Shipwreck

Missing image
SHIPWRECK1

My name is Lyle Kitchener. I’m 380. I’ve been on this ship…this…thing, ever since I can remember. And I’ll be the last one. We, my shipmates and I, my fellow humans, were the only ones to venture forth…and now there is no one left. So, I’m setting it all down. To no point…no end, really,…but I’m a chronicler…a recorder.2

It was foolish, in a way, ever to embark on this project but, I am supposing, we had to do it. It’s in the human spirit, is it not? Curiosity…the quests…the need to, as Browning said, reach! (“What’s a heaven for?”) And, exceed our grasp, we did.3

The journey began several thousand years ago, I don’t recall exactly how many the initial crew comprised; the records were burned, data banks in our computers, destroyed. But lives, generations, were spent on this very tub…this awesome, startling, creation. Our library rooms alone are daunting by virtue of their very physical size. We were self sustaining. We grew our food, procreated, educated our own and learned. We evolved. And we suffered. And now….4

Did I mention we were a fleet? Yes, we were. Masters of the galaxies. We were the lords of the Universe. So we thought.5

The idea was to take ourselves through our destiny…to the rim, the outer edge, the limits of this house. The ultimate object was to find a new home, a hospitable one, one which would accommodate us as the advanced civilization we had become. Of course it was not to be an easy task, but allow me to explain first what I mean by “advanced civilization.”6

It has long been posited by physicists, specifically one Nikolai Kardashev, in the mid nineteen hundreds (centuries ago) that essentially three, perhaps four, classes of civilizations exist. Type A is the first advanced class, having mastered its environment, conquered disease with a complete understanding of medicine, social problems, food distribution, basic physical and chemical technology, meteorology. In a Type A there is no more war, hunger, blight, no more crime, droughts, floods, fires, hurricanes, turmoil. Human age is on its way to becoming limitless. The oceans are tamed, explored, exploited. It is Eden, again. But this is not an end. It is a beginning; for the forces of a larger and more formidable solar system exist “outside” and loom inexorably.7

The Type B civilization is equipped to deal with this, our solar system. Type B has conquered space and the neighboring planets. It has harnessed the power and energies of its life-giving star and is ready, after thousands of years, to achieve, the physicist’s dream: the realization, and bringing to bear the fulfillment, of Type C…a civilization in possession and in command of vast stores of knowledge, of a complete chemistry, of a complete physics; skilled in the application of all its laws, and destined to reach beyond the galaxies…virtually, as the poet would say, beyond the stars! The energy for this will not come from the civilization’s home planet, nor its sun, but from any of the billions of stars in its universe. Type C is quite independent! So we thought.8

Earth attained Type A status in the year 2300…almost predictably. The achievement of Type B was agonizingly slower and did not occur for some three thousand years afterward. So far as I know, Type C has not been reached, and may never be reached (the anticipated gap between a Type B and Type C takes a geometric leap, and is upwards of 500,000 years) and to my knowledge, as I write this, Earth itself is long gone. We embraced our exploratory mission prematurely and in haste.9

Those who began this mission did so in extreme faith and commitment; always a danger, but necessary. Those departing the home planet knew they would never be returning, not in physical body. 10

There were incentives, however, and, as in all such ventures, there was excitement and the lure of the unknown. Additionally our early voyagers were old. They had enjoyed the equivalent of many lifetimes on Earth. And some felt they were going home.11

Life aboard the MESSENGER was almost normal. The ship was stocked with every possible provision, built to afford every conceivable luxury and convenience, including numerous theaters, gardens, libraries, schools, gymnasiums and parks. We even had an onboard lake and a football stadium. Soon, incredibly, we had a wonderful museum. A fleet of adjacent and trailing sister ships carried nothing more than streets and boulevards accessible to all. The difference was we were moving…and at enormous rates of speed. 12

We had no indication of what shall to this day still be referred to as the dark matter…. It was some kind of radiation belt we cut through for which the ship had had no protection. The field sliced through our many mainframes with no apparent damage other than destroying hundreds of data banks of records and technical material. We never knew quite what we had encountered.13

And then the fires started. There was no apparent reason for them but they erupted with no warning and carried a unique fury that was, although violent and frequent, short lived…but destructive. And then there were the event horizons which we, through good fortune, narrowly evaded but whose immense pull and ruinous forces took a formidable toll. Again, data banks were destroyed, sensitive calibrations ravaged, and delicate magnetic settings, that determined our course, thrown hopelessly out of kilter. 14

The rates of speed at which we traveled were exceeded by factors which, to our surprise, were difficult to measure. But at nearly ten percent the velocity of light strange variations in speed began to occur. Again, inexplicable. It was as if the ship were suddenly going…downhill; a kind of free fall.15

When the speeds increased and approached those of light, which we thought were absolute, we were aware (not physically, of course) of our body clocks (and all clocks aboard ship) slowing considerably. What to anyone earthbound would have been years were only minutes, if not less, to us. A few hours or days to anyone aboard our ship were years, even millennia, to those back home. Primarily we knew this by our reckoning and the constellations and stars we were passing. They were hundreds of light years away, yet we were navigating them in ostensibly far less time. Compared to us the rest of the universe was whizzing by.16

