To quote John Mayor-No Such Thing "There's no such thing as the real world, it's just a lie we have to rise above."1
High school is suppose to be a war zone of clicks, crews, and movie style drama. Now, I'm not saying that every school doesn't have it's share of these,but have you ever really stopped to look at the smaller little known groups inside this larger one? Of course you have the normal groups. 2
Jocks,Preps,Goth,Bookworms,Druggies,Potheads,Slackers,Dramas ect.3
What about Wood-shop? Printing? Home-Economics? Theater? Business? English? The little gems that make a school, as much as we all hate to admit it, a bearable place to be during the day.4
I have you thinking now don't I. Of that one class you've had or maybe your in now that you truly enjoy. That gets you through the day and maybe even puts a smile on your face.5
Well, I'm going to share with you the one that made school worth it. That forced me to put up with the most hellish subject in the known universe and finally walk across the rickety stage to graduation.
Author notes
Feel Free to tell me what you think and give suggestions as the time goes on.
Comments
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" A Range Of Options "
That's a good entry
Once I would've said 'nice' but of course, now I know that 'nice' is the nastiest word in English language!
Your entry sort of confused me though. What is it about? Maybe if you could post the first chapter instead then so I could get a better idea if you have one? Because also, your word count is less than 300 - I'm not too bothered about the word count, but if you could tell me what option you chose too.
Thanks
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Hmmmm, cant really remember a particular class
What I do remember is always going to that class where the teacher was awesome and everybody was fun to be around. The room was light-hearted and relaxed. I think it was my gym class in high school. It was the last class of my day and that was what I looked forward to everyday. -
Moo. I'm ready to see what nutty experiments you cooked up i your younger years, Babe. Just tell me you never burned down the school kitchen.
*hugs* -
keeps me intersted, thats for sire. It seems like you have a winning idea here, definatly. I understand the whole "one class that gets you through the day" idea, as I have a few.
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Good Job :)
Me like it so far its really nice and simple but its good
Cant wait to read more x
xox HEX xox -
hello =)
First of all, welcome to SAR ^_^
Not sure if it's because I studied in another country, or that I also went to an all-girls' Catholic school, but.. some of those "normal" (Are they really "normal"? Haha
) groups did not exist, or some are inter-woven together 
Nonetheless, I have seen that in movies and I'm quite fascinated by the highschool culture over there.
A few corrections though:
Title: Experiance -> Experience
Prologe -> Prologue
and paragraph 2, "suppose" is supposed to be "supposed" (well, I think x.x)
Anyway, that's about it thanks for sharing this with us
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Mmm... druggies...
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Of course fiction writers are especially guilty of overlooking the average and going for the bizarre—
Thank you for sharing this narrative with us. I suppose too often, with all the other activity out there, we tend to forget or discount the perfectly normal situations in every day life.
We even distort those high school years, which were once the period of learning about life, and learning a trade that could put cash in our pocket. It’s like those years that prepared young people have just become a continuation of childhood and we wait for college to grow up at bit.
Of course fiction writers are especially guilty of overlooking the average and going for the bizarre—that’s what sells.
Nice clear writing, that was easy to follow.
May I ask, what do you intend to use it for?
Geri
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It's a good start, and I like that you don't say which class you're talking about. It seemed a bit short otherwise, though. Maybe a bit more detail, without giving anything extra away?
Also, your list of cliques needs spaces after each comma, and "ect" is "etc", which I don't think has been mentioned yet.
For your title, it's "Experience" and "(Prologue)" as well.
Is Culinary a class? Like, Home Ec? I loved baking in Home Ec. Wonder if they call it that anymore...
*iz old*
Can't wait to see more! How rare is it that anyone mentions something GOOD about high school these days?
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Although I graduated a loooooong time ago, I enjoyed this piece. I also like how you left the reader hanging, but I would definitely like to see what follows the prologue....
A couple editing points:
P 2...High school is suppose to be a war zone of clicks, crews, and movie style drama. Now, I'm not saying that every school doesn't have it's share of these,but have you ever really stopped to look at the smaller little known groups inside this larger one? Of course you have the normal groups. 2
-- I don't think there is supposed to be an (') in its. Also, perhaps you could add a colon after groups, since you follow it up with a list of the cliques:
Jocks,Preps,Goth,Bookworms,Druggies,Potheads,Slackers,Dramas ect.3
Other than that, this was well done....I would definitely read the follow-up to this prologue.
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You've ended this prologue with a good hook, leaving readers wanting to know what the subject in question was.
Some edits for your consideration:
Title - Experiance s/b Experience
Para 2 - clicks s/b cliques
Para 5 - I have you thinking now don't I. - s/b a question mark
Para 5 - maybe your s/b maybe you're
Is this a prologue to a novel or a 'one-off story?
beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.
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Being in highschool, i find this interesting. (id be with the slackers dont judge me lol) The way you set this up definatly draws in the reader to want more. Good job, i hope to see the next part posted in SAR
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Hehe. "Cliques." Love you still!
My suggestion us purple. Cause purple is good. Fun story! I want more! Cause I know a lot of the weird things that happened in Culinary. This will be fun.
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