Look at that smug bastard, stowed away among my non-consanguine kin, clinging to fringes of the conversation. You can tell by his face that he's listening intently to every single Godforsaken word, but you can tell by the infrequency of his verbal contributions that he really doesn't care.1
What, then? Are you too good for my friends? Too mature? Too refined? Too intelligent? You're probably thinking all three behind that polite smile and hollow laugh, you arrogant prick.2
What gets me isn't the displeasure of our company--I mean, nobody's perfect. No, instead what gets me is how he just sits there, tolerating us, not dropping any hints that he wants to leave--that he wants to go home and write a story or do some homework or jerk off to Plato or whatever the hell else elitist twats like him do with their time. Instead he just sits here and suffers through conversations about which he isn't interested with people he doesn't like, to the backdrop of music he doesn't listen to and a TV show he doesn't watch.3
...4
Despite its efforts, separated from the tree, the blossom is dead.5
Author notes
As most of you have hopefully realized, the last line of this story is written with the structure of a Haiku.
Could the change of style indicate a change of voice?
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Oh yes, I know that kind of person, the pompus ass kind who has done everything, been everywhere and always has one up on you, or so he thinks. Love the haiku at the end.
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"Non-consanguine", that's a hell of a word
But I see your point, you'd have to use ten or twenty words to say the same thing. Anyway, I like this, I think most of us know that asshole (or his twin, anyway). The one who obviously thinks they're better than you, but for some reason hangs around anyway. I don't think I've seen it written about before, though 
Good job and good luck.
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Yeah. "Non-consanguine kin" is way too flowery to really be colloquial, but I couldn't think of anything else that really fit.
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The vocabulary seems incontinuous. A little fancy here, almost forced, a little modern, regular there.
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ooh, nice ending, it's great the way you ended a story in haiku. The style is great. It's a really good write. Live through your words,
Lily
Edited on Apr 01, 5:28 p.m. because ''.
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