Twilight Parody chapter 2

The next day Edward comes to school. Yippee!1

Edward and Bella are sitting together in biology...2

Edward: Hello Bella. My na-3

Bella: How did you know my name was Bella?
When someone gets my name wrong I get pissed off and correct them, but when someone gets it right, I suspiciously ask them why, (which is a stupid question in the first place). There's no way to please me.4

Edward: Oh. right. I knew that since I heard everyone else thinking your name... My bad. 5

Bella: What?6

Edward: Oh nothing... 7

Sit in awkward silence for a while. For some reason Edward isn't wondering what's wrong with her.8

Edward: So anyhoo... it's nice to meet you. (Maybe if I pretend I didn't glare at her in the first place she won't remember). My name is-9

Bella: Oh I know who you are, you're Edward Cullen. I look for you during lunch everyday, and when you're here, I stare at you because you're hot.10

Edward: Huh? Well then maybe you won't mind that I watch that I watch you sleep every night.11

Bella: What?12

Edward: Oh nothing...13

Rest of class is spent in awkward silence.
So for the next few days Edward and Bella cheerfully flirt and chat. Edward even invites Bella to eat lunch with him. Bella talks about herself A LOT and for some reason Edward seems interested. The conversations are as follows:14

Edward: Tell me more about yourself.15

Bella: I hate everything cold and/or wet, I hate Forks, and I just moved from Phoenix since my mom got engaged.16

Edward: Wow, that is SO interesting, tell me more. For some reason I find each insignificant detail of your life utterly fascinating. What's your favorite color?17

Bella: It changes everyday.18

Edward: Amazing, there must some deep, hidden meaning in that... Why else would I care so much?19

Yes, why DOES he care so much?20

Supposedly Edward isn't being sarcastic, but I have my own theories...
So anyway, one day Bella almost gets hit by a car but Edward saves her. Then he ignores her. Then one day he starts to talk to her again. Of course Bella forgives him because he's hot, (which is mentioned multiple times). I'm going to skip over these parts because I found them pointless and boring. Yes, we get that Edward is hot, and yes we get that he doesn't want to hurt Bella, but he decides to take her alone to a deserted clearing, (where no one can hear her scream), anyway. How caring. 21

In a beautiful little clearing filled with flowers and all the other nauseating, cheesy, but romantic stuff one can imagine...22

Bella, (running into field): Oh it's so beautiful! Isn't it Edward? Edward?23

Edward (standing in shade): I don't want you to see me like this Bella.24

Bella: What are you talking about?25

Edward: I don't want you to see me as I truly am. 26

Bella: I don't care. I don't care if you're a monster. I don't care if you're a murderer. I don't care if you're stalking me, (actually I find it quite flattering), and I don't care if I'm risking my life at this very moment. I love you, even if you've barely told me a thing about yourself.27

Edward: Well... I actually meant that I tried to go to a tanning salon, and i think it backfired. You know... me being a vampire and all.28

Edward steps into the field, and sparkles brilliantly where touched by the sun, (or glitters slightly, as in the movie). Sparkles... many