Wherever we were going, it appeared that we would get there sooner than anyone had imagined…and yet we seemed also to be going nowhere. We had passed an outpost beyond our local neighborhood of galaxies, the Virgo Cluster…some 60 million light years from where we started a mere few thousand years back…and the quasars. And, evidently at an ever increasing rate of speed, we appeared to be going…nowhere now. We saw and passed nothing. 17

It was shortly thereafter, looking back at a fading Virgo, that, I recall… people began to die. They were mysterious deaths, like the half lives of radioactive particles, brought about by nothing, arrested by nothing. And the bodies disintegrated. Vanished. I, was unaffected. 18

Our sister fleet fell behind into oblivion as well. One had apparently never made it beyond the particularly powerful and devastating event horizon of an invisible black hole. Only MESSENGER was left…with me at the helm...somehow invincible, but without apparent purpose.19

It has been days now, by my clock, weeks…for you, perhaps eons. I know the speed of the ship is vacillating. The instruments do not hold steady. I think she is picking up speed…if that is possible, but it is no longer possible to slow the ship. The retro rockets are long gone; the magnets have no potency; there is nothing against which we can repel this incomprehensibly accelerating momentum and movement…in whatever direction we are facing. My last hope lies in perhaps hitting some dark matter. But where that is and how it presents itself always has been, and, I think, forever will be, an enigma. Chances of slowing, even imperceptibly, seem slim.20

I could leave a date but it seems pointless. Time has lost meaning to me. Suffice it to say I’ve not recorded any of these strange events for what, might be some days. The void that I can recall since passing the Virgo Cluster has been depressing and debilitating, and has sapped my strength but yesterday for several hours I noted a bright flicker deep in the blackness ahead of the ship. It carries some hope, but it is puzzling because as of late, any flicker, any star before us shifted to blue as we neared it at speeds approaching that of light and then red shifted as we watched it recede. This did no more than flicker.21

No star, no galaxy, no light remained positioned before us, and our meteoric approach, for this length of time. Either the ship was slowing or this object was traveling faster than we were…hardly a possibility, or it was too far away to comprehend or… something else!22

One of the pieces of equipment aboard still in excellent functioning order was an old Hubble scope. It was optically many times superior to the early versions but still bore the proud name, Hubble. A prized feature of this model was its ability to determine the age of the light it reflected into the eyepiece. Was it five hundred year old light…and that many years away? Was it only one light year away? It revealed whether the sighted object, indeed, existed at all…or was it merely the target’s old, long reflected, light one was looking at. 23

Focusing on the object, a light flicker was noticeable and also a change in the red shift. The ship and I were gaining on it, although just barely. But there was something very strange about the image. For anything to be so far from us, its light was very young. At our rate of approaching speed, this object had to be light years away (lest we would soon be upon it and passing it)…its light would have to be several years old…yet it was not. And the Hubble also measured its size as incredibly small.24

For days there was little change in the object as we closed in on it. It almost appeared to be racing along with us through the ebony ether. The red shift, however, was becoming distinctly bluer. And our speed kept increasing…uncontrollably.25

186,000 miles per second is not merely the speed of light. It has been thought to be the absolute speed at which anything can travel. Light travels at this speed because light travels at the supposed fastest speed possible in this universe. Or so we thought. But we had neared this speed weeks ago when the braking systems failed. Our clocks slowed to almost no movement as our acceleration continued. Time had almost come to a halt for us as we coursed through infinity. As we approached the velocity of light, we were, in effect, traveling back through time, meeting light given off from stars and galaxies years and eons before. And if we were to surpass that “absolute” speed, we would overtake the light that shone upon all our histories…old light…that had not reached a final destination. Turning behind us, we could see history…; we could see ourselves taking off!26

If all this were not bizarre enough, the inexplicable occurred. What was left of our navigation monitors began showing our passage of constellations and nebulae, galaxies and clusters long since passed. Brilliant orange Arcturus in Bootes, no longer in the Milky Way, became visible once more, Deneb, the tail of Cygnus, initially some fifteen hundred light years away at the start of our journey went whizzing past. Rigel, at 850 light years distant at our voyage’s onset, the great star in Orion, momentarily flared and lit the surrounding dark sky. All a vast blur, the Milky Way, Andromeda, Fornax, The Magellenic Clouds and finally The Virgo Cluster and the quasars appeared, as if in the recap of a dream, then vanished. And the light, the mysterious flicker before us never left our screen. 27

At first I disassembled the equipment, finding nothing. The image persisted.28

And our speed increased.29

Today, my last day, I have finally understood. It is good this will finally be over. Nothing can exceed and defy the laws of the universe. Nothing can break the boundaries that confine us...without dire consequence. 30

At last I have fathomed why the object before us never wavered. I now knew why its light was young, why it never shifted from red to blue, why, a constant companion to this ship, it never receded before us. The object was not traveling faster than we were. We were not slowing. If anything we were traveling faster that the light…the gleam, and its source. I realized too late we would soon be upon it. And I could not slow the ship nor alter is course. As we passed Virgo and the quasars for the final time, and closed upon the object, I understood.31

