By Geri Fitzsimmons2
“Come on Mitch, it’s gonna be daylight in a few hours. Let the Animal Control do their job. I’m beat.”3
One yellowcoat grumbled to another. They were getting close. I couldn’t fly. I couldn’t run. If they swung those lights a bit this way, they’d see me sure—I’d be done for. The trembling started again and I couldn’t stop it.4
“You take off Gil. I’m going to hunt a little while longer.”5
“Christ, Mitch. That bird was in a bad way. He might have crawled into a hole and died like those baby rats we found. Even if he didn’t get burned, the smoke was bad. You’d think an Eagle would be too smart to nest on a roof.”6
They’d stopped walking and their lights swung the other way. Maybe they wouldn’t spot me cowering here in cold darkness. My nose was stuffy and it hurt not to sneeze. Every little bit of me hurt. My empty belly ached and my dry throat burned. So scared, cold and tired, I could only lie there and tremble.7
The light started to swing back towards my hiding spot. Run! My mind begged but my legs just couldn’t obey. I closed my eyes tight, hid my snoot beneath my crippled wing to masks the whimpers, and waited to be captured. The light flashed above me and settled on the far side.8
“Lets try along the fence over there. We’ll follow it around. We’ll make one more sweep, then call it.”9
They moved off and soon their footfalls faded and the night became quiet—frighteningly still. I couldn’t hide the whimpers. But my throat was so sore they settled into very weak whines.10
‘Hummm.’11
The voice startled me. My eyes stared into the darkness. I couldn’t move. 12
Its beady little black eyes spotted me.13
‘A Weirdcat!’ I yelped. Normally I could have taken the predator. Made a fine meal of it. But my wings were broken from the horrible explosion that cast me out of my nest and threw me to the ground. My talons were caked in mud from running on the soggy earth. My sharp beak had a crack on one side.14
She stretched her long gray form out to its full length on sift legs and swished that ropey tail. ‘Don’t call me that—my name is Riona and I’m not a cat, let alone a weirdcat. We are called rodents. ’15
She was definitely smaller than me, but the shape I was in her sharp teeth and her formidable claws appeared scary now. When she didn’t instantly attack, I purposed a deal. ‘Riona, I’ll quit calling you weird cat. In fact I’ll ignore you completely if you like.” 16
‘Well, you don’t appear to be in any shape to dictate terms.’ Her long snout curved upward on one side. ‘But seeing as how I’m feeling a bit vulnerable myself after that wretched house blew up, I agree.” She shook herself then gave me a once over. ‘Can you walk?’17
‘Not very fast.’ I struggled up on my shaky legs. ‘Nor very far. I’m awful thirsty and hungry.’18
‘Come on then,’ she said. ‘I know where we can get some water and maybe something to eat. It’s not far.’19
And it wasn’t. She led me around the corner of the fence where the yellowcoats had gone. At first I held back and warned her that the men were there.20
‘They wouldn’t go into someone’s backyard,’ she assured me. ‘And all the fire trucks are gone now.’ She hustled to a bucket of water beneath a long gray pipe. She leaped up and stood on the edge. ‘Well?’21
I stood up against the bucket and stretched as far as I could but couldn’t reach the top. I decided that if I waited for her, I would stay thirsty while she drank her full. Limited by my inability to fly, I jumped hard against the bucket. It wobbled and I caught a splash that filled my mouth. It tasted great as it cooled my throat. I jumped again and Riona fell in the bucket squealing. Next time when I jumped I pushed with all my might. The bucket toppled, Riona was free, and I had a pool of water to suck up.22
Riona kept leaping in the air, spinning about and shaking water from her fur while snarling at me. I just kept lapping the water.23
She finally settled down. ‘I nearly drowned,’ she accused.24
I had found a patch of dry grass and rolled about clearing the wet mud from my feathers. ‘That’s why I knocked the bucket over, so you could get out.’ 25
‘You shouldn’t have rocked it to begin with.’26
‘And how was I suppose to get a drink? I didn’t expect you to slip and fall in.’27
‘Slip!’ Riona sputtered, her beady eyes flashing in the rising sunlight. Expecting a few a painful nips, I covered my head with my wings and crouched down. Apparently she had other things on her mind and so allowed the argument to die. ‘Let’s check out the Mason’s garbage,’ she said. ‘Sometimes I find treats there. Found a whole chicken once. Hurry up. We don’t have much time before the humans are up and we have to find a place to hide.’ She ran off towards the backyard.28
When I caught up. Riona had managed to find a way under the garbage pail cover and I could hear her rummaging about inside. Suddenly she poked her head out. ‘You’ll be thrilled,’ she said. ‘The Mason’s had chicken for supper. The bones are in here with a bit of meat still attached.’29
I almost said, ‘How do I get them.’30
