My Story, My Life

Elizabeth Rose Carver. That’s me. Black hair, violet eyes, five-foot-nine, one-twenty pounds, Latin-American, eighteen, and single. I’m the leader of a gang that goes by the name of El Loco Diablo Bromea, The Crazy Devil Kids. There are around twenty us and we pretty much worship the devil. Everyone made me leader because I can fight the best. 1

When I was thirteen, first joining this gang, my parents were kidnapped. I tracked down the creeps who took them and beat the hell out of them. The police were talking about it and the gang heard. They made me leader at once. The police helped me search the premises but my parents were never found. The police quit the search after a year, but I still pass around flyers with the most recent pictures of my parents. 2

December eighteenth, 2003, we took a holiday photo together. Mom and I were wearing matching white dresses with red sashes that reached our knees and the sleeves stopped just below our shoulders. Dad was wearing an emerald green tux and ink-black shoes. Our black hair was tucked back, all three of us wore it long and had it tied loosely yet beautifully. We were wearing Santa hats and sitting on a sofa. Dad had his arms around me and mom, mom had her arms around dad’s neck, and I had my arms around his waist. 3

I look down at the stack of flyers in my hands. A tear falls onto them. 4

“Maldición estas lágrimas.” I mutter. Angelica Creave laughs beside me. She’s one of my best friends in the gang. I glare at her.5

“Sorry, Lizzy. Es funny when tú cuss.” Angelica apologizes. I stare into her black eyes, trying to find any deceitful flickerings. I sigh and take in her appearance the way I do when spending so many hours on the streets with her, walking or passing out flyers. Her dark brown hair is cropped short and reaches her shoulders, she’s smaller than me-height and figure-by quite a few inches, and she weighs about ten pounds less than me. She’s also from Spain and doesn’t know efficient English. 6

“That’s alright, Angelica. I know how it amuses you. We’re good.” I tell her. She smiles at me and sighs.7

“Tenemos que cumplir con la banda en el bosque en nueve. Tenemos diez minutos. Vamos a caminar.” Angelica says. She only speaks in Spanish because a couple’s walking by. I nod and we start walking, still passing out flyers.8

“Please, help me find my parents. They’ve been kidnapped.” I say to those I hand flyers to. 9

“Por favor, ayudar a mi amigo encontrar a sus padres. Han sido secuestrados.” Angelica says. Those who don’t speak Spanish glance at the flyers and see the English. They understand at once and look at me to see that it’s been quite a few years since then. They smile and walk away. I pull my winter jacket closer to my body, trying to keep the night air out. My breath comes out in puffs of white. It’s December ninth, almost the five year mark since my parents were taken. I sigh heavily. I swore to myself that, at the five year mark, I would give up my search and become an adult. I can’t search my whole life. 10

We reach the woods just in time. John Creave, Angelica’s twin, stands with his arms crossed. He’s angry that his sister was very nearly late. John looks just like Angelica; the only difference is figure and the privates obviously. He speaks nothing but English. John only uses Spanish when he’s furious. He comes over to us and glares at his sister. Angelica shrinks behind me and I meet John’s gaze.11

“Back down, John. Angelica was helping me again. I’m thankful that your sister helps me, unlike many of you!” I raise my voice so that everyone can hear me.12

“You all need to get out of the trees so we can start this meeting!” I call. Everyone comes out of the trees. The girls stand on the right of the clearing, the boys on the left. I walk over to the boys and start to examine them. I walk to the first of the boys. Josh Camden.13

“Mess up your hair.” I command. Josh messes his chocolate hair up with his tanned hands and grins. He’s six-foot with dark blue eyes. I walk around to the rest of the gang, examining them.14

