Everyone has that summer, the one in which they grew up. Every young man and woman has that vacation that holds the memories of taking the last steps from being a child, to becoming an adult with the strength to handle life as it comes. Sometimes though, the people we experience those summers with don’t grow up quite the same way . . . Sometimes we have to leave them behind in that last summer of dreams. 1
Some people fall in love during that summer, others lose it then. I guess mine was somewhere in between. You see for me love began during the previous school year . . . My best friend. He was everything I ever wanted, he was sweet, handsome, and even though a year younger he was, at the time, very mature. The year held a lot of meaning for us. Our first kiss was Christmas Eve on my front porch, Our first . . . time . . . a week after my birthday. We really thought we knew everything, then the year got hard. His parents turned against us, they felt we were too young to be in love. I remember how he yelled at them that they were wrong, that he’d do anything to prove that he’d love me forever. I guess, when he tried so hard to be grown up, it made me think he actually was ready to. I turned out to be wrong.2
The summer began with promise. I had the most amazing boyfriend ever. I even went to a party on the last day of school . . . And I never went to parties. I still remember snuggling next to the campfire and watching the other kids burn their homework, even the occasional pilfered text book, as some sort of act of final defiance . . . at least until next year. 3
I remember lying in a tent with him later that night, staring into his eyes, and fighting desires that we both knew were wrong. The fight didn’t last very long, I guess the freedom of summer and the emotion got to us. Once again we lost our heads to temptation. It was the last time, I told myself . . . Again. 4
I guess that is where we went wrong. Some how we thought we were “growing up” by making the same mistakes our own parents had made. That was a summer of lying to our parents, and sneaking around. I mean, we loved each other, it wasn’t wrong . . . Was it? 5
What we did, it was stupid! Yet . . . I look back on that summer and all I remember was the heat. Not the sun, but the passion. It was so strong, surely that was love . . . Wasn’t it? 6
There is something that our Hollywood icons don’t tell us. When they push “if it feels good do it,” and “live life to the fullest (meaning sleep around as much as you can)” They neglect to tell you what that can do to a young person’s mind. How it can attach you to that person. Through that summer I felt amazing, I thought I had found what was real. I thought I was safe. Sure, there were a couple of scares, but we were always careful, nothing would go wrong. And nothing did . . . physically. 7
It’s funny, that very thing we thought was bringing us together ended up being the thing that tore us apart. See, when you’re that young and in love, and you give that much away to that other person, you start to depend on them. I grew so afraid of losing him I think that I held on too tightly. I didn’t think about the fact that we were both playing with emotions that were too strong. 8
These are emotions that I’ve learned are only meant to be shared with one person. Sure, I thought he was that person, that’s how I justified it. He thought he was the one too. I neglected to remember one thing; he was a year younger. I watched him, at 16 years old, losing that innocence that I had fallen in love with him for. I mean, he was actually less “innocent” than I was in many ways, but emotionally he had always maintained the purity of a little boy. I guess, that little boy got scared. I can’t blame him. I took what he was willing to give and I made that little boy grow up too fast. 9
The way it all fell apart seems so foolish to me now. I mean, relationships end every day, but usually there is a big fight, or the people realize they were different. We were just too much in love. We started to get uptight about little things. We were both scared, we’d set so much on the future, and hadn’t exactly made the right steps to make it work out. We were in a physical relationship that was over our heads, and an emotional one that was becoming exhausting it was so strong. Me, I wanted to keep fighting, but somewhere that little boy reasserted himself. 10
Somehow the man I loved turned into a boy I hardly knew. He was scared I guess. He ran away emotionally. I spent months chasing him, trying to make him see that it wasn’t a crime to love me. I realized he’d run away inside, not back to that summer, or the winter that we met, he ran away to the summers of his childhood, where he didn’t have to worry about love. He has his fun now, trapped like a boy of twelve. I’m trapped too, trapped in the summer where I tried to grow up too soon, but only by choice. Only because I didn’t want to leave him behind.11
Author notes
Hummm... This is an interesting one. I just was miserable so I needed a vent, and I wanted to get some version of that summer out. I don't know why I just needed to today and this contest provided a good avenue for it. This is personal, some details are a little changed but its the basic idea... I hope people like. God bless all, the moral I would think is obvious...