When she said, ‘Try your muscleman stunt again.’ and jumped from the pail.31
I leaped against the pail. It didn’t even wobble. I tried, and tried, but got no place. Riona had claimed a bag of salad and was busy devouring it. It looked like her promise of meat and bones would remain only a vision to taunt my empty stomach. Once she finished eating Riona might get fed up with my efforts, and take off. Still hungry, I knew I had to follow her or be caught by the yellowcoats. I sensed Riona was saying, ‘Dopey, dopier, dopiest,’ and was grateful I couldn’t hear it.32
Riona tossed her empty bag away. Looked at me and starting with her head, shook herself. She took a running leap and landed back in the pail. Then a chicken bone came flying out. I gabbed it and tore at the meat. Never had anything tasted so good. Another came flopping on the ground and I deserted the now naked bone to start on the fresh offering. By the forth one, I got picky and ignored it to grab the fleshier fifth. 33
‘Bring it with you.’ Riona leaped on to the ground and with a piece of corner cob tight between her teeth took off running.34
“SON OF A BITCH!”35
A rock came sailing through the air. ‘Yip!’ It grazed my rump. I dropped my bone.36
“Precious!” He yelled.37
The female that came bounding out the door, in size, rivaled the male who was screeching and tossing stones at me. They were rounded like twin garbage cans and not a whole lot taller. Brownish-gray sprigs of hair stood straight out from clumps on their heads and I might have paused for a chuckle but I didn’t have time. A stone stroked the tip of my ear. I grabbed my bone and fled after Riona. 38
My legs were pumping air as fast as they could in my terror. I rounded the fence and nearly ran into Riona. She stood there with the corncob between her paws; her snoot wide-open and the oddest sound coming out. ’gggggrrrouf.’39
I think she was trying to laugh. I set my bone down to catch my breath.40
‘Nearly gotcha, did they?’ Riona said.41
‘No thanks to you.’42
‘Face it, you’re an endangered species. Worse they’d do if they caught you is maybe administer a swift kick then place a call to Animal Control. Me, I’m a rat. I’d get a quick execution. Tubby Tim keeps a shovel beside the house. He got my sister in the neck with it. Chopped her head right off.’ She picked up her food and started to walk again. I retrieved my bounty and trotted after her.43
‘You got a name?’44
‘Edgar,’ I said.45
She snickered. ‘Well, Edgar if you want to survive another day, we’re going to have to find you some place safe. This neighborhood has its share of four legged predators.’46
Before long I realized where she was headed. I nearly deserted. The smell from smoke and wet wood gagged me. I hurried up to Riona. Dropped my bone and whispered, ‘This is the house that blew up.’47
‘And sure, the perfect place to hide. We can sleep without concern. No humans will return today. And when it gets dark we can start hunting a new home.’48
‘But it stinks.’49
“It won’t be too bad in my cellar.’ Riona crawled through a broken window. Reluctantly, I followed. She raced across the floor, and I scurried after her still clutching my bone. The sunlight coming through the windows, made it easy to see. If that crazy rat wasn’t scared why should I be?50
Author notes
It's probably toooo long, so if you DQ it I'll understand. You know me--I can't say "Good Morning" in two words
. But I was having some fun with animals and your contest inspired me.
Geri
A contest entry
- WHERE EAGLES DARE! by condor.
1600 points, ended January 25, 5 entries
Honorable mention
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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The first few paragraph's of this story wrenched my heart. I was literally holding back tears as I read it, I nearly didn't make it through. I really felt Edgers fear and desperation. There is nothing more gutting than hearing about an animals suffering at the hands of man because they are the symbol of pure innocence.
I will admit when Riona was introduced I became a little confused as I wasn't sure who or what she was. I thought for a minute it may have taken a turn towards Animorph tone and I'm rather glad it didn't. It wasn't until you actually said Riona was a rat that I finally went "oooooh".
I love the concept, and I think with a little TLC it could really develop into an interesting story (hard to find a target audience though, too dark for kids but animal stories tend not to be associated with being an adult genre).
All in all it reminds me of "The Animals of Farthing Wood" and like that it made me cry but left me wanting to hear more.
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very good
keeeeeep writing -
Hey Geri,
This was great! I loved the pairing of an eagle and a rat, as unlikely as it might seem. Wouldn't mind seeing this expanded on. It would make a really good kids story. Thought it deserved more than HM myself.
Saw a couple of little things you might want to look at.
Para8-line3 mask
Para22-line3 fill
Para34-line2 corncob
That's it.
Steve