1. Angelica Creave; 1815

2. John Creave; 1816

3. Josh Camden; 1717

4. Xavier Rodriguez; blond hair, blue eyes, five-foot-nine, 1818

5. Tyler Kliemann; black hair, green eyes, five-foot, 1419

6. Raven Samuels; deep red hair, dark blue eyes, very pale skin, five-foot-eight, 1520

7. Jesse Macdonald; shaggy blond hair, green eyes, four-foot-seven, 1321

8. James Percel; blue-black hair, gray eyes, six-foot, 1922

9. Jet Creader; brown hair, brown eyes, five-foot-nine, 2223

10. Nathan Maxwell; brown hair, blue eyes, six-foot-two, 3024

11. Shelby Jackson; brown hair, brown eyes, five-foot, 13 25

12. Nathaniel Maxwell; blond hair, blue eyes, five-foot-eleven, 2526

13. Richy Maxwell; brown hair, hazel eyes, five-foot-six, 1927

14. Robbie McGrath; red hair, black eyes, five-foot-four, 14 28

15. Travis Schmeltzer; black hair, brown eyes, five-foot-eleven, 29

16. Alicia Carter; purple hair, red eyes, four-foot-four, 1230

17. Roxas Way; white hair, steely-blue eyes, five-foot-eleven ½,31

18. Ray Baker; brown hair, brown eyes, five-foot-three, 1532

19. Mike Johnson; reddish-black hair, reddish-black eyes, six-foot-nine, 2133

20. Chad Byers; short black hair, ink-black eyes, six-foot-nine, 1534

21. Maria Inez; silver hair, silver eyes, six-foot-six, 1635

22. Jack Davis; red hair, blue eyes, five-foot-five, 1436

23. Peter Jefferson; brown hair, blue eyes, six-foot-ten, 1937

24. Me38

This is a list of the whole gang. We’ll let in those who can fight and are from twelve to thirty-three. When you’re older than that, you’re kicked out. I walk around the clearing impatiently. We were supposed to have new additions to make. The kids aren’t here yet. I turn to Xavier sharply and glare at him.39

“¿Dónde están los nuevos inductees? Usted se supone que debe asegurarse de que tienes aquí!” I hiss at him. Xavier looks at the ground guiltily.40

“Bueno…yo decirles a reunirse con nosotros…en medianoche.” Xavier mumbles. I stare at him in disbelief and anger. Everyone behind me gasps as they suddenly realize what he did.41

“Angelica, John! Come here!” I bark. The twins come over to me. I thrust a piece of paper at them.42

“Go get these kids right now. We need them to come now. If they try to refuse tell them that if they don’t come, they’re out.” I reply as calmly as I can while glaring at Xavier. My second in command let me down. Again. I sigh angrily as John and Angelica take off.43

“This has happened, how many times now? Ten. One more slip up Xavier, just one, and you’re gone. And you know what that means. Having to work and steal to survive. Having to do minor jobs, like cleaning up in a restaurant. Or you’ll have to join another gang. And you know how many fights we get into with the surrounding ones. I don’t want to have to fight you and I don’t want to have to take everything away from you, but slip up once more and I’ll have to.” I tell him. I turn away as the tears come. I hate to have people see me cry. I walk towards the woods and keep walking until the voices of my gang are out of earshot. I lean against a tree and slide to the ground as the tears slide down my face. I let out a sob. 44

Xavier is like my brother, like an older brother. Yes, we’re the same age. But Xavier protects me. 45

That’s why he’s second in command. I gave him a place to stay. With me. We both live at my house. Xavier’s seen me cry and knows how much I hate it. He always comforts me. If he’s around right now-No! Just shut up you stupid conscience! I scream in my head. I bring my knees up to my chest and wrap my arms around them. I lay my head down and sob. I do this occasionally because I hide my true emotions most times. I hear footsteps approach and bite my lips shut. When I look up, I see a man about twenty years old. But it isn’t Travis. I roll away and jump up, pulling my knife out in the process.46

“¿Quién es usted y cuál es su negocio aquí?” I command sharply. The man laughs and comes closer.47

“¿Y bien?” I demand. The man comes even closer and grabs my right arm. He pulls it down so that my knife is pointing behind me.48

“I’m sorry miss. I don’t speak Vietnamese.” The man sneers. I glare at him.49

“It’s Spanish, not Vietnamese. I take that as a great insult. Now, who are you and what is your business here?” I ask again.50

“The first isn’t important. I’m here to find a girl that was described to look just like you. Her name’s Elizabeth Rose Carver. Know her?” The man demands. I glare at him once more. The man tightens his grip on my arm and I wince.51

“I want your name before I give you any answer.” I reply. The man glares at me and I kick him in the shin. He lets go with a yelp and holds his shin.52

“El Loco Diablo Bromea, ven aquí ahora mismo!” I scream. I hear running footsteps and the whole gang comes running up. Everyone pulls out there own knives and create a circle around the man. I stand a little ahead of the gang, facing the man.53

“Who are you?” I demand of him. He stares up at me.54

“Sono Antonio Sanchez, uno dei Uptown bande italiane. Addio Uomini.” The man growls. My eyes widen in surprise. Addio Uomini, Goodbye Men, is a very respected gang uptown. I’ve met with them before. Because I know Spanish, I know Italian too. But I’m also part Italian.55

“Well, what are you doing here?” I ask kindly. Antonio glares at me as he stands up straight.56

“As I said, looking for a Ms. Elizabeth Rose Carver.” He spits.57

“Why are you looking for her?” I ask suspiciously.58

“Because my leader has something to settle with her.” Antonio replies. Angelica comes running in.59

“Lizzy! John ha sido herido!” Angelica screams. Antonio looks at me as I glare at Angelica.60

