Synopsis1
Jerry Brent wakes in the early hours and turns over to make love to his fiancée, only to discover she is dead. Her throat is cut. Her naked body is still warm against his. His fingers are curled around an open razor lying next to her. Climbing out of bed, he quickly dresses. Stepping over beer cans strewn across the floor, he lights a cigar. 2
There are voices outside in the hallway of the hotel room. He presses his ear to the oak-panelled door – he can just make out the words: I’m sure it was a scream. Jerry, close to panic, crosses to the window and opens it. He looks down at the street below. He estimates a twelve-metre drop. His recent recovery of a broken ankle would not withstand the impact. Then he scrambles for his mobile ‘phone in his jacket on the bed, beside her bloody body.3
He makes a call, hanging on, cursing the answering service. Suddenly there is a voice in the earpiece. Jerry feels a surge of relief. Captain says he will bring him enough cash to be able to flee the country.4
Jerry crosses back to the door and listens carefully, straining his ear for any telltale sound. Nothing. He sits down and relights his cigar. He inhales deeply. He inspects his watch: 3:35am. Jerry looks over at her. He slowly gets up and edges towards her. He pulls back the sheet just as there is a knock at the door. He freezes, choking back an urge to call out. A voice invades his head. The door opens and the owner of the voice steps inside. Jerry is caught standing over the body.5
Jerry breathes a sigh of relief, as Captain drops his rucksack to the floor on closing the door. He locks it. Jerry is puzzled as to why anyone should want to kill her. Who got in so quietly? And who murdered her? 6
The Captain advises they should hide the body, and quietly leave via the back staircase.7
Outside, Jerry remembers holding the razor. He has to get back to the room and wipe away his fingerprints. The door they passed through only opens from the inside and is now firmly shut. He is halfway down the drainpipe as a police patrol car slowly approaches. He drops to the ground and runs, closely followed by Captain who hands over a bag containing money and a change of clothes. Both men go their separate ways.8
Jerry needs to call on Trudi.9
Daybreak is threatening to expose him. He raises his collar and hurries along the deserted street, slipping into empty doorways every now and then to avoid attention. Suddenly a police patrol car pulls up level with him. Jerry turns his back and lights a cigar. They pull off.10
Trudi’s flat is close by. He knocks at the door: no answer. He pushes at it. It opens. He steps inside and calls her name. He walks into her bedroom. Trudi is lying on her back with her arms flopped over her head. Jerry rushes over to her. She does not respond. He places her arms by her side and is about to cover her face. She screams and kicks out at him.11
Jerry explains her door is open and of his dead fiancée. He says that she herself could be next. The lights are turned on. Standing in the corner of the room is an enemy neither Trudi nor Jerry would want to see again. John Brown.12
John has left a trail for the police that will lead them to Trudi and Jerry. John is back, after ten years in jail for a bank raid. He is back to collect his share of the money.13
Jerry has been framed for his fiancée’s murder, and is about to be a scapegoat for Trudi’s. John points the gun at Trudi’s head. He slowly squeezes the trigger then topples over, firing aimlessly as his body hits the floor. Trudi and Jerry stare at the uniformed assassin standing in the doorway: Captain crosses to the body which jerks when another bullet is fired into the head. Now it is £7,000,000 to be split two ways, when Trudi can no longer conceal she was instrumental in the murder of Jerry’s fiancée.
Comments
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Wow your good at story writting, me I cant even go there. But Im curious about this one, why name it Vendetta? and how will John get the money if everyone is dead or in jail?
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I'm sorry but while the story idea and plotting are grand--you have a bit too much detail for either a query letter or a book proposal.
Thanks for entering and I would like to read your novel.


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Vendetta
Hi Gerifitzsimmons, thanks for your contest and your time to read my entry. Good luck and happy writing!
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