~Stefani~
A contest entry
- DARKWRITE: Dumpsville by MysticalMelindy.
275 points, ended July 31, 2006, 7 entries
• next story in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Ahh, young love. It hurts so much to watch your love change before your very eyes...or to watch their eyes as you change. My condolences on your breakup my dear
beginning: 3, language: 4, plot: 5, ending: 3, dialog: 3, characters: 5.
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Amazing
This was such a pure write and it explained everything with such ease. I loved it! The words just flowed together, weaving this incredibale, yet sad story...~Merber~beginning: 4, language: 5, plot: 4, ending: 5, dialog: 4, characters: 2.
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Very concise and proffesional
Yes I like this story alot, it's very pleasant to read and flows like infantry and the changing of certain events I feel is always a safe option, well done.
beginning: 4, language: 5, plot: 3, ending: 5, dialog: 4, characters: 5.
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You said you envied story tellers? I see no reason to envy - you are quite talented as a story teller. Of course, the real stories are always the ones we can tell best, but I see a lot of potential in you.
Mechanically I see no problems. Your sentences are correct as is your spelling, your thoughts are coherent and easy to follow, and your paragraphs are good.
Your story is very honest and well told. Very nice work my friend. I hope to see more stories from you. -
Well, I am no parent, but I have thrown much thought into the subject with some of the things that I've gone through. I know that would be a difficult situation, not knowing exactly what to do for a child... what restrictions to place, etc. My mom took the same route as you... It is a hard situation. It is a hard one coming out of it as well, looking back on mistakes, not wanting to see them as mistakes but knowing they were. Then there is the parent issue, I encourage you that if your daughter is open to talking about some of that with you do not be afraid to bring it up. Granted I do not know the situation exactly, however I know that since my mom was aware of a small percentage of the problem that created an accidental rift... She is afraid of hurting me by discussing it, I don't discuss it because there were more problems than she was aware of and I fear to bring them up with her. I usually find myself wishing she could know everything, and if I were still IN the situation I think it would be important for her too. Being out of it, not needing her control and guidance to get out of it now... I fear some of it will simply hurt her. If there are chances to keep a rift from forming there take them... Anyway, I appreciated your comment very much, as you said from your view it is a nice inside look. God bless
~Stefani~ -
This gave me some very valued insight into what I have been watching my daughter go through for the past year. The comparison is very close and hearing it from a personal perspective is very helpful and aids me in understanding her mood swings now that love has ebbed away. That first love is so intense and as we grow older we forget how devastating the loss is. Her 'summer' was last summer and great fun and happiness filled those months. Almost exactly what you describe here seems to have happened to her. As a parent I knew that I could not come between her and that 'first passion' and made sure she had protections of every kind. As long as my rules were respected I did not try to end the relationship. Some may disagree with doing that but I wanted her to be safest. But as you say, that is what caused it to end I believe. Anyway, I fell into the story and you wrote it with passion and grace. I appreciate the insight and inside perspective. A very well written story.
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Well thank you, I'm really glad you liked it.
~Stefani~ -
]cool you should have gotten 2nd place!!!you worked so hard keep up the good work and keep writing!!!
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reminds me of the deana carter song strawberry wine... very sweet and gentle piece about love. great work. much love to you.
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Wow this is really good. I enjoyed it alot. THis is perfect for the contest lol. Well, wow this is so good. I know how it is to be miserable...it says so in your aouthors thingy. Anyway, Great write!
keep writing, Rachal
xoxoxo
P.S. Can you please comment on my Love's Unfair poem. I dont think my last poem Gothic Beauty is that good. Thanx a bunches. Im going to go comment on some more of your work.
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