The water was calm
The air smelled of salt
My heart raceed
As I ran down to the shore
Today was the day
I finally could join my bretheren1
But there I sat on my blue blow-up dolphin
Waithing for them to come
I waited for minutes
Those led to hours
Then lead to days
After a month had passed
Me just there waiting2
I'm tearing up at the seams
They promised when they visited
I could join them
More than in just my dreams
But they never came
I moved on....3
But you can still find me out on that beach
In the exact same spot
Whispering on the wind
Telling them to come
But they'll never come
Author notes
Picture Chosen: Ocean Shore
Food: Cookies!
A contest entry
- Picture Prompt!!!! by Eresipel.
200 points, ended November 2, 2008, 5 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Picture Prompts *yay* by EZlats.
400 points, ended November 8, 2008, 14 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - Random pictures, Picture prompt. by Elegant Inspirer.
1000 points, ended November 4, 2008, 7 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest - What ever you can think of... by Celestial Rose.
270 points, ended November 15, 2008, 15 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Um...er....Nice, I guess? I was lost on that one line, though: blue blow-up dolphin? What is that? But good poem, besides that part.
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I was not a fan. Whats with the blow up dolphin? It's not really what I was expecting but I can't really expect much with such an open ended contest. For the most part though I did like the poem. But how could he have moved on if he is still waiting on the beach? I like the last stanza but seperatly from the poem just as a stand alone. I really really liked that stanza.
Thanks for entering.
Elli -
Just to make sure, which prompt did you do? I have a guess but need to make sure.
Good poem
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I chose number four.
I never knew what these guys were called, I must have atleast three and a half dozen of them.
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I liked it, so sad. Poor him, how could anyone just not show up for such a sad guy?
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NOOOOOOOOOO it must be so lonely out there well he better start swimming.
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Ooooh.... I like it! Poor guy, sitting out there all alone.
Anyway, I liked it! Great imagery and i like how you portrayed the sense of abandonment.
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I love water. It represents calmness and beauty in my opinion. I love the poem! ^^
However, I suggest that you capitalize those "I"s. That's one of the most common things to forgot to capitalize. As well as other sentences.
Good job and keep up the good work!
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