Confessions From A Moleskine - Paranoia thoughts

Is this reality or is it a dream.1

I seem to be alone yet I am surrounded by so many people.2

He comes home, he looks at me and he smiles. There is something hidden underneath the smile that he puts on. I can feel it, sense, it, breath it and I know that I am alone even when he is around.3

Then there are the pages of our life that I want to write. The time is so little, though we have shared so much in our time together.4

I scream inside my mind, I scream when no one is listening or watching and I don’t even need the attention. I want his attention, I want him to pay attention and he does not even see that I am falling apart slowly.5

I don’t know how I can feel his emotions, It is not like I sit down beside him or look at him and know what he is thinking, but I can tell what he is feeling. It is one of my hated traits.6

One day I want to be able to understand why it is I that I assume so much before I know the truth, but would I really be ready for the truth?7

Or are something’s in life better left unsaid to bare us the truth of pain ?8

Author notes


♥ ♥ ♥

My name is actually Tennille Marianna Chase
A.K.A Blair Mirth

My favorite color would be turquoise, did I spell that right, Black and turquoise go so well together I think.

My favorite food is pasta with veggies, cheese and mayo !!! mm mmm mm a dish I like to call "whatever us left in the fridge"

Blair xoxox
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I'LL BE JUST FINE PRETENDING I'M NOT. I'M FAR FROM LONELY AND IT'S ALL THAT I'VE GOT. ~ The Used - All that I've got.
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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • KodyBoye
    January 7

    Edit | Reply
    I think you should just walk around town naked. You'll get attention that way, LOL! <3

    But yeah, you did a good job on this. It's easy to relate to what you're going through because you don't beat around the bush, haha.

    You did a nice job describing what you were going through at the time of writing the peace. It's simple, it's to the point, and it's easy to read and understand.

    Good work, Miss. Blair.


  • Dawn Bon
    January 7

    Edit | Reply

    Rule Folower

    Thanks for folowing the rules first of all, because some people didnt im after them.. and this is exactly what i was looking for and thanks for entering!

  • NightVixen
    January 7

    Edit | Reply
    For the first time all day I'm at a loss for words. I see so much pain in the words on this page and can empathize so much. Bleh, I just want to hug you again.


  • Reaver Greeters member
    January 6

    Edit | Reply
    This was actually very thoughtful. Painful. You sounded so sad in the words and i wanted to give you a hug.

    Maybe you should sit down and talk with hima bout what you are feeling. Let him know when you are feeling like things are a bit out of place. That's what couples do.

    I hope this gets better for you blairy...you deserve all the smiles in the world.

    RIan

    luck in the contest to


    • Prodigious.Mirth
      January 6
      Edit | Reply
      I plan on doing so.
      well when I can actually get a moment to sit down and talk with him. Right now it is difficult.
      I love him a lot. So very much.

      It will get better.
      I guess all couples go through their periods of ups and downs and its how you make it work that determines the relationship.

      thanks for reading
      I really appreciate the comment.

      Blair <3


  • Amicus2K9
    January 6

    Edit | Reply

    Welcome to humanity...

    ...thas why man invented God, so He, would be there at all times, to turn to and receive comfort from, forever and ever...but then, we are human, with human needs and we turn to each other for a degree of that warmth to convince ourselves that we are indeed alive...

    Ready for this? You are conceived as a separate entity, are born alone, live alone and die alone. That is all there is and that is all ye need know.

    (With apologies to Keats, I think)

    amicus...

    • Prodigious.Mirth
      January 6
      Edit | Reply
      I guess it is the way that you look at life.
      Not everyone believes in the same things and region is a topic I don't really like getting into, but in the same respect I do believe that we are born alone and we die alone and when all is said and done we do live alone, people come and go into our lives to teach us something

      Thanks you for the comment
      good luck with your writing in 09
      Blair


  • asthray.heart
    January 6

    Edit | Reply
    It will get better hopefully, when he is home long enough to sit down and talk everything through with you.
    Be brave and strong.

    • Prodigious.Mirth
      January 6
      Edit | Reply
      I dare say it will.
      I remember this line from Benjamin button it went something along the lines of sometimes we have to loose the ones we love to know how important they are to us. Not that I wish this upon myself but I keep it in kind even though it hurts it is the truth.

      I am sure we will get the time to talk.
      It is more so about my own courage to talk and not let it settle.

      thanks for commenting
      I really appreciate it
      good luck with your writing in o9

      blair

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