“So you’re Elizabeth. Why didn’t you say so in the first place?” Antonio asks me. I start examining him, ignoring his question. Antonio has ink-black hair worn long, violet eyes, and is about six-foot-seven. Just like dad. My vision blurs and I look at the ground.61

“Well?” Antonio demands and comes closer. I hear the growls and hisses from my gang.62

“Estancia en chicos. Esto es entre yo y Antonio.” I tell them. The gang backs up. I look back up at Antonio to find him a few inches away. Too close for comfort.63

“I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to know. How am I supposed to believe who you are?” I ask. Antonio comes until there’s only two inches between us. He raises his right hand and smacks me sharply. I stumble back and touch my face. Out of all of my wounds, none of them were ever on my face. The whole gang gasps and/or growls. The guys jump in front of me with their knives out and the girls put theirs away and help me up. 64

John comes running into the woods, his face having many bruises. He pulls out his own knife and glowers at Antonio.65

“What do you think you’re doing? You can’t just attack our leader!” John says angrily.66

“I didn’t attack her. I was showing Elizabeth what will happen if she doesn’t show people respect. My leader wants to settle something with yours.” Antonio says. The girls help me to stand up and I walk through the boys, towards Antonio.67

“Lizzy, you shouldn’t go near him. He hit you!” Xavier and Nathan tell me.68

“It’s alright. I might as well meet with your leader. Is it a he or a she?” I demand.69

“He. Dominic will be very pleased that you accepted his invitation.” My heart stops and my steps falter. Everyone behind me murmurs in disagreement and disgust and anger. Dominic is dad’s name.70

“D-Dominic? Dominic what?” I question. Antonio shakes his head at me.71

“That’s private. Sorry.” Antonio states. I shake my head and follow him out. 72

After a half hour of walking, we reach uptown. I see Addio Uomini up ahead. Their colors are that of Italy. Red, white, and green. I walk forward warily, watching the men. All of them are in their twenties and thirties and are highly skilled-more than me-at fighting. There are around fifty of them, all full or half Italian. Every single man has muscles, black hair worn long, black or violet eyes, and tanned skin. I stop right in front of them and cross my arms over my chest.73

“I heard that your leader had something to settle with me.” I say aloud. Fear restricts my chest when the strongest looking of the men comes forward. One, if I had to fight him, I would most certainly lose, and two, he looks just like dad in every single aspect. His hair is longer than the others’, his eyes are the same violet as mine; he’s wearing an emerald green shirt and black pants and shoes. He’s also wearing a leather jacket, like dad used to.74

“Dominic?” I ask. The man nods.75

“Elizabeth?” Dominic asks. I nod. He comes over and puts his arm around my shoulders. He leads me away.76

“I want to talk with you Elizabeth. This is very important.” Dominic says. I look up at him as we reach a neighborhood.77

“Tell me Dominic. Did you ever have any kids?” I question. Dominic nods and sighs.78

“Yes. One. A girl. She was as beautiful as you, maybe more maybe less. I don’t know. She got lost about five years ago.” He explains.79

“The same year I lost my parents.” I mumble. Dominic looks down at me.80

“What? You lost your parents?” I nod.81

“Yes. I was just about to join my gang when they were kidnapped. Followed the creeps who did it and beat the hell out of them. The police helped look but gave up after a year of searching. I’ve been looking all these years. But since the five year mark is coming up I’m going to have to move on, no matter how much I don’t want to.” I sigh. We reach a house and Dominic leads me inside. I stare up at him curiously.82

“This is a more private conversation. I don’t want my gang listening in Lizzy.” Dominic says. I hear a woman laugh from the kitchen in sad humor. She comes out and I feel another break in my heart. God, are there duplicates of my parents?! She has long black hair, violet eyes, and is wearing red and white. And I bet anything that her name is-83

“Teresa, what’s so funny?” Dominic asks. Another shock. Hit right on the spot.84

“Dominic, you’re always kidding around with me about how we’ll se Lizzy again. You know that that’ll-oh my god.” Teresa’s voice got hushed when she saw me.85

“Dominic, what is this?” Teresa asks in a quavering voice.86

“This is Elizabeth Rose Carver. She speaks Spanish and Italian. She’s the leader of a gang called El Loco Diablo Bromea.” Dominic explains. Teresa drops the plate in her hands and covers her mouth with them. With lightning quick speed, I catch the plate before it hits the ground. I hand it back to Teresa. She sets it on the table and looks me over.87

“Lizzy, is that really you?” Teresa asks me. I look back and forth from Dominic-with his arm around my shoulders-to Teresa-who’s hands are shaking. I decide to try something.88