The Universe is curved…a great globe of curved space. Countless trillions of miles…light years…but finite nonetheless…curved! We’ve been circling! It’s taken thousands of years, but we’ve gone in one, nearly infinite, circle…until recently. The speeds our ship attained broke absolute velocity and subsequently all physical law. I don’t know the final speeds we achieved. We passed ourselves. We left ourselves behind! The MESSENGER had attained a velocity which enabled the ship to pass everything that comprised it…everything that constituted its identity…. It passed itself, and in doing so, breaking through the barriers of time, unable to slow, is about to crash into itself, like a dog finally catching its tail. That floating mass of apparent detritus before us is the MESSENGER! She still travels at near light speed, but appears, to us, a derelict MESSENGER. We had broken all boundaries of space…and now Time, as well. I cannot slow the ship at these speeds. We are about to collide with the ship we have passed. We have doubled back upon ourselves and are about to collide with ourselves… with Time itself!32

I, Lyle Kitchener, captain of the MESSENGER, have reached the end of this voyage. And my ship, at her final speeds, has caught up with, and is momentarily about to overtake, Time. And Time… has caught up with the MESSENGER.33

Author notes

The story is by Gary Alexander...(Sunshine!)

A contest entry

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 83 of 83

  • Sheilasbabygal4life
    September 14

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    This was very interesting and very well written. I enjoyed reading this one.. Thanks so much for entering and best of luck to you in the contest...


  • Mike Driscoll jnr silver member
    September 13

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    A very....interesting take on space and time, i did for a minute think I was delving into the realms of a perverse Star Trek, but no, Its better than that (phew!). I found this so engaging and well written. Well done on being able to spring this idea and write about the universe like an expert!

    Mike


  • seasonsoflove silver member
    September 6
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    This is really good!!

    Plot: 4
    Language: 5
    Theme:4

    Total: 13


  • DecoDog
    September 2

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    this is a very interesting story and i can't wait until you write some more. Thankyou for posting on SW it was a good story. Please check for spelling mistakes and typos.

  • This is...wow, I really like it. It stands out and is very creative. It's a very interesting read and captivated me from beginging to end,
    Great job =]


  • Duke1985
    August 16

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    A good read to be sure. I noticed you drop a lot of comas, some of them are probably unnecessary but not a huge deal. I do the same thing and it seems like that's always the first thing that gets hammered.

    But enough about that. You got a great story here. The two things that stuck out the most for me was I enjoyed the stream of consciousness style its written in. I can see your main character sitting there all alone recording this all down.

    The next thing I'm a big fan of the fact the fall of civilization takes place on large spaceship. That's a very interesting concept. This is a very intelligent piece.

    The one thing I found lacking is I would have liked to see a bit more emotion from our narrator. Here he is up in space all alone, all his friends dead, living an unnaturally long and lonely life, hurtling to his doom. Sounds like the kind of thing that could drive you completely insane yet we don't get much of a emotional reaction as he recounts this harrowing tale.

    All in all very good thank you for entering my contest.


  • cole3313
    August 8
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    Wow that was really good! Great job.


  • Aqua-Chan
    July 27
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    A very good story, however, you did not read the rules. I asked for no stories over 1500 words. I apologize. :\

  • The is extraordinary. Good luck in my contest


  • Jennywinnie
    June 17

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    This is extremely creative. I like it alot.

    I liked your phrasing, and characterization of this guy, I really empithize with him.

    I'd be careful wih that first paragraph to not start it out My name is...and this is my dairy...it's been done alot. The rest is so very creative that you want to start off in a creative way too, so that you don't give off the wrong impession.

    I would also suggest that this i a good background for other stories. You could actually show us Dr Nikolai Kardashev, o create some charactr ad show how tey live being Type A, B, C ect.

    You seem to have a really great mind for sci-fi and I really enjoy it as well. Maybe sometime we can collaberate. Check out either my seeing murder series, or Wind's Bargain, if you read my stuff, those are the scifi-ish ones.

  • *speechless and in awe* that was awesome I was hanging on every single word. It's a great read.

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.

  • ZackTruel
    June 7
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    Wow, great story! Your imagination is extremely vivid, and you seem well-informed on many of the aspects involved in this story. Great idea, and it would be nice to be able to read osme of the stories involved in their journey since this is a fascinating world you have developed in this story. Great descriptive storyline!

  • Excellent

    This is a great story, should be continued.You have the knowledge and writing ability to carry this one off with out a hitch.Imagination out of this world.

  • I'll just tell you straight up that your a finalist. Usually I what till the very end of my comment to spring that on people but this one is different. You are a really good writer and I really enjoyed this a lot. Excellent detail and everything. A true science fiction in my opinion.

    Thank you fir entering this into my contest.

  • Again, I'm speechless.
    D:
    You are a tremendous writer.
    You had me hanging on every single word.

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.


