A chat before supper. (chapter one)

My name is Conell I'm 20 years of age and I am a Vampire. What am i suppose to say, poor me I didt want this the cliche "what am I going to due i never wanted this" Well you wrong inmany ways to say that. 1

I'l be blunt to you I wanted this I had a choice really I didt even need to be almost sucked dry to make it, Humans are weak stupid they folow pity trends that make me sick, i hated them even before the new me. Now I kill them and enjoy it with a great passion, to me death is a hobbie. Every night I wake up and i look forward to my meal or if i have company liek i sometimes do ,meals. 2

I find it funny vampires are the "In" with humans these days all those stupid little kiddies running around in black saying how sweet it would be to be like me a GOD!!!They can never be me or even us they are weak they have feelings abotu death and horror. 3

Those discuseing rags the Twilight books never helped our image much either, I would love wipe my ass with those one day but I cant even to this day bring myself to look at one no less soil my the skin of my ass with a page of such scum. 4

So what do you think of me so far find me evil do you ,sickning maybe. Well good I like you scared hell try run away i love a good hunt nothing better then a feisty meal. but if you dont I'l take my time killing you and that is also a lot of fun , killing is an artform. But before things get messy lets have a little chat shall we. Oh now dont scream if you do decide to not heed my warning i'l cut out your tongue and have a bit of a snack why we chat. 5

So let me tell you about the start of me being me it's not that exciting i wasnt planing it but hey who does really.
Matt and I a dearly departed freind were down in New Orleans wandering around geting drunk nice summer evening why would we not. 6

So we wander down the wrong ally, and here is this woman a little older then I. A wonderful creature she is long red hair gray green eyes and the figure of a godess. I saw her and I saw my other half the woman of my dreams. Then all of a sudden we are jumped from above two men "well not like this was before i knew what they were" pin us against the wall and just before they bite I laugh. 7

Now you can imagine what they must have felt being laughed at.
Then girl her eyes with such death in them looks at me "whats so funny human" And when she growls and I can see those teeth there perfect. I look at them and when i calm down from laughing and say "well your real thats funny and your evil thats great!8

During all this poor Matt had wet himself and started to cry like a child. And as there shock made the grip slacken I wrenched my self free and jumped behind matt grabbing the knife I always had on me in the city. When I puled it out the bloodsuckers laughed as I would seeing such a silly sight. The godess laughed said "do you think that wil stop us from killing you."9

Putting the blade to Matt's neck and smiled. "why would I ever think this would stop you from killing me, but lets see if feedig will." Then I sliced his throat and held him up so the girl could get drink.10

So here we are haveing a chat at the dinner table together. and since you have lived longer then any one else at this table by being a good human you will live a little bit longer while i keep telling you about my new life.11