Stevenson's Rocket --- Bar Bee Queue Variety

I think most would know that Stevenson invented the first steam powered engine on rails. It was called the rocket because of it's shape. Well, I am no rocket scientist, but I made a 'rocket', a bar-B-Q rocket.1

Haggis and I wanted a bar-B-Q. He's the next door neighbor, we share the same driveway. A wily red headed,red bearded scotsman working in PNG. Being a highlander he was short and stocky while I was the provebial broom handle. Haggis not his real name of course, but sounded better for a canny Scot than James W.R_________.2

There were plenty of old fuel drums left in various places after WW2, so we decided to get one of them and make our own Barby.3

Not just any barby, but one that had heat from a wood fire, controlled air flow, easy clean and a chimney to take any smoke away above the heads of those nearby. Sounds good. It was. The first thing was to figure out how to get a 44 gallon drum into a car boot designed for one suitcase. Simple, borrow a small truck. Next, how to access the old WW2 dump where some of the drums still had fuel in them.4

Not a serious problem as Haggis and I both worked for the same Govt Dept. A few queries here and there, interminable waiting for the beaurocracy to function, and we had our piece of paper to gain admittance to an area that was open to everyone anyway. The paper was a safeguard for future reference if needed. Its better to be sure than have some sod nick off with our completed barby on the pretence that we took the drum unlawfully to start with.5

On to the job of construction. We did have a plan, a design, and the drum. Now to con our unknowing employers into donating the use of their paid labour and their equipment to do the work. Ah, the mind of a scotsman is devious. He was a trade teacher, the trade was welding, his workshop had all the reqired gadgets and thingos , plus keen, willing students, to get the job done right now. Well, it took a while, we actually had our first bar-b-q party before we got approval to make the damn thing. So, to avoid complicating things, we made another one for everyone to see.6

The design was complex. First, take one empty 44 gallon drum, mark half way round at each end, draw a line between the marks. on the end with the bungs, measure in four inches and maake another line meeting with the halfway lines you have already. Get an oxy torch and someone who knows how to use it and cut along the lines. You should have a 44 lying in its side, with most of it cut in half. A piece of 10 mm mild steel plate welded on to the section cut in half, weld part of the end piece you cut off to seal up the half circle between steel plate and remaining round end of drum, put some legs on and its a barbie. Minor details can be tailored to suit the person making this contrivance.7

Kafare was Haggis's head boy, sort of leading hand, a real character, been in Jail for murder, inciting to riot and various other white man's criminal offences. Big man, loud voice, sense of humour and as black as coal. Anyway, Haggis said to Kafare;-
" You open this drum and smell. Find out if it had petrol, diesel or whatever in it"8

Kafare unscrewed the two bungs and removed them, took a big whiff and went a funny shade of grey.Haggis raced across from the other side of the workshop and helped him stand up and get his breath back.9

" Petrol" muttered Kafare. Haggis took a far more careful sniff and sure enough petrol fumes were in evidence. Haggis shook the drum, there was a sloshing in the bottom. The damn thing still had petrol in it, twenty five years after WW2 had finished. At Haggis's instructions the drum was rolled outside spilling a trail of petrol on the way. The drum was emptied on the bare earth outside.10

" Leave the drum open for a day or two to let the petrol smell go away" Haggis was adamant about that. The drum was left where it was. Haggis took the now recovered Kafare over to the work bench and took out our plan, our Bar-B-Q plan. They spent an hour or so going over it and working out a plan of action for the next day. [All part of the teaching process. How to read a plan and work from it]11

Next day. Kafare was anxious to please, so he rolled the drum back into the workshop, got the plan from the bench, the oxy torch to cut the drum to the required design and commenced. First he lit the oxy torch and tested to make sure it would have the desired flame to cut the drum, then he put the goggles on,Safety goggles, and started to cut along the lines he had marked out.12

The bloody drum gave a mighty whooooff and jumped off the floor. Flame shot out the two bung holes and everyone scattered.
All except Kafare, he had a few singed hairs but was otherwise unscathed, the flame on the oxytorch was blown out by the rush of air, and that bloody drum was unmarked. They don't make them like that any more. Haggis was livid. All this whoooof happened just as he came in the door to start work. He had told them all about the dangers of cutting into wartime steel drums many many times. So another lecture on safety followed.13

Kafare was hardly listening to the lecture, he wanted to do something special for "Masta". He had remembered to turn off the gas bottles feeding the oxy torch. Just as well for the workshop would have held a lot of gas before it went bang and took the lot of them with it into obscurity.14

It was a bit humdrum after that, the rocket was made with all it's required elements, including legs to stand on and duly delivered to the driveway between Haggis's place and mine. It was there when I got home from work. Suffice it to say that it was a magnificent bar-B-Q and was used as a model for many more. We used the damn thing for about four years and, as we had cemented the legs in place , it's probably still there.