  • Cupcake14
    May 20

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    Oh my.
    You really are a genius when it comes to science. You seem to be very interested in optics.
    But one thing I don't understand-can't the captain just divert? Can't he simply, i don't know, go somewhere else?
    And another thing-if the messenger is really travelling back in time to collide into its own self, that means the messenger should have been destroyed the moment they began the mission...because the messenger that had travelled back in time will collide into it! So that means the ship should have been destroyed right at the beginning of the mission...and the STORY WOULD NEVER HAVE HAPPENED!
    This is a confusing theory I know, but you're smart...I hope you can get it.
    Also, one thing-you are saying that the ship is travelling so fast that it is travelling back in time-because light is faster than time. But shouldn't it be travelling FORWARD in time? You say what was years for people became minutes for them. Doesn't that mean...all those hours they spent travelling...billions of years must have passed! In that case the messenger would continue an eternal cycle...spinning round and round the universe...my god...I think I'm too young to digest this all.
    Good job. I can't promise what trophy you will get at this stage, but you're a finalist!

  • I am stunned. I love the concept of the Universe being curved, and the idea of the MESSENGER breaking the barriers of time and actually achieving its demise by crashing into itself...

    Rather hard to wrap around when concentrating on it, but if read... lightly, for lack of a better word, it is easy to understand.

    I love the extra use of commas, as if conveying Lyle's exhaustion and apathy.

    All in all, an amazingly well-written story.

  • Nicely done! This was very well-written and, despite its length, it drew me in and kept me wanting more. Though it wasn't exactly what I was asking for. Although this did affect my mind very strongly and really made me think twice about things, I was looking for a story that would affect me more in the emotional way, like a puppy dying or someone killing themselves or something like that. It was a great story, but I don't think I can give you a medal for this. I don't know... we'll see. It all depends on how good the other entries are.

  • this is a very interesting piece that got my attention! It was a lot different then what I expected. Well done!!!!! Good luck in the contest, and thanks for entering.

    Hayle

  • 380 years old?! Wow... but good story


  • Igglepop
    April 11

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    Wow, that was good! Your style of writing is fantastic, and the whole idea was very intefesting. Thumbs up!


  • Missi
    April 5

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    Very interesting, Gary.I absolutely loved this piece. I liked how you created your own world upon the Messenger.For some reason I always believed that time was not a constant, this was amazing and normally I really dont enjoy reading sci-fi
    but yours was worth it.
    An amazing Piece. :}

    -Missi

  • Bobatron
    March 1

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    I liked it a lot. Although one of the effects of going the speed of light would be that the messenger and its crew would increase in mass as well but really that's a minor technicality.

    I also really liked the back-story you give a lot of detail about the type of community this ship is coming from. The captain's log type narrative you use for this piece really fits. The whole idea of this story is very good.

  • Rosewoolf
    February 24

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    Wow this is cool! It was really interesting. I loves stories like this and I absolutely loved what you have done here.


  • Doom Bunny
    February 24

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    I love stories like yours the plot was exalent it was well thought out it was perfect. the ending was just...well i'm speachless.

    beginning: 5, language: 4, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 4, characters: 4.


  • Atticus Unanimous
    February 24
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    Fascinating! I absolutely loved hlwhat you did here!


  • yumesandman
    February 15

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    This was a really interesting read. Not having a physics background save for a course in high school and the little details we cover in O-chem, it sounded pretty convincing too. It was something I hadn't read before, so I really liked it. One suggestion I would make is to rethink all the "..."; I used to do that a lot too, but sometimes a simple period can create just as much emphasis.

    Nice job!

  • TheDecree
    February 14

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    This was incredible. I am infatuated with space, the univers, the final frontier. I can't believe that they defied time, and they were basically going in a circle. This was a very interesting read. I could feel the eeriness as the Captain and everyone onboard was about to meet their doom. This totally stretched passed the galaxies and beyond.

    Well done. (:

    Good luck in my contest. (:


  • iliad
    February 10
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    And of course these!

  • iliad
    February 10

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    Wow. Now that was cool. Though I am not sure if this theory could work without running into a paradox, because if this were indeed possible, then you must also consider that if the messenger could hit the messenger before the messenger got a chance to hit the messenger then the narrator in your story could have not have told the story at all. It is the paradox of time travel itself, in that if it were possible, we would have seen it already. You also said that ships started to go down, and could that also have been the ships running into the other ships around the loop? This story plays with so many possibilities, its mindblowing. This is absolutely something I have never seen before.

    You have a startling use of language, a fantastic understanding of pacing, flow and an ability to show and not tell. I had no idea where this story was going until you brought me there, though I did have a feeling when you started talking about time going backwards, and the object being small.

    Really great write. Mindblowing and thought provoking. This kind of story was exactly what I hoping to find. Thank you for this. Really good work.

    Thank you for entering my contest.

    -iliad-


  • GrimDeath
    February 3

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    Very interest, the ideas and plot are well researched and developed. The background goes well with the story. Great Job! Thank you for entering and Good Luck!
    -Grim


  • Lois.Stone
    February 2
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    Fascinating, and beautifully written. Thank you!

    Loisxx

  • ertkcd
    January 30

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    Good JOb

    I did not just like it but got fascinated with what you write. I am about to be a big fan of your writings. You have the potential of an ''alive'' person which has been reflected on all of your writings.

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.

  • I read this and Deja vu. What is your aim?

    The story is captivating, but I also like detail. I understand the lack of but oh well. I am still curious at what you are aiming at. Maybe it's obvious I'm tired -_-


  • tallblondie gold member
    January 18

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    Time has a way of catching up with all of us - a bit like me catching up with the stories I promised to read. It may not happen straight away, but it does happen. Anyway...

