The Son of Man... chapter 1

1

Prologue2

“What are you doing beggar? Come out and show yourself!”3

Stephen timidly peeked over the wall. “I… I was only…resting.”4

“Rest somewhere else, thief!” Ethan Ben Judah bellowed, shaking his stick. “You nearly frightened my daughter to her grave!”5

“I am no thief!” Stephen yelled. “I am a hard working stonemason from Shechem…I am from the line of Libertines! I studied under Rabbi Gamaliel—”6

“And look at you now noble Libertine,” Ethan Ben Judah said. “What have you done, that you must hide behind the house of an honorable man?”7

“I told you, I’m not hiding. I only recently arrived in Jerusalem for Passover…I…had a very tiring journey…I am only resting—”8

“Rest behind another man’s house,” Ethan Ben Judah yelled back. “Frighten another man’s children!”9

“It’s just as well,” Stephen answered stepping out from behind the wall, “I find you… most unaccommodating and…nothing would please me more than to put a good bit of distance between you and me.” He quickly turned and began making his way into the street, then suddenly turned back. “Tell me, before I leave…what have you heard of the…have you heard of any…disturbances?” 10

“What are you babbling about Libertine?” Ethan Ben Judah growled, still brandishing his stick.11

“There was a man, earlier…I think he was to have been crucified—”12

“So, that’s it!” Ethan Ben Judah yelled. “You’re one of them. You’re a disciple of Jesus of Nazareth. No wonder you’re hiding like a little mouse!”13

“Of course I’m not a disciple of…of the Nazarene,” Stephen stammered. “I was in the crowd who… I just saw him carrying his cross through the streets earlier. I was only wondering—”14

“You’re not fooling anyone.” Ethan Ben Judah snarled, “They crucified the Nazarene and they’ll soon crucify you. Now, leave this place before I summon Herod’s guard!”15

Stephen turned and ran into the dimly lit street. He ran as quickly as he could, getting as far away from the menacing man as possible. He turned into an alley and sprinted through it, took another right and blasted into a crowded walkway knocking one man down and nearly toppling another. He rolled away and tumbled into a loud group of drunken Roman soldiers.16

“Watch where you’re going pig!” one of the soldiers yelled, pulling Stephen up from the ground by his hair.17

“You like spilling expensive wine do you?” Another soldier said, emptying his flask of wine over Stephen’s head. Stephen folded, fell to the ground and felt a sharp kick to his ribs.18

“Tent group!” a voice yelled from somewhere above him, “We have business!”19

The Roman soldiers immediately moved away from Stephen.20

“He ran right into us.” one of the soldiers said.21

“That’s the truth.” said another. “He came out of the alley and—” 22

“I don’t care about that Hebrew!” The Roman Optio interrupted, glaring at Stephen. “The Governor wants us at Golgotha, now! Get rid of your wine before the Centurion sees it.”23

“But we’ve only just now purchased it,” one of the soldiers said.24

“All the better,” the Optio yelled. “You’ll be less drunk. Now get rid of it!”25

The soldier shook his head, moved back, tipped his flask over and began spilling the rest of his wine over Stephen, still lying in the dirt. The soldiers standing nearby rocked with laughter.26

“At least it’s going for a good cause.” Another soldier yelled, moving in to pour his own wine over Stephen.27

“He is a follower of Jesus of Nazareth!” A raspy voice yelled. 28

The soldiers turned and looked behind them.29

“He has been hiding behind my house hoping to escape justice!” Ethan Ben Judah hollered. He’d obviously heard the commotion and came to investigate.30

“What are you talking about old gray haired rat?” The Optio hollered, moving towards Ethan Ben Judah.31

“H-He was hiding behind my house,” Ethan Ben Judah answered backing away. “He said he was a follower of Jesus of Nazareth.”32

The Optio turned away from Ethan Ben Judah and moved back to Stephen, still lying in the wine soaked dirt. He reached and pulled Stephen to his feet. “What do you have to say of this? Are you a follower of Jesus of Nazareth?”33

“No,” Stephen answered, “I-I don’t even know who that is—”34

“He lies,” another man said, standing nearby. “I’ve seen him with Jesus’ followers.”35

The Optio pulled Stephen’s face toward his. “I ask you again Hebrew, are you a follower of Jesus of Nazareth?”36

Stephen’s eyes filled with tears as he stared into the weathered eyes of the Roman Optio. “Yes,” he answered softly.37

