Paper Angels

     After every day-after-Thanksgiving sale the malls just ain't complete
     Without a bunch of decorations and a paper angel tree
     There's artificial smiles on artificial tree limbs
     Saying what she'd love to have and what to buy for him1

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Browsing the mall the weekend after Thanksgiving I see such a familiar site.  Decorations of red, green and gold are everywhere. Hand drawn snowflakes cover small window displays. Christmas trees stand in each store’s large window with a plastic Santa at its side. Boxes wrapped in shiny bright colors cover the floor of the displays. Above the milling crowds garland hangs with bells of gold and bows of red arranged just right.
A tree stands just feet away from Santa covered in paper angels with wings and halos lined in gold glitter. Upon closer inspection each of these angels has a name and an age of a little girl or boy on the front. On the back resides a list of clothing sizes and some of their Christmas wish list to Santa. Quickly I choose two, a girl and a boy. Hoping that with just a bit of money I can help to place a smile upon their face Christmas morning. 3


     Well I hope Maggie likes her new winter clothes and her buggy with baby doll 4

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My heart goes out to young Maggie who’s just 6 years old and my mind wonders what colors she likes and who her favorite character is. She doesn’t ask for much; some new winter clothes and a buggy with a baby doll. I’m sure her coat is threadbare and her school clothes have holes in the knees. I can see her playing with a baby doll that’s been passed down through the years; old and ragged with hair cut wild and stiff.
Rushing to the most popular girl’s clothing store, I purchase her a pair of jeans and a long wool skirt along with some long sleeve tops and a sweater or two. Remembering a baby doll I had seen in the window of the mall’s toy store I quickly went back. There she was lying in a beautiful blue buggy, her dress a simple yellow with roses; alongside the buggy was a bag filled with all things a good little mommy needed for her baby doll. With a smile I grabbed all of it up and purchased each piece with love and care.6


     And maybe Tom'll smile with his new Nike shoes when he shoots that          basketball7


Now onto athletic Tom, the 11 year old boy who has to have a favorite basketball team he wants to wear. He asks for little as well; a simple pair of Nike shoes and a basketball. I’m sure his shoes have holes and the souls are thin. I can see him playing basketball only when another provides the ball for his has worn thin and no longer holds air.
Knowing just where to go I quickly find some shoes. Quickly I find a nice looking pair of Nike Air Flight Skool Men's Quickstrike Basketball Shoes, yeah I know it’s not like its Air Force One’s but on my small budget it’s what I can do. While there in the store I just can’t help myself and find a Celtics Jersey that matches the shoes and buy it as well. Now onto the sporting goods store down the hall for the last thing young Tom has asked for, a basketball. I walk in and am overwhelmed, I have no clue about best quality for decent price when it comes to sport equipment. Asking a saleslady I quickly find a Wilson’s NCAA street addition that well fits my price range and a pump as well and add them to my already full load of gifts.8


     I can't help but wishing that I could do more
     But not just while I'm shopping in the department store9


Taking all my purchases home I look at what I have gotten. Simple hopes and dreams, the needs and wants of a desperate girl and boy written on paper angels are what I bought today. Thinking of the lives these children may be leading I want to do more. 10


     Paper angels you're in my thoughts and prayers
     No matter where you are right now remember God's right there
     He's asking all of us to help take care
     Of his paper angels everywhere11


Taking the sweet little angels in my hands I kneel amidst all the materialism I have gotten for them and send a prayer to God that these children are safe, loved and well cared for. It’s all I can do and the prayer repeats within my head as I wrap the little gifts one by one and place them within beautiful Christmas gift bags. Placing the bags by the door to go to the Salvation Army the next day I know I’ve done my best.
That night laying my head down upon my soft pillow to sleep, my mind and heart travel to the bags by the door. Jumping up I run to them quickly grabbing the paper angels and kneeling beside my bed I place the angels in my Bible and pray for Maggie and Tom once more. Climbing into my bed both children were still heavy on my heart.12