    Entertaining story with just enough intellectual stimulation to keep me interested - and pondering whether or not such a premise is possible. I would think, that due to the universe forever expanding, that by circling around the entire universe, the passage would be mapped out as an ever increasing spiral, rather than a perfect circle. Just a thought - and possibly the only flaw in an otherwise well-written and researched tale. One question... have you developed a sudden love of the elipsis? I'm sure I haven't yet seen you use so many in one piece of writing. It does, however, seem to enhance the informal 'stream of consciousness' narrative this piece is written in.


  • Gagiikwe
    January 12
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    Nothing is without consequence

    "With God a day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years is but a day."

    beginning: 3, language: 3, plot: 2, ending: 3.

  • Angelshadow
    January 12

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    Reminds me of star treck....interesting story.

    I liked it...

    Quite interesting tale actually..

    I've read some of your stories before.


  • Anaya Roma
    January 11

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    EXCELLENT!

    Well written, well grounded in science, well thought-out. The journal of a sole survivor idea is not unique but certainly perfectly chosen to present the plot. This is clearly a scientific (vis-a-vis a philosophical) exposition of your previous work called Deja Vu Deja Vu. Very well done. Thank you.
    Applause! Take a bow!
    Anaya Roma

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.


  • Oleander
    January 10

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    Thanks for your entry into my contest. I haven't finished reading this, but will come back and read it more thoroughly and take my time later. So far, I like the concepts and imagination.


  • Ana-Andrea
    January 8

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    WOW

    I am impressed! That was really stunning... I felt as if I were watching some superior version of Star Trek. It was a captivating story - once I started reading it I couldn't stop. Splendid job with the time and space ideas and descriptions. I love the ending, too. It's brilliant!


  • welshsparky77
    January 2

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    Fantastically written and obviously well researched, although only time will show whether the theory is correct (certainly not in ours).

    Well done

    beginning: 4, language: 4, plot: 5, ending: 4, dialog: 4, characters: 4.


  • cad40324
    December 29, 2008

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    Interstellar

    Another masterpiece, if I may say so. This seemed meticulously researched and well thought out. Great write! Also, I like how it's not like WAY OUT THERE. The story seemed like it might actually be possible, and that in itself was exciting. Great write, again!


  • gocubsgo25 silver member
    December 27, 2008

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    I liked it.

    This actually seems like a pretty plausible story. Besides the possibility, it was very interesting. You could have been a bit more detailed on descriptions, but of course Kitchener was in his last days...moments...whatever and didn't have time to write the next great novel. I enjoyed it tremendously, and it captivated the reader as well for the most part.

    Nice job.

  • faeriestone
    December 16, 2008

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    I really enjoyed this story! It's the kind of science fiction I like to read, exploring the unknown, things yet to be discovered etc. Leaves the reader wanting more!

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 3, characters: 5.


  • wolf-storm
    December 15, 2008

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    Good story and a great ammount of detail. Thanks for putting it in the contest it was very fun to read.


  • scriptor
    December 14, 2008

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    Very interesting

    The ending is great! I, for the most part, held my interest. I know this was on purpose but you were rather vague about about the 'dark matter'. THe one problem i have with your story is that You speak of him noticing something for several hours and counting in days after you speak of time meaning nothing to him because the slowing of time due to the speed of the ship. It doesnt make since. Over all i like it. It was skillfully written


  • InksterMoxy
    December 13, 2008

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    wow

    that was amazing. I don't usually read sci-fi type stuff but I really enjoyed your piece. I felt like i was in the cock pit with Lyle and what a cool way to spend your life. I' have dreamt about becoming an astronaut. And you sort of uplift the desire to travel the galaxy while disowning it at the same time. Your writing style is very unique and attention keeping. I felt sad when it ended. And I was wonder, for clarification, Lyle dies when he says, "Time has caught up with the messenger..." This story was epic. Good job!

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.


  • Midnight-Engaged
    December 13, 2008

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    Wow! This was amazing. Thank you for having me read it. I must say, you push my mind to near the breaking point with these stories of yours. It's so well thought out. But it made me kind of sad. Everyone died and even the main character is now going to die, even though I doubt he cares.

    Truly incredible.


  • ForestFaery
    December 13, 2008
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    you were right there is enough sky lol thank you for entering! it was a great read


  • WaterBottle
    December 11, 2008

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    Amazing!

    This was so interesting to read, your story's concept is so innovative. The description of space was so vivid in my mind, I felt like I was in it! It was great how you incorporated the science of speed and the many different things taking place in outerspace throughout your story...so imaginative. (I can tell you know heaps about space.)
    When people began to disappear and strange occurances started happening,I briefly thought there was some type of alien encounter about to happen, but then I dismissed that thought because I knew you wouldn't come up with something so generic. How clueless of I, I'm so small-brained sometimes!
    The Messenger reliving time, traveling back into the past because there was nowhere else to go, was so genious.
    I love the whole idea of this story, the whole vibe of it and the real galaxies and constellations you mentioned, though I know NOTHING about outerspace, really. LOL!
    You're a magnificent writer--You have to get a book published, seriously!=)
    (P.S., I love how you described the main ship and all the other ships surrounding it having streets and avenues connecting to the main ship...a substitute world away from Mother Earth--really creative!)


