Road Paint Yellow

It was just after midnight at Jenna’s house. The only light in the room where she lay on her bed was the dim light of the reading lamp. An old red candle sat next to it, half melted, unused. From outside the safety of her earphones and her bedroom door, she could hear Daniel and Janet fighting again; her parents in other words. Both friends to Jenna, and clearly not with each other. Obviously not typical parents to Jenna.1

At this noise she was reminded of the noise the adults made in the Charlie Brown cartoons. It wasn’t words, just noise, and usually yelling. Likewise, Jenna couldn’t hear the real words from outside her earphones. She just recognized the loud voices and the thumping of angry feet.2

Lying on her back in the shadows, she looked at herself. She was wearing navy, but in this light everything looked black. She looked at the hills that was her body; her knees, her stomach, her hands clasped together over that stomach, her feet. All of this had been growing ever since she was born. And now, it had stopped. Tonight, the metamorphosis was complete. She no longer felt like a kid. She didn’t know why it was this night in particular that she suddenly felt so much bigger, older, adult. But there it was. So much in fact it almost felt tangible to her.3

A door slam. Her brother had gotten in, obviously later than curfew. More high pitched yelling. The jazz music in Jenna’s ears seemed to go on endlessly. Fast, catchy, slow, crazy, chaotic, angry, tired. A long time, maybe an hour or so, went by before her CD player shut itself off when it had ended. She took off her earphones and felt an eerie sense of clarity. Everything was so silent. The light that she could generally see from under her door was now off. Jenna swung her legs off of her bed and stood up. She edged around her furniture and sleeping dog to try not to wake anything. The energy was incredibly low everywhere. She opened her door and stepped out into the hallway. The switch for the hallway light was still in the “on” position, yet the light was off. She figured it must have blown out after years of usage. She peered into her parents’ room. Her mother was asleep in bed and her father was dozing in his clothes on top of the covers. She looked to her left and saw her brother was sleeping on the couch. Everything was silent for once.4

Jenna’s heart began to pound faster as she was dazed. She ran downstairs into the kitchen and put a loaf of banana bread she had made in a brown paper bag. She glanced at her cell phone lying on the kitchen table and looked away. She instead grabbed the keys to her mother’s car. She took the bag of bread and left through the side door to the garage. She put the bag in the passenger’s seat and climbed into the driver’s seat. She started the car with an ignition that sounded dramatic. She pulled out more quickly than usual and left the street even quicker.5

Before long, she was a few streets down. The houses were smaller and the streetlights were out. She pulled into house #17 and stepped into the cold, damp air. This was the house of Jenna’s friend, Adam. After his big brother became a vegetable, his parents were never home and his fridge was always barren. Jenna always cooked for Adam and made sure he ate. She knocked three times on the front left window, Adam’s window. No response. She knocked again. Still no answer. Slowly and unsurely, she walked back to the car. She put the bread back in the passenger’s seat and drove away. 6

Jenna soon found herself on the highway going south. There were cars, but not many. There was mostly static as she multitasked with flipping through channels and eating chunks of banana bread. 7

She thought of school suddenly. It wasn’t like it wasn’t in session the next day. She debated whether she should stay out and skip it, or go home and be a good girl. In reality, she wanted neither. She wanted a completely different environment, which was the beauty and greatness of now. In the now, she didn’t have to be anybody. It was just a personal experience between herself and the yellow lines on the road. 8

An hour later, she pulled into an exit and into a town. It looked familiar, but she was unsure from what. She came up slowly to a huge estate and remembered. This was the college she had visited a few months back, the one that she had aspired to go to. She had recently released this dream. School and grades lately had been like poison. Apathy had made a home in Jenna and most of the rest of her graduating class. Things were too disagreeable to continue caring. Once next to this school, she wanted to go into a dorm and start living again. The change would be like ecstasy for her. Happiness to the fullest extent because she wouldn’t have to be herself anymore. A street light flickered above her car. On, off. On, off. There was a false glow around her now, making her red hair glimmer for an instant, then fade into darkness. This was an image that Jenna knew would be in her head for a while, even though the current state of everything was undeniably dreamlike. Slowly she pulled away and onto the highway once more. She told herself she would stay on the highway when, really and honestly, she was going home.9

Jenna got home at around six o’clock in the morning. The light was coming up and absolutely everything was covered with dew. She pulled into the garage quietly and grabbed the now half loaf of banana bread, leaving a few lonely crumbs on the passengers seat. Everyone was where she had left them upstairs. She spent thirty quiet minutes in the shower and washed off the remnants of the day before. When she turned the shower off, she heard the dainty footsteps of her mother moving around. She pulled her jeans and t-shirt on and took a deep breath. Opening the door, she stepped into the sun.