A soft rustle broke the moonlit silence. The trees were still, unmoving; the source of the noise could not be determined. A dark shape flitted between the elongated shadows, and as it moved, the rustling came again.1
A small, dirty hand cautiously crept around a tree trunk, pausing at an age-blackened knothole. The face of a small girl emerged from the darkness of the tree's shadow, peering about suspiciously. Then, suddenly, the face and hand were gone, and the rustling returned.2
A small breeze whispered through the branches, spreading them just enough to allow a little moonlight on the forest floor. Two bare, muddy feet brushed through the dead leaves on the ground.3
The girl, running in confused, disoriented patterns, stopped for breath. As she stood there panting, an eerie bird cry echoed through the tree. Startled, her eyes darted quickly from side to side.4
With a small gasping sound--the sharp intake of breath not yet caught--the girl resumed her run.5
The rustling of her bare feet against the fallen leaves was the only accompaniment to the sound of her heart beating against her chest. Eventually, it was joined by another bird cry; the shriek of its prey was soft in comparison.6
Soon the girl saw that she was approaching a small opening in the trees--a gap. With a sigh of relief, she quickened her pace. Finally, she had found a way out of the woods. Finally, she had an escape.7
But as she burst through the gap, she realized that she was mistaken.8
Her bare feet, still accustomed to the feel of crunching leaves and pine needles, slowly stepped forward; the soft, damp, upturned earth between her toes felt strangely hostile, and the fog that clung to the ground swirled heavily.9
The girl gazed about her, walking with faltering steps. Her eyes wide with horror and disbelief.10
Bodies littered the ground, ghostly white in the light of the moon. The fog embraced their lifeless forms; the shadows gave them deathly silhouettes.11
The snap of a branch from behind woke the girl from her terrified trance, and without turning to look at the cause of the sound, she took a deep breath and launched herself through the layer of bodies.12
If she stopped again, she was next.
A small, dirty hand cautiously crept around a tree trunk, pausing at an age-blackened knothole. The face of a small girl emerged from the darkness of the tree's shadow, peering about suspiciously. Then, suddenly, the face and hand were gone, and the rustling returned.2
A small breeze whispered through the branches, spreading them just enough to allow a little moonlight on the forest floor. Two bare, muddy feet brushed through the dead leaves on the ground.3
The girl, running in confused, disoriented patterns, stopped for breath. As she stood there panting, an eerie bird cry echoed through the tree. Startled, her eyes darted quickly from side to side.4
With a small gasping sound--the sharp intake of breath not yet caught--the girl resumed her run.5
The rustling of her bare feet against the fallen leaves was the only accompaniment to the sound of her heart beating against her chest. Eventually, it was joined by another bird cry; the shriek of its prey was soft in comparison.6
Soon the girl saw that she was approaching a small opening in the trees--a gap. With a sigh of relief, she quickened her pace. Finally, she had found a way out of the woods. Finally, she had an escape.7
But as she burst through the gap, she realized that she was mistaken.8
Her bare feet, still accustomed to the feel of crunching leaves and pine needles, slowly stepped forward; the soft, damp, upturned earth between her toes felt strangely hostile, and the fog that clung to the ground swirled heavily.9
The girl gazed about her, walking with faltering steps. Her eyes wide with horror and disbelief.10
Bodies littered the ground, ghostly white in the light of the moon. The fog embraced their lifeless forms; the shadows gave them deathly silhouettes.11
The snap of a branch from behind woke the girl from her terrified trance, and without turning to look at the cause of the sound, she took a deep breath and launched herself through the layer of bodies.12
If she stopped again, she was next.
Author notes
I wrote this in Creative Writing Club this week, which explains the short length. This is a rather unusual piece for me, since I prefer to write things a bit fluffier, a bit happier. XD But oh well. I like the Dark Side, too.
Comments
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Wow! This... is... good. Your diction in this piece was very compelling. This piece screams of the poetic side of your writing and I would love to see you write more stories like this (though the theme does not have to be as dark).
Just kidding! Write what you feel kid! This is I think some of your best work!
keep it up!
God Bless
thealex

beginning: 5, language: 5, plot: 5, ending: 5, characters: 5.
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I liked this a lot. Mainly because it was dark... but it was also very descriptive and I loved that. Great job!


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very emotonal
Good language, seem like you are trying to practice making your stories more poetic or something



