As Easy As It Sounds

I stared at the white bathroom wall in shock. Unblinking, tears filled my eyes and cascaded down my cheeks. I barely registered this. My worst suspicions and thoughts were right. 1

"Shit." I whispered softly, cursing without the energy for true force. 2

I felt completely numb, unable to process the information literally staring me in the face. Sixteen, and pregnant. 3

I woke up as I admitted this, and gasped, drawing in shallow breaths as I began to hyperventilate in panic. I forced myself to breathe deeper, bracing herself against the sink. 4

I splashed water in my face, hoping, in part, that I would wake up and it would just be an awful nightmare. I wiped away the mascara from my eyes and looked at myself in the mirror. Long, dark hair, green eyes and all 5”5 of my body stared back at me.5

"What have I done?" I asked myself. I ran my hand through my hair and exhaled deeply as the phone rang. 6

"Hello?" I answered unenthusiastically.7

"Hey, babe." I heard the one voice I wanted to hear, and the one voice I didn't want to hear. "How you been, darlin'?"8

“To be honest, babe, I've been better. Can you come round? Got something I need to tell you.”9

Jake said he would over in a few minutes and I hung up the phone. 10

“Honey, I'm ho-o-o-me.” Jake sang as he came through the front door. I was curled up in the living room floor, leaning against the sofa. “What's wrong?” He asked, worried, as he saw my tear-stained face. I looked up at him, holding out one hand to him, trying to smile to reassure him. He took my hand and sat and the floor next to me, pulling me into his arms. 11

“Come on, babe, it can't be that bad...what's wrong? Who do I need to beat up for upsetting you?” Jake half-joked. I half-smiled at him.12

“There's no one for you to beat up this time, babe. And it is that bad.” I looked up at his concerned face.13

“I don't know how this happened, but...I'm p-pr-god i can't even say it.” I sighed. “I'm pregnant.”14

The silence that filled the room after I said that was deafening. Jake's face was frozen, he looked how I had felt earlier. 15

“How-? Wha- ? Buh-?” Jake stuttered. I nodded,16

“I know. Baby, look at me, please.” I pleaded gently, pulling Jake's face towards mine. “I don't know what we're going to do. I need you, babe.” My voice broke on the last sentence and Jake snapped back into reality.17

“You've got me, Lily, don't worry. I'm not going anywhere.” 18

I was so relieved and overcome by emotion that I collapsed against him. He wrapped his arms around me tighter and pressed his lips to my forehead. “I'm not going anywhere.” 19

I visited the GP, so I knew the home pregnancy kit was right. There was no denying it. I was a six weeks pregnant. I still hadn't decided what to do, whether to tell my parents that I was carrying around something half-way between a sea-monkey and a tadpole, or to have an abortion and not tell them anything. 20

Jake tried to be as supportive as possible, we were nearly inseparable now. But there is only so much he could do. I needed a girl's mind.21

“You're pregnant?!” Taylor gasped, astonished. I hurriedly shushed her, grabbing her hand.22

“Yes, please keep your voice down! I haven't told my parents!” 23

“Sorry,” she grimaced. “What are you going to do? Does Jake know?”24

“Yes, Jake knows. I told him the day I took the test. And I have no idea what I'm going to do.”25

“Are you 100% certain?” Taylor asked as if the thought had just occurred to her, which, knowing Taylor, it probably had.26

“I've been to the doctor's,” I explained. “What am I going to do, Tay? I can't have a baby! I'm 16 for god's sake!”27

“So have an abortion,” Taylor shrugged like it was no big deal what she was suggesting. “Just don't tell you're parents.”28

It wasn't like I hadn't considered this option myself, I reasoned. Maybe it was as easy as it sounded.