Late December

A cold evening in late December, a celebration of you, though you really don't want it.  You play along, acceptance more than enjoyment, agreeing to dinner out in a fancy restaurant.  In my heart I know your pain, and I silently thank you for being so agreeable.  1

You arrive, resplendent in coat and tie.  I reach to straighten your tie, any excuse to touch you.  2

You smile at the sight of my little black dress, after five, spaghetti straps, but not revealing.  I want you to use your imagination. See my curves, but wonder at what lies beneath the soft fabric.  I can read your mind..satin?   Or lace?  Or both?   And the color....you are wondering at the color of filmy cloth that separates me from the dress.3

The dress that should have long sleeves to be fashionably correct.  I hate convention, and wear what I think you will appreciate...because I want to..  please you..only you....4

You help me with my coat.  We walk to the car, talking in turn, sometimes over each other.  Then quieting out of courtesy, waiting on the other to speak. Laughing then, at our timing.    Facing one another, I see so deeply inside of you, it stops me in my tracks.  No awkwardness, just a need I always have to say what is on my heart, concerning you.    I don't, this time.  I fight that urge to tell you, to let the words spill over  You see it though, you always do.  You sense me...just as I often sense you.  Instinctively knowing how easy it would be to walk back to the door, unlock it...go inside...lose ourselves.5

 Just the right look, a light touch...and we both would.   6

You lean forward, opening the car door, then.  I smell the spicy scent of you,  It fills my head...Leads my thoughts to other directions.  Tempts me, again,  to stop you.. to ask you to turn around, to go back.....But, there are reservations...so we go...We eat....we enjoy.   Soft lighting, good service, excellent food.  The environment, as well, exquisite.  7

Back outside, the sky is clear, as it is in southern winters,  on the coldest of nights.  Stars visible, moon shining brightly, as though to honor you.  The ride back is made in silence, mostly.  You watch the road, and I watch you.  Can't take my eyes away from your face.  You turn to look at me....you read my mind...and press the accelerator a little harder. 8

Once back in the house, all pretense slips away.   I step into you, removing your coat.  While kissing the hollow of your throat....feeling the pulse that beats there, I unbutton your shirt;  you unzip my dress.  You step out of your shoes, as do I... Mirrored actions...done in haste..9

I untuck your shirt, feeling accordian pleated wrinkles at it's waist, while you slide  straps down my arm, with your hand.  I step out of the dress,  toss it on the chair, not caring at how it lands.  Next your tee shirt, lands square on top of my dress.  10

Clothes, imitate life.11