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wow. I was actually hoping the humans would find Mr. Edgar.... *sniff* I'm a sucker for animals.
Great story. -
Very good story telling.
I enjoyed reading it. I spent the whole story trying to figuue out what kind of animal you were describing. Then I got down to the contest name and realized it must be an eagle. Great story and you did a wonderful job of holding my interest through the whole story.
Trish

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This was cute. I liked Edgar and Riona even better. Your voice was well done as was the word choice. I wish you would have continued it, but I still like the story how it is! Good job.


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I only wrote it for the contest
and it didn't work out as good as I thought.
I like the idea and plot so I'll change the characters and use it as a scene in a novel.
Thanks so much for reading.
Geri
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This was interesting, and I enjoyed reading it. I didn't read it closely enough in the beginning to pick up on the fact that the narrator was an eagle, but as the story went on I realized it nonetheless.
I felt as though it stopped too early--I wanted to read more! :]
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I love to write about talking animals, of course I can usually do very well 'talking' with my own furry and feather friends.
Thanks so much for reading and commeting
I was a bit disapointed in that this wasn't as good as I thought.
Geri
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This was an interesting story. I like the different perspective. However, it confused me. Im not sure why, but i did, and i just wasn't sure exactly what was going on...
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Hi thanks for reading. I do wish you would be more specific—I can’t fix what I’m unaware of
.
The story is simply about two creatures considered natural enemies an eagle and a rat. It was written to fit into Condor’s contest.
Edgar the Eagle is the narrator. He tells how the two are cast out in world by a house fire. Edgar, a fledging is injured and can’t fly. A female rat’s litter is dead. Instead of trying to make a meal out of one another they band together to survive.
Geri
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i looked it over once more and have concluded
That it was a combination of my own lack of attention and the way you introduced the characters. Im not sure why, i just seemed to have missed it. But thats my bad. It really is a good story, it just seemed a little fuzzy in the beginning for no particular reason to me. Now that im no longer confused after a second go, I did enjoy the theme. It is an interesting perspective.
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Edgar the eagle =)
This is such a cute story... wah, and you said nest up there, how are Edgar's babies? (The only birds I know that have nests are those with families
so wah)
I am an animal lover
and an even large bird lover 


As a kid, I always believed animals could talk amongst themselves. Reading this made me remember that belief, and remind me that I continue to believe in this
I love how their friendship started...
and the image of Edgar covering himself with his wings AND expecting her to attack him, haha
very cute
and even if this is still unfinished, I have a BAD feeling how this will turn out (cute stories, especially with animals in them, always have one of the characters dying
)...
Nonetheless, I enjoyed reading this
do continue! ^_^


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Hi Soda, thanks for reading and enjoying my story

Eagar is real.
Can he talk?—I believe he can.
Several years ago he made a nest in a tree that over looks our back roof.
He’s a crow and disappears for weeks. But he always comes back and when he’s in residency, he will come down to the lower branches, where he can look in the window and torment one of our Parrots.
Maxi ( a cheery-headed conure) use to squeal in anger but now she just chatters away with him. I do believe Eagar tells her tales about his adventures.
While our two cats lay in sun listening.
Geri
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Aww!
Geri, you made my day
(Really early sunday morning ^_^ and I am NOT a morning person.. not until it's 10 AM anyway
)
I have pet chickens.. and I am convinced they believe they can talk with us
they join in my family's conversations, and even react when we shout/call out to any of our siblings
and they react to my laughter (they "laugh" too
) and sneeze (they do this odd dinosaur sound
)
Anyway, aww... Edgar probably talks to your parrots so they will KNOW how it's like to fly fly fly
Thank you for this nonfiction fiction
and added tales 



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Hi,I absolutely loved this story and it really touched me so much. You kind of left me hanging in the end and I hope sometime you might decide to continue this as it is absolutely brilliant. Thank you so much for entering.


beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
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Thanks for the thumbup and applause. I sometimes write up scenes and later pump them into novels I'm working on.
This idea will certainly find a home somewhere.
The idea of creators who are natural enemies cohabitating always fascinates me--I have seen it happen so often.
We have three Parrots, my son brought home the class pet for the summer—Ike was a large white rat.
My sister-in-law nearly had a heart attack
. In her defense, we also allow three dogs and two cats permanent residency.
Ike was to stay in his cage---oh yes, that lasted about one day. I got up early on the third morning and discovered Ike—feasting away on seed in the bottom of Tinker Bell’s (African Grey) cage.
Ike survived the summer, developed a taste for Bird Seed, Dog food and Cat kibble.
Geri
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