     Going through the mail almost every afternoon I see a Mom and Dad's        worst dream
     There on the back of a money-saving ad to get my carpet cleaned
     Height, weight, hair, eyes, date missing, and DOB
     A child's name, a picture, and the words 'have you seen me?13


After visiting friends but before my trip home I drop off the gift bags with the paper angels stapled to the sides at the local Salvation Army and send off one more quick prayer for my little paper angels. Driving the long distance home I listen to the radio and sing some Christmas songs along with Jimmy Wayne on the radio. Stopping at the mail boxes I jump out into the cold and grab my mail for the week. Jumping back into the car I start thumbing through it one by one; bill, junk, bill, junk, junk, junk, catalog, junk. I flip each one on to the seat beside me.
Suddenly one catches my eye as it lands face down on the seat. Staring up from it is a beautiful little girl. Picking the flyer back up I flip it over and it’s from the local carpet cleaning company. A coupon offering me a free room cleaning if I purchase 2 other room cleanings is what I saw.
Flipping again to the back my heart went out to this beautiful child. Reading what it said I saw she was only 4 years old with hair of red copper and eyes of green. She was tall for her age and a healthy girl and had been missing for a month now last seen with her trusted babysitter who has since lost the family trust. Her name is Alainn Cara Murphy, a beautiful name to match her beautiful face. The heart wrenching words “Have you seen me?” in bold completed the flyer.14

     Paper angels you're in my thoughts and prayers
     No matter where you are right now remember God's right there
     He's asking all of us to help take care
     Of his paper angels everywhere15

Driving to the back of the apartment complex I park my car outside of my little apartment, grab my mail and rush in, escaping the cold. Going through my mail one more time the lost child’s eyes pleaded for me to help her. Placing all my mail on the counter except her sweet face I walked into the living room and to my knees I dropped. I talk to God again of Maggie and Tom and a Merry Christmas and happy life for them.
This time I add in prayers of sweet Alainn Cara Murphy and her parents. I pray for the babysitter as well. I pray the sitter’s heart opens wide and she sees the mistake she made. I pray she turns around and returns that sweet cherub to her grieving parents. I pray that the angel on the paper I hold is happy and healthy wherever she may be.16


     His documented bruises fill a folder in a file17


Returning to work on Monday, I see more bruises and speak quietly to Phillip about it. His quick and practiced replies are so run of the mill; he fell from his bike is the answer this time. Making quick notes of the bruises I saw and the talk we had I place it in my drawer to be filed when free. My mind doesn’t leave the bruise and I set about teaching and assigning the days work. Once all the work is assigned and the daily attendance is done I pull out my notes on the conversation with Phillip and reread it. Pulling his folder from my cabinet I flip through and see all the notes I’ve made on bruises and comments on the calls made to child services.18


     She's a second grade self-portrait drawn without a smile19


The students are drawing themselves on Thanksgiving Day and as I walk about the room I see one so sad. The hair is ebony waves and the eyes are deep sienna her lips that should be smiling a coral rose. I know living with her grandmother and helping to raise her younger brother and sister has always been tough for sweet Kima. Yet, her eyes are normally smiling and her lips filled with laughter. This picture makes me wonder what happened each day she was home for Thanksgiving Break.20


     And every town is littered with this kind of debris
     We've got to stop this madness and it's up to you and me.21

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At the end of the day I think over what I’ve seen and am saddened. Each child I have with bruises caused by human hands and each child that finds no reason to smile about a day away from school has matches about the state, nation, and world. I am only one person who wants to do so much to help these angels within my classes and do all I can. It’s going to take all of us working hand in hand to help the children we see and know.24


     Paper angels you're in my thoughts and prayers
     No matter where you are right now remember God's right there
     He's asking all of us to help take care
     Of his paper angels everywhere
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At bedtime again my mind is filled with children: all the paper angels I’ve seen within the past few days; the two with halos and wings, the one who is missing and wants to be found, and the two within my files at school who I freely hug. These paper angels need so much from the world and yet I am just one. So as I kneel down upon my knees, bow my head and close my eyes I hand each one over to God. With his help these paper angels and all the paper angels from everywhere shall be helped in time.28