“No more,” the Optio said evenly, “your leader is being crucified even as we speak.” The Optio shoved him away, turned and faced the soldiers. “Move!” he bellowed.38

To Stephen’s amazement the soldiers turned and disappeared into the crowded street. He whirled and ran in the opposite direction. He spun into another alley, leapt back into the shadows and fell to the ground sobbing. 39

He had publicly announced he was a follower. The Sanhedrin knew. The Romans knew. His family knew. Everyone knew he followed the Nazarene. They crucified Jesus and now he was sure they’d come for him. 40

A fresh wave of terror drove him to his feet. He numbly resumed his journey.41

Why hadn’t the Romans taken him when they had the chance? Why did they let him go? He reached into his wine soaked clothing, pulled out a small flask, gulped down the rest of his warm water then pushed the flask back under his sash. Confused and unsure, he decided to try to make it to Golgotha. He needed to know what was happening…if Jesus was really being crucified he had to see it for himself. 42

He carefully made his way through the city. As he slowly approached Golgotha he could see three crosses silhouetted against a darkening sky. Jesus was nailed to the center cross. He appeared to be dead. A small spark of hope surfaced as he noticed people milling around beneath the crosses. They were people he knew were followers. Everyone knew they were followers of Jesus, mostly women, but there were a few men. John was there. John was one of Jesus’ most trusted disciples. 43

Stephen felt a pang of self-loathing. If only he were that brave, just once in his miserable life. 44

Most of those beneath the cross were openly crying and wailing for Jesus… right in the presence of the Roman soldiers. Could it be that this was the end of it? Maybe they wouldn’t hunt him down after all. 45

He moved in closer, trying to blend in. Making it all of the way to the base of the center cross, he looked up into the eyes of the man hanging there. He stepped back in horror as the tormented eyes slowly opened. He gasped as Jesus’ eyes focused on him and then...Stephen’s heart seemed to stop.46

Jesus softly smiled down on him. The great eyes were filled with tears and pain, but still…ever so softly smiling. Stephen’s eyes welled with tears as an inaudible moan rose up from his soul. He stumbled backwards and fell to the ground. It took him a moment to return to himself, but when he did, he knew he belonged body and soul to the man on the cross.47

No longer afraid, he sat at the foot of the cross as Jesus asked God to forgive His tormenters. He witnessed Jesus asking His Father why He had forsaken Him. He saw the Roman push a sword deep into Jesus’ side. He watched Him die and somewhere during the course of those heart crushing hours, Stephen reached into his clothes and retrieved the water flask he’d emptied earlier. From a crimson puddle within a stone crevice he carefully, lovingly, filled the flask with the blood of his beloved Christ. This he would keep with him for the rest of his short life.48

Chapter One49

The Gathering50

Dr. James Markus Donahue sat on the edge of a hard wooden stool working through the complicated process of identifying a sample recently shipped to his lab at MIT. In a few hours, he would notice how uncomfortable he was. For now, all his attention was focused on an area of DNA called the D1S80 Locus, an area of chromosome holding the varying sequence lengths used to identify unique genetic fingerprints. The phone rang. 51

“Yes?” 52

“Did you get it?” the voice on the other end asked. 53

“Of course I did.”54

“And?”55

“Wouldn’t know—someone’s annoying phone calls keep interrupting my work.”56

“Sorry, Jim, but this is very important.” 57

“It had better be. Otherwise, I would’ve had a student run the test, like I usually do.”58

“A team of students have already run the test—twice.” 59

“So…why am I doing it?”60

“Because you never would have believed it otherwise.” 61

“Believed what? What are you into, Blaze?” 62

“I won’t bother you again,” the voice said, ignoring the question. “But please, call me as soon as you get the results. I can’t tell you how important it is. Oh, and remember— keep it under wraps.” 63

“Yeah, Blaze—under wraps. Gotcha.”64

Donahue put the phone down and returned to his work. He finished isolating, then digesting the plasmid DNA with the use of restrictive enzymes, then used electrophoresis to observe banding patterns on an agarose gel. Once he finished, he compared that sample with the sample Blaze had sent him the week before, reached for the phone and was surprised at how fast his friend picked up.65

“This is Father Jenkins.”66

“Yeah, Blaze, you’re right. The two samples match.”67

“You’re certain?”68

“No question about it. You gonna let me in on this?”69

“Absolutely, everything depends on it. Can you get away soon?”70

“I suppose I could—if it’s really important.”71

“Could you come here to Nashville as soon as possible? I have some people I want you to meet.”72