“I. É eu É mãe, papá.” I say. They both grin. My family knows Portuguese too.89

“What did I just say?” I ask them.90

“It is I. It is I mama, papa.” They both say at once. I hug them both so tightly that when I release them, my parents are left breathless. Tears come to my eyes as I look over my parents. No injuries, nothing’s changed. I hear footsteps and a little boy comes running down the stairs. He glares at me as I watch him curiously. He sees dad.91

“Papá! Stai a casa!” The little boy screams. He speaks Italian. I stare at him and dad as he runs over to him. Dad picks the little boy up.92

“Yes. I’m home. Elijah, why don’t you speak English and say hello to your older sister!” Dad laughs. My eyes widen in joy and shock.93

“A little brother? Mama, papa, when did this happen?” I ask eagerly. Mom laughs at me.94

“Lizzy, we were planning to tell you after the pictures but, well, we were taken. What happened after that anyways?” She asks. I look at the floor in embarrassment.95

“Well, I sorta, kinda, beat up the guys that took you. That’s how I became leader of my gang.” I reply sheepishly. When I look up, mom is glaring at me angrily.96

“Elizabeth Rose Carver, how many times have I told you not to fight?” Mom demands angrily. I look at the ground as tears come.97

“Many times. Where’s your bathroom?” I ask, looking up at dad.98

“Second door on the right.” He answers gently. I walk down the hall and into the bathroom. I mop up my eyes and examine my face. There’s a very dark red mark. I’m surprised that dad didn’t notice. I wash my face off and stand there, looking into the mirror. My eyes are bloodshot like I haven’t slept in awhile-which I haven’t-and there are bags under my eyes. I hear mom and dad talking out in the hall.99

“Don’t you think you were too hard on her Teresa? She hasn’t seen us in five years. And to have you scold her for something like this when we just reunite. How do you think that makes her feel?” Dad says. Mom sighs.100

“I know. But fighting? We raised Lizzy better than that! She should know-”101

“Not to fight? We were gone for five years of her life. All Lizzy had was her gang! They were probably the closest thing to family that she’s had in the last five years!” Dad hisses, interrupting mom.102

“But Dominic, we raised Lizzy for the first thirteen years of her life. She should know! She was raised that violence was never the solution!” Mom points out.103

“Teresa, I’m the leader of a gang and I don’t see you objecting to that. But when it comes to Lizzy, who’s already eighteen, you have to scold her. Now answer my question. How do you think she feels?” Dad presses.104

“She must feel horrible that I don’t approve of it. And because I’m telling her off after seeing her for only a few minutes. What can I do?” Mom inquires.105

“Maybe you can make your chili. You know how she loves that. You also know that she never knew how to make it herself. Teresa, please.” Dad says. I hear their footsteps walk down the hall. I slump against the door and try to keep a sob from escaping. After taking a few deep breaths, I go back into the living room to see Elijah sitting on the floor. I walk past him and to the window. I stare out at the falling snow and the dark sky.106

“Sei veramente mia sorella?” Elijah asks me.107

“Sí. Mi sono vostra sorella.” I reply. A pair of arms wrap around my legs and I look down to see Elijah hugging my legs. I kneel down and pick him up.108

“You know kid, you’re lighter than most little kids I’ve picked up. You’re five, aren’t you?” I ask. Elijah grins and nods.109

“I’m going to be six next month. It’s cool.” Elijah confides. I smile at him.110

“So, are you the man of the house when papa’s out?” I ask. He nods again and sticks his thumb in his mouth. I laugh at my little brother. My cell phone rings and I answer it.111

“Elizabeth Rosa Carver haciendo uso de la palabra. Cómo puedo ayuladarlo?” I recite. 112

“Elisabetta, il suo tempo è quasi per essere una donna libera. Vi ricordate la promessa è fatta tre anni si fa?” A voice comes from the other end that I had hoped I wouldn’t hear for a long time. Dario Smith, the pure Italian leader of La Libera Gli Uomini, an Italian gang that I had gone to three years ago. In exchange for their help on getting me to the coast of Louisiana, I have to marry one of the Leader’s sons. Dario Smith has dark skin, black eyes, muscles, black hair, is five-foot-eleven, and is very cruel and tempered.113

“Sí, mi ricordo. Ma ho ancora a me i vostri figli. Non ho mai avuto la possibiltá di.” I reply. I set Elijah down and turn back to the window.114

“Sei non grado di rendere le condizioni. Potrai venire a nove questa mattina prossima.” Dario hisses. I sigh.115

“Va bene. Dove dovremmo incontrare?” I ask.116

“Vicolo del Nord. Da lì faremo il nostro cammino verso la mia casa.” Dario says. I agree and we hang up. Marriage at such a young age isn’t wise. Besides, will you even love this person? My conscience asks me. I shake my head angrily, sick and tired of my conscience bugging me. I go over to the couch and lay down. After a few minutes, I fall asleep.