Confessions From A Moleskin - More notebook confessions from Novemeber

I must admit my goal seems foolish at this point in time.1

It is nearing the end of November. My Nano intentions drifted away only but a few days after the launch night party.2

One hours spent writing and I do not think I have ever hated my writing as much as I did and still do after completing five pages of utter drivel. 3

What appreciation and support.4

It goes to show and let me make this part of my history, that you are only famous or rather new for one day, twenty-four hours and after that it is only a matter of time before the new becomes old. 5

I cannot tell you when the daunting feeling set in or why I write now wishing I could gain that muse that had ignited me for months on end while I wrote, never once tiring from a sore wrist and being able to stand sleepless days and nights in low with page after paper with the stories I was writing. 6

Which is why my goal seems stupid, to complete the rest of my notebook in a matter of weeks: foolish.7

Maybe I should opt for my morning pages. I do miss the feeling of pen to paper and the smell of ink leaving me on a small high all during the day a I either delve into my world or delve into one I clearly created on my own.8

Oh how I love the ink bleeding on  and through the pages and thus this is what I call writers stump. Never being even thought of as the pages pile up, stacked on my desk.9

Maybe it is the feeling of simplicity in the keyboard that damaged my love for the notebook, for the pages and the pen. Or maybe it was those relationships where instead of thinking of myself, instead of doing what was right for me. I opted to please everyone else only so they could say I inspire them and to them they were my fans.10

I do miss that.