  • Lawrie gold member
    December 10, 2008

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    I was so engrossed in this story I allowed my coffee to go cold.

    I will admit here and now, I am not an educated man when it comes to physics, but science fiction I enjoy.

    The main reason for my enjoyment of this particular story is the fact it is not as far-fetched as some of the sci-fi I have watched and read lately.

    Lyle Kitchener is believable up to a point. Unless his mind and/or psyche are advanced beyond what we imagine then I would have thought he would have gone mad living alone for so long. Also, being confined to an albeit immense ship throughout so many generations with limited people would they, and him, be inbred by now with characteristic traits. Perhaps that has been overcome with the advance in medicine.

    At one point in the story I thought perhaps the ship had broken the speed of light somehow and was now travelling backwards in time but evidently not. I wonder if the ship that Lyle is gaining on and about to crash into is carrying the original crew - an interesting thought.

    Anyway, enough of this layman's ramblings. I enjoyed this monologue from Lyle Kitchener. The descriptions given are awesome and your knowledge of this subject shows up well.

    How anyone can be critical of a few commas here and there after reading such a well executed story is beyond my powers of reasoning.

    As with any good sci-fi write, this story leaves me with many thoughts to mull over such as, is there another curved universe wrapped around ours?

    An enjoyable read of a well formulated story that had me engrossed from beginning to end as well as one that leaves me with no criticisms to make.

    Now for a hot cup of coffee while I allow my mind to wander.

    Thanks for sharing this wonderful write.

    Lawrie





    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.


    • Gary Alexander silver member
      December 10, 2008

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      HEREIN, BELOW, FIND MY PERSONAL CHIT!

      Consider me in debt to you for at least one cup of good coffee!
      Thanks for the kind and thoughful comments...and, of course, for taking the time and effort to read SHIPWRECK.
      GA


  • RxxSpiritWolfxxJ
    December 10, 2008

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    Let me first say that I've never figured you for a scifi kinda guy, but now that you've written this - you've done extremely well!
    Your ideas, your backstory, and your narration of the story is impeccable and reflect the scifi sense - dunno what that means, - but your story felt right. It was a pleasure to read something original and something that drew its inspirations from real-world physics theories. Great stuff, Gary. The way in which you set out the story, starting at the end and going back through the eyes of the doomed captain hadme hooked from the start.

    Once again, you've surpassed yourself.

    Thanks for the enjoyable read.

    RJ


    • Gary Alexander silver member
      December 10, 2008
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      Thank you, RJ

      You're invited to join us for the hot coffee as well!
      Best,
      GA


  • Taliesa silver member
    December 9, 2008

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    very interesting

    I really like the use of science here. I suppose Kardashev is a real guy? I've not heard of him, but it is plausible that someone would posit a theory of advanced societies. if this is your invention, all the better. I especially liked the description of passing the stars and galaxies in p27.
    The concept and conclusion were also quite satisfying. I'm a little put off by the absence of cause and effect in the development of the journey--kinda 2001 without Hal--but overall, a good write.

    beginning: 3, language: 3, plot: 4, ending: 4.


  • Drac
    December 7, 2008

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    Wow, a very well written story that really just pulls you in!
    And I like the fact that I recognize many of the things you write about from physics class... never thought I'd remember that
    But yeah, it's excellent, and written in a way that is both descriptive and easy to read And when you mix fiction with laws of fact like this, it just seems so much more real and so very good
    Well done

    beginning: 4, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 4, characters: 4.


  • Lithron
    December 6, 2008

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    Exellent!!! Very good!! I think this was better then DÉJÀ VU DEJA VU. You are truely a brilliant author. Thankyou are writing.

  • condor
    December 6, 2008
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    This is an absolute brilliant write. You captured the essence of time itself, of the futility of the ages and how things eventually come back to you. I loved your description of travelling on the messenger and how you gave us a glimpse of the star systems and their place in the universe. I loved your description of the planes of existance and how they fitted into the scope of time. Time seems to have stood still for all, even the Messenger stood still and watched itself whiz by although it was travelling way beyond what could ever be imagined and was catching itself as it continued in its edless circle. Your thoughts of Lyle Kitchener really took us on an amazing journey through time and space and to the edge of existance. I often wonder what would be on the other side, if indeed there is an end which i cannot comprehend as not being. A wonderfully mastered piece of work that kept me intrigued right to the very end. I would believe that this would have made a great story on allwrite and perhaps i wonder, whether you may not have a thought on doing anymore with this. Once again, a brilliant piece of work. Thank you for the read.


  • Azaradelle Moderators member
    December 5, 2008

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    Excellent!

    Not a genre I usually enjoy, but you definitely pulled it off.
    I liked the sense of urgency in the main character's tone, and couldn't help but notice the amount of research you must have done for the piece! That weaved with your imagination, made the tale extremely enjoyable.
    Glad I read this.

    Yrs.

    Azaradelle.


  • one-winged- angel
    December 4, 2008
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    WOW


  • silent dances
    December 4, 2008

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    Wow, I really enjoyed this alot. I accually predicted that in the end then he would have gone in a circle but I did not think that he would run into his own ship. It is an interesting fate, one I'm sure he welcomes after all that time. Also, I agree, I do not think that there is anyway for humans to dominate the universe.

