There once was a Caterpillar 1
that turned into this beautiful butterfly2
she was so happy with the way she had 3
changed and used her beautiful wings to 4
get around and visit far away places she 5
had never gone before.. 6
In her ventures she met this handsome spider..7
He wooed her with his rugged charms and talked 8
of his fabulous home..9
The spider invited the butterfly to his home 10
one day..says “come see the beautiful place 11
I have built”.. 12
The butterfly was amazed with13
the beauty if the spiders’ home .. He says 14
“come here lil butterfly let me wrap you in 15
my blanket and keep you safe and warm”.. as 16
he spun his “blanket of warmth” slowly around 17
her he slowly kissed her neck and slowly started 18
sucking the life from her little by little more 19
each day and she was unaware..20
After a while of this she started 21
transforming into a spider and 22
felt her beautiful butterfly wings being cast 23
from her body..as she slowly crawled from his 24
"blanket of warmth" she realized what had 25
happened to her.26
She felt safe in ways she wasn’t sure of but 27
still uncomfortable in many ways..she had many 28
things to consider if she wanted to keep some 29
of her butterfly ways but felt she had slipped 30
deeper into his lair..and needed to find a way 31
to go on and be happy..32
She new of the spiders deceptions and wicked 33
ways but loved him for all he was..she had 34
to adapt herself to survive and make the best 35
of what she had in her life..as she transformed 36
into a spider.. she slowly wrapped him into her37
”blanket of warmth”....38
and gently kissed his neck..39
Author notes
just something that popped into my head...so i wrote it down.. didnt' turn out like I had hoped.. so I will be makin some changes
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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I liked this. It is very creative. Keep up the good work.
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I like this piece a lot because of how the butterfly is so naively taken in by the spider, but at the end she gets back at him so neatly and deftly that he doesn't even notice. Very well done!
~Amanda -
hehe this is quite a tale... Is it supposed to represent human relationships in some way? Very tricky...
Well written though, with some nice phrase jumps.
Ostara -
I really enjoyed this. Very creative and a good use of metaphores. A fear in the middle when you think the butterfly is doomed and a nice twist at the end.
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I really liked this. Very sad, and poignant if you look at is a metaphor. But I like the twist at the end, the hope. This was a very interesting and intelligent way of writing. It made me think of an abused woman who finally rises above it. Maybe that's not what its about, but i still loved it.
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good
This was another very clever story. Does the trapping of the butterfly, mean the way the world around us can change us, or deceives us? then” blanket of warmth”.... and gently kissed his neck... this was a sweet kiss of revenge I liked.
Image and Visions … dare to dream
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