Soundtrack of My Life

Celine Dion’s powerful voice would come through the speakers – my mother singing along at the top of her lungs as she drummed on the steering wheel. “Wait for it, wait for it,” she would say. Shifting in my booster seat with anticipation I would sing the words I knew. 1

You were my strength when I was weak 2

You were my voice when I couldn't speak 3

You were my eyes when I couldn't see 4

You saw the best there was in me 5

Here it came!6

Lifted me up when I couldn't reach 7

My mom banged on the roof of the car with one hand. I was always afraid that she would bust through the rusty ceiling of the minivan. 8

You gave me faith 'coz you believed 9

I'm everything I am 10

Because you loved me11

From the time I was very small, I was told that this would be the song I will dance to with my father at my wedding. It’s the song that describes my relationship with my parents. They are the people I turn to for love and support in anything. Even through some of my rougher patches, they were always there. And always will be. I look forward to the father-daughter dance.12

Music has always been a big part of my life. I’ve been dancing since the age of four, and playing flute since 5th grade. It’s always been there, I’ve always been able to pick up on it, and it holds great meaning for me. 13

Then came the boy band phase and teeny boppers phase, complete with Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears. This was the first time when I could actually pick out my own music. There was nothing better than the thrill of buying a CD and being able to listen to the song I liked more than the one time I would hear it on the radio. I remember poorly choreographed routines to N’SYNC’s “Celebrity” and Britney Spears’ “Hit Me Baby (One More Time).” My best friend and I would spend hours to get one combination down. 14

“Walk, walk, pirouhette, kick, ball change, step, step.”15

“No, no! On ‘If I didn’t have cheese like every day’ there’s a little pause there. Try it again!” And we’d practice for hours in my room, and then come downstairs and perform on the deck for the parents. And they thought it was wonderful. I’m not ashamed to admit my boy band past! I still can’t hear one of those songs on the radio and not get all excited. THAT WAS MY CHILDHOOD!16

But I moved on from that too. We discovered A*Teens. I didn’t really like any CD but their ABBA one. At the time, I didn’t realize that I liked ABBA and not A*Teens. I meticulously tried to figure out the lyrics – leaning in close to the speakers to figure out one word. Is it “can hear a bell ring” or “tear up the ring?” This was before the Internet became so popular, so rather than Google searches, it was endless repetition. 17

Why did I want the lyrics so badly? So I could start my OWN ABBA tribute band, of course. My friends and I decided on a name, who would sing what part, who would play what instrument, and who our managers would be. This was before we realized that none of us could sing…18

Then came middle school – that rough time where you experiment with every kind of music as well as every kind of friendship. My life was so riddled with drama at this point that I turned to music like Evanescence and Avril Lavigne. Catchy and just angsty enough for me to sing along and make me feel better about my own life. And besides, they even had a couple curse words that I would sing as I giggled. There was nothing more fun than to sing “Complicated,” “Sk8er Boi,” or “Bring Me To Life” at the top of my lungs. Or listen to them on my brand new CD player. And they helped me get through friend troubles, confusing dating situations, and so many verbal fights. 19

Again, I grew up. The soundtrack of my life became more diverse as I made my way through high school. I discovered Top 40 music, as well as a lot of older stuff, Broadway musicals, and even band literature. I found myself absorbed by all different kinds of music, not hating much. As I learned to drive, there was nothing more fun than blasting Nelly Furtado’s “Promiscuous” or Justin Timberlake’s “Sexy Back” to drive my dad crazy. He can’t stand that kind of stuff. 20

I discovered that Weird Al’s “White and Nerdy” made me laugh and showed me another piece of myself. The part of me that isn’t afraid to show my nerdy side. Saving Jane’s “Girl Next Door” had much the same effect. 21

She’s the prom queen22

I’m in the marching band23

She’s the cheerleader24

I’m sitting in the stands25

How appropriate. Just the fact that it talked about a marching band made me like it – and the fact that I always felt left out. But I was figuring out what I really liked. I participated in a Rock and Roll Revival Show at school, where we performed rock and roll songs for sold out audiences. So songs like “Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy” still make me want to do that tap dance, and “Angie Baby” still gives me chills. Making a mosh pit for “Heartbreaker” and running around the auditorium dressed as an elf, playing piccolo for “Pied Piper” are memories that I will never forget.26

I still listen to Top 40 music. How can you argue with the beats and catchy tune of Katy Perry’s “I Kissed A Girl” or Pussycat Doll’s “When I Grow Up?” The next stage of music is Broadway. I know, I know, quite a jump…27

It started with Phantom of the Opera. Playing the sheet music in band led to my purchasing of the CD, which, obviously, led to my loving the music. Next came Wicked. Same story, with the addition of a good friend who forced me to listen to it. I can’t hear “For Good” without thinking of her, and how she really did change my life for good. 28

And now we come to present day. Idina Menzel dominates my playlists. Whether it is her incredible voice in Wicked, RENT, or her solo album “I Stand,” coming through my speakers, I am forever singing along (badly, I might add) in my car. “Brave,” “I Stand,” and “Better To Have Loved” evoke memories of late night drama club rehearsals for “The Diary of Anne Frank.” “Defying Gravity” brings back visions of practicing for Rock and Roll shows. And RENT reminds me of my trip to Texas, where my cousin and I rented the movie, and spend the next month singing along in her car. 29

My music tastes are diverse, my beats varied, and my dance moves much improved. But the simple fact remains that music is a dominant force in my life. And as I head off to college this year, I know my soundtrack will change and diversify even further. 30