    Really good, and well writted. I liked it alot. ^_^


  • Olinda
    December 3, 2008
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    Here we go now...

    I hope the yello dudes work lol


  • Andy Stephenson gold member
    December 3, 2008

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    Interesting

    The story is told throughout with a sense of urgancy. Lyle Kitchener wants to finish the report before it is too late, though he is not certain who it is for. I suppose when the Messenger catches up with itself, it will be destroyed?

    This story seems a little confusing to me.

    Andy

    • Gary Alexander silver member
      December 3, 2008
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      I DON'T BELIEVE...FOR A MOMENT...

      That you, Andy, are confused at all! You like to say that...from time to time...in your humility, but I don't buy it! Of course, incidentally (lol!) the MESSENGER will be destroyed when push comes to "shove"...(lol)...but hence the title "SHIPWRECK!"
      Thanks for reading. Should there have been any "confusion"...I trust this clears it.
      GA


  • gezza gold member
    December 3, 2008

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    About Time

    Gary,

    A fine, classic-style science fiction - well researched and full of wonderful images of astronomical phenomena. I loved it.

    The topic, on the surface, looked like one that I have read before in the classics - I can't remember exactly who wrote it, but I remember a wonderful short story about a ship that travelled into the future and, despite heroic adventures, etc, was blasted into nothing by their own civilisation from the future - there delta of time made it impossible to communicate with each other. I was thinking this was going to be a bit like that, but perhaps in terms of travelling backwards.

    But no, this is different because it adds the curved universe concept - and all combined, makes it compelling, chilling, and poignant. While often you reflect on the greater picture toward the end of your stories, interestingly enough, for the reader, remembering the beginning of your story, and in particular the dissertation on the types of civilisations, indicates to me that you chose that part of the story to do this reflection. This also makes it unique.

    Thanks for the read Gary - you have demonstrated again, like Stentor, that you have versatility as a writer. I tip my hat to that.

    A final editorial comment - I think para22 needs a slight tweak to make clearer - but honestly, I find no editorial issue beyond that.

    well done!

    G

  • hawkeslake
    December 2, 2008
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    Me, too! I tried to edit them back in, but no go. So here they are!

  • hawkeslake
    December 2, 2008

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    Nicely suspenseful and puzzling right up to the end. Your beautiful descriptions of space and time are definitely worth reading a second time. I also loved the levels of civilization; wish we could even approach A! The flow of the story as the floating world begins to deteriorate is convincing and sad. Poor protagonist, left all alone to figure out the problem by himself, and able only to share in his log. A great read. Thanks for alerting me!


  • Viola.King
    December 2, 2008
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    Oops. I forgot this.

  • Viola.King
    December 2, 2008

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    Hm. Possible? Maybe. Believable? Sure. I do think this piece was well executed - well written, in any case (as usual). The use of ellipses was a bit extensive in some parts, though, as well as the use of exclamation points. I also think this sounds too much like a recount to be a revelation for Lyle; maybe a bit more feeling could be inserted? And as Trillian asked, I also wondered by Lyle was the last one alive - are we supposed to find out why? In any case, I enjoyed reading this piece; it really made me think about both time and the fate of humanity. Are we too ambitious in our explorations, or will we be in the future, when overreaching ourselves could end in our destruction?
    Great work, GA
    --Vi

  • Olinda
    December 2, 2008

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    This is an amazing story. Really. I loved it from the beginning sentence to the stunning end. I couldn't rip my eyes off, and luckily you were kind enough to create a background and font color that my terrible eyes agreed to.

    Anywho, I loved this. It sounded so... Time Machine/ Utopia, amazing.

    The Universe is curved…a great globe of curved space. Countless trillions of miles…light years…but finite nonetheless…curved! We’ve been circling! It’s taken thousands of years, but we’ve gone in one, nearly infinite, circle…until recently. The speeds our ship attained broke absolute velocity and subsequently all physical law. I don’t know the final speeds we achieved. We passed ourselves. We left ourselves behind!

    That was the best. Great description, and plot.

    Thank you for the story!

    Oli


  • Trillian
    December 2, 2008

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    Hi Gary.
    Haven't done much on this site as of late... I just happened to log on today, I haven't been keeping up much lately (oops). I'm really into doctor who so I'm generally cool with sci fi, though I don't read all that much of it.
    Anyway back to commenting on your story!
    It's a great idea. Reminds me a bit of the movie Event Horizon though the actual story does not have much in common with yours...
    The matter of time has always been an interesting one, no? Very interesting ideas indeed... I did have a question; why did the people die the mysterious deaths? Was it because they were nearing their past selves or is theres simply something I missed? And maybe you should provide a reason for why the main character was invincible... Or is that meant to remain a mystery?
    Superb job, two thumbs up.

    T

  • daftweejimmy gold member
    December 2, 2008

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    Hmmm.....

    I quite like the idea, but I can't say I liked the execution. I felt that this was an experimental piece, or at best a bit of facetiousness; there was certainly nothing to take seriously.