“Okay,” Donahue answered. “I’ll try to make arrangements and, uh— let you know.”73

“Thanks, Jim. You won’t regret it.”74

Father Jenkins hung up, leaving Donahue staring at his phone.75

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Comments

1 - 16 of 16
  • Allegeri
    February 25

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    Great, wonderfully involving

    I really did enjoy the prologue because I got absorbed in it. The action and dialogue is natural and flowing and the sequence of events is logical, but I have to wonder why write a novel to include a story so over-used as that of Christ? Concentrate your talents elsewhere to new material instead of rehashing a tired tale, because even the best author would have trouble bringing life and excitement to something that we have heard so much.


  • angellove silver member
    February 7

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    What did Stephen look like that would scare children? What was he wearing? Was he bruised and sickly? Was he dirty?What did Ethan look like? What was he wearing? I think I know the Stephen you are writing about in the prologue. It is very interesting that you chose a part of his story to introduce your story. That is very creative.

    I liked your dialogue in Chapter 1, but what were the tones of voice used in the conversations? Did it change? Did it stay the same?

    It would help me to see some of the action involved with the complicated scientific terms used. I don't have much knowledge about what certain scientific process used in labs are called. Definitely use them, but it would help to show a bit of what the scientist is doing. You lost me on the scientific terms that are foreign to me, but I do understand it had to do with DNA.

    I'll be reading more of this story soon, so read you later.

    Write On!

    Beth

    beginning: 5, language: 4, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 4, characters: 4.


  • Rosemary silver member
    February 5

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    Good story

    I thought it was well written and your use of terminology in the past and present day was excellent. I thought the story was very vivid and had good details. I hope you will continue on.


  • TheDeadMan
    February 4
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    awsome write. great imagery of the time.

    beginning: 5, language: 4, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 4.


  • BloodRedPrimrose
    February 2
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    That was amazing really well writen, I loved cant wait to read more (:


  • RxxSpiritWolfxxJ
    January 31

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    Oh, very nice indeed. A good old treasure hunt, with ancient clues, archaeology, and Biblical references. I can see it now ...
    keep it up, mate, and I'll give the whole series a read.


  • Hatshepsut gold member
    January 22

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    AWESOME!!! This is totally my kind of novel. I love it! A bit of history, and some good old fashioned modern forensic anthroplogy. Nice!

    I think I know where you might be going with this, given the title and the content so far...and it is very intriguing!

    I am dying to know where you learned about DNA sequencing. Just a lot of research, or a skill?

    I saw absolutely nothing to critique. I really, really love this--keep it coming!!

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 4, dialog: 5, characters: 5.


  • Andy Stephenson gold member
    January 22

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    Hi!

    This is very good. It is an interesting start that takes us in a quite different direction. I'd like to see how it develops if I have the time to follow it.

    Are you familiar with Taylor Caldwell? She wrote historical fiction about Luke(Dear and Glorious Physician), Paul(Great Lion of God), and Judas(I, Judas). She researched her books at the Vatican library. They are quite good. This reminded me of her books.

    Andy


  • Lady Eventide Greeters member
    January 22

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    I really think that this is rather good. I would suggest a few commas here and there, and perhaps some hyphens, but my main suggestion would be more description in parts where there is mainly dialogue. Not much, mind, but enough for me to imagine each and every scene you wrote in perfect clarity...as if I'm there, you know. I really like where this is going. So, DO keep me posted.


  • Dmchale
    January 19

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    I really like this, I think the idea behind this story is really good and I can't wait to see where you are headed with this.

  • Kasdas2
    January 18
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    Great prologue. Can't critique this work much as my skills are not on the same level as yours.

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.


  • gerifitzsimmons Greeters member
    January 16

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    The prologue was great .

    It captured the horrible scenes of the Crucifixion of Christ in a rather unorthodox manner through the eyes of a frightened young man. You used the plot to draw your reader in and I look forward to enjoying more of your novel.

    I’m afraid that will have to wait. I had too many commitments this week and the first chapter of this was tooo long. That’s a poor excuse but it’s the only one I have. So the rateing is just for the prologue.

    This group is new for me also and I was seriously attempting to break-in . Apparently it is not happening .

    Good luck, Geri

    beginning: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, characters: 5.

1 - 16 of 16