my life. William's brown eyes grew black with rage. Letting go of her hair, he took the gun from her frail fingers and pushed the barrel of the pistol deep into her temple. “That hurts…” she whimpered to him. That brought on another fit of rage as he began to pull the trigger. But he stopped. He had to make her do it. He had to make it look like she committed suicide. He tossed the gun on the bed between her legs for the time being.21

Through grit teeth, William responded. “I don’t fucking care. You are to shoot yourself you damn bitch.” Taking a deep breath, William continued on with his rant. “I can’t believe I dealt with you this long. I let you take over me, turn me into your slut, and use mw. Why did I let myself get this deep in feelings for a cunt? You’re a slut, Aurora. It’s all you’ll ever amount to. All you want is sex. What happened to love?” Tears poured in rivers down Aurora’s cheeks as angry tears threatened to present themselves in Liam. “Just a goddamn cunt…” William muttered angrily before he retold her to shoot herself.22

Still, Aurora tried to hang on tight with the two words she’d been telling him. “I can’t.” For a long while, she just took the pain, letting him call her all of the nasty words he told her – calling her useless, a whore, a cunt, a nuisance to life all around. All the while, all she kept saying was “I can’t; I’m sorry.” Suddenly, she couldn’t take it from him anymore. All the things he was saying to her. All the things he must have meant. Finally, Aurora gave it. With red eyes and tear-stained cheeks, Aurora used her feet to grab the gun and placed in on her stomach just above her womb. “Fine Liam… I’m a cunt. I got it. I’m a whore; I’m useless. I’ll finish myself off like you asked me to.” With that, Liam gave a hearty smile once more and handed her the gun. He left the room once more and walked down the stairs without ever looking back at his girlfriend. He dug in his pocket and took out a small box. Opening it, it held a ring. He was going to ask her to marry him, but that was all in the past now. He shut the door once more and locked it. He had spent twenty minutes arguing with the bitch and was going to make him late. He’d be on time if he sped just a bit though. He put the key back into the ignition. Turned it on slightly so he could hear the radio and look at the time. Half past two. William turned his car on fully and only moments later, heard the gun shot. With a smirk, he got out of his car. Looking behind him, he saw Mrs. Hayes come out from her garden, a worried look on her face. William figured this would be the best time to act out the grieving boyfriend and turned his smirk into a concerned look. Leaving his car on, he dashed for the door once more.23

“Aurora!” he screamed. Feeling the old woman right on his tail, he raced up the stairs to quickly remove the handcuffs from his ex-lover. Hearing the footfalls of Mrs. Hayes, William screamed Aurora’s name as if he had just found her. He began to cry and slumped over his dead girlfriend, pulling out the ring and placing it neatly on her finger. Then he just sat there, holding Aurora in his arms as if she were still alive and comforting her. “Ro, please… please don’t be dead.”24

He heard the frightened gasp of the woman standing behind him. The tears that had threatened to fall earlier made their way down his cheeks. “Oh dear… William, I’m so sorry honey.” Letting go of the dead girl, he walked over to Mrs. Hayes with a bloodstained shirt. He welcomed the genuine hug and concern. “Why would the poor girl do this to herself?” All Liam could do was shrug. When the old woman finally let go, he grabbed the phone and called for an ambulance. He then called Aurora’s mother and then her brother.25

It was then that he grabbed the note with her fuzzy script from writing in the air. His eyes skimmed over the note, looking much like he had told her to write it. Until he got to one part. “S-she was pregnant…” he said, sheer genuine breaking through his mask. He had killed his daughter. At the voicing over the death of his unborn child, the elderly woman moved over to Liam’s side. The tears became real. The guilt became real. The loss and sadness all became authentic. The mask William had held over his features had dissolved.26

He heard the sirens of the ambulance and police arriving. Not soon after, Aurora’s family came to comfort the grieving man. They had learned of his daughter that Aurora had been carrying. He watched the love he was killed be taken away from him. He felt disconnected from what was happening now and searched for a time they had been both happy. It had been hard, but he went all the way back to their high school prom and graduation. From that time to the first year living together, they were both happy – content – with each other. They both were carefree and finally became more comfortable around one another – Aurora more than William. She could say things she never could when they were still in high school, making love with each other in her bed. She had come so far… and he took it all away because he was selfish. With only a few sentences and name-callings. His lover’s suicide… turned out to be a double homicide no one would find out about. Ever.