    I suspect we've heard too much of Steven Hawkings and the Richard Pullman novels. I got no shred of faith in the ultimate theory here, and it wasn't at all convincing. Incidentally, why do you torture the common comma? Without going through it again, I'd say there were at least a dozen extraneous commas here; is this deliberate.

    You're not an Isaac Asimov in disguise, and I think Jules verne can sleep soundly in his grave.


  • Rosemary silver member
    December 2, 2008

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    Interesting concept

    I thought your story was a good outlet for your theory about space and time.
    I was hoping I would get to know Lyle Kitchener a little more by way of what he was feeling. I thought he might go mad being alone and isolated for such a long period of time. In the end I thought time caught up with Lyle in a metaphorical way. Maybe he did go mad.


  • Mel-the-Believer
    December 2, 2008

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    Man, this was utterly captivating. I love the narration of it. Excellently written. I loved it. You wrote this very well. Keep up the awesome writing. God Bless!


  • Valkyrie silver member
    December 2, 2008

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    See, see? No matter how fast you run, you can never escape yourself! Hahaha! In fact, the faster you run, the messier it gets, it seems. I enjoyed your piece immensely. I thought for a bit that you were trying to go back in time and crash into the Big Bang or something, with the passing again of the stars, and that the "flicker" was the Bang itself, in the distance...ah well, I'm not really up on my Theories of the Universe. I loved how you ended the story: very dramatic. A few extra commas here and there, and the first sentence in p24 was worded a bit awkwardly; otherwise, A-ok.
    So, what happened to the other ships? The ran into themselves and that's why they disappeared too? Hmmm...would that make one debris cloud, or two?
    Very cool story; I love the tone you write these tales with, Gary!

    • slashinguk
      December 2, 2008
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      I enjoy the evolution of commentary here. The first few said take out the commas, now it's come full circle and you're suggesting to add more!

      • Valkyrie silver member
        December 2, 2008
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        Oopsie. I meant there already ARE a few extra commas here and there. So much for the commentary being clear. I think it must have been a mutation in the evolutionary process. Hopefully it won't reproduce.

  • shan700
    December 2, 2008

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    Good as ever, very nicely written. Loved the last line, "And Time...has caught up with the MESSENGER"

  • slashinguk
    December 2, 2008

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    Good story - mostly good physics

    Para 16 - the effect of time dilation would normally be described as a shrinking of the universe ahead of the vessel, rather than as a slowing of time. Rather than appearing to change time, all distances are "foreshortened" at relativistic observer speeds. Your description is workably accurate, just unorthodox.

    Para 21 - the star colours would shift from blue to red as they pass the ship. Everything in front would be blue shifted.

    Para 26 - again, the clocks would never appear to slow down as perceived by an observer in the same time (velocity) frame.

    I found the ending unsurprising from paragraph 23 and paragraph 24 supported my suspicions.

    Sorry - but you've picked an astrophysicist to review this one and I have to pick holes in the science. As you approach the speed of light, you effectively compress space into a smaller and smaller volume until, hitting the speed of light, time stops and you effectively teleport (in your own frame of reference). So, for a photon (a particle of light) the moment of departure from one source is the same instant of arrival at its eventual destination and all of space shrinks to accomodate the jump.

    You picked up most of the physical concepts well enough and, so long as you kept the velocities below the speed of light, this would be workable.

    This fits nicely into the genre of works I'm reading right now - the short stories of J G Ballard. I don't know if you're familiar with them, but the style is very applicable to your own writing. Take a science concept and stretch it to the utmost, while wrapping in some character and story line.

    I applaud your writing, the opening is just about enough to pull me into to reading the whole piece, but the tale of the journey to date is a little over long for my liking and many parts are not pertinent to the overall story (a museum?).

    The Type A through C civilisation descriptions are interesting, but again not pertinent to the plot. Maybe they could be made more so somehow.


  • Terry Collett
    December 2, 2008

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    Inpressive story.

    This is a good and solid work of prose. It has your fine touch and the theme captivates from the go.


  • callthexylophone
    December 1, 2008

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    Wow! Very impressed with your usage of red shift, event horizon, and 186,000 m/second.
    Yay from a physics student!
    From a grammar student, I know it's supposed to be like a stenograph of a voice recording, but there are a bunch of commas that are out of place.
    Otherwise, two thumbs up.


  • DylanBranson
    December 1, 2008

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    Holy cow, I absolutely loved this piece. I liked how you created your own world upon the Messenger. I always find that sort of thing interesting, seeing how people adapt to different situations, especially something like this. All of the science used was great too, and I found the Civilization Ranking to be quite interesting in itself. A marvelous piece.


  • Elisabeth gold member
    December 1, 2008

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    Very interesting, Gary. It may, in fact, be possible, if you take into account the theory/ies which state that time moves both forwards and backwards. I've always believed that Time is not a constant.

    At first, I thought you were writing an imitation of "Battlestar Galactica."

    I found this quite fascinating to read, though a little editing to remove excess commas would be a recommendation I would make.

    In Para 24, I was jarred a little by 'ever so slightly'

    There is power and strength, without platitudes and padding, in this piece.

    A really terrific read! Thanks Gary, I'm coming back for a second read soon

    Lis.

    beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, dialog: 5, characters: 5.

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