Children of a Forgotten War (Excerpt)

Note to readers: This chapter is near the middle of the book. If you need the context (Which might be necessary to understand all of the story) then you might read the author's notes below before delving into this chapter.1

U Yong surveyed the two mountains to his front once more. There was definitely activity on both of them. He had stolen behind these all day, but had miraculously gone unnoticed. 2

He looked at the sun. It was beginning to sink low into the western sky. Now, the time was finally upon him to make his decisive move past the point of no return. This was the point for which he had striven for the weeks since his escape from the Chinese army. 3

He sat down for a moment. This was the moment, but how could one make a six year old girl understand the gravity of this situation?4

Soon Hee sat silently, and obediently on the rock, careful to keep her head down below the bush directly in front of her. How did her mother make her understand to hold her silence when the Communist armies overran their village? How had this little girl stayed hidden as her mother instructed her? How had she remained strong, and held her silence even when she saw her father beaten and hanged? How had she remained hidden and quiet as she watched her mother being beaten?  5

Did she understand what was happening when her mother was dragged back into their house? Of course not! Six year old children don’t think of such things! Mercifully, she could not possibly have understood what was done to her mother before she was shot. 6

U Yong studied Soon Hee’s eyes for a moment. She really was a remarkable girl. Maybe … just maybe … she would understand just how dangerous this night would be. If not, she should be able to understand and obey U Yong’s instructions. After all, she was a veteran of war contact now. 7

A veteran at six years of age? How ridiculous that would sound, but then, was any soldier he had ever seen made of as much emotional substance as she? She had held her silence even as she watched the Chinese soldiers make sure she was alone in the world. She never cried out, and never even cried so far as U Yong knew except that one time four nights ago.  8

He knew she was hungry most of the time. He was hungry himself, but there just was not enough food to satisfy them both. He shared with her, but he knew she was not satisfied with the small rations he gave her. Still, she never complained to him. What a remarkable girl! Yes, she could follow his instructions, maybe even understand. If she were a soldier, he would explain their situation fully. He must explain it to her just the same. 9

U Yong crept back to the rock where Soon Hee sat. He knelt in front of her. She turned her full attention to him. He stared into her dirty face. It was one thing to think he should explain, but another to actually find the words to use in that explanation. He reached to her and pulled the dirty rags that served as her outer coat around her again. He pulled the tattered neck scarf up to cover her chin and the bottom of her ears.10

“Soon Hee,” U Yong began. He pointed to the two mountains in front of them. “The men who hurt your mom and daddy are up on those two mountains. They are getting ready to move forward again and hurt more people just like your mom and daddy.”11

Soon Hee continued to look at him silently. She seemed to understand, and her face showed no emotional cracks at the shock of the beginning of his monologue, so he continued.12

“There is a chance that we can get between those two mountains without them seeing us, but we can’t be sure right now if nobody is watching it. You have been so strong! Your mom would be so proud of you for that!”13

Soon Hee smiled. “My mom told me I had to be strong.”14

U Yong smiled at the sight of the dimples that came to Soon Hee’s cheeks. He reached forward and gently ran the backs of his fingers along those beautiful dimples and that dirty face. 15

“I know she did,” U Yong answered. “And you’ve been a very strong girl, just like she told you. And tonight only very strong girls have a chance of making it through that valley. Can you be that strong tonight?”16

“I’m strong enough,” Soon Hee answered. 17

“We have to go between those two mountains where the people are who killed your mom and daddy. Are you scared of that?”18

“I’m not scared.”19

“You’re not scared?”20

“No.”21

“Not even a little?”22

“I’m not scared.”23

“I’m scared, but you’re not?”24

“Well...”25

“Come on...”26

“I am a little bit.”27

U Yong reached for Soon Hee to hug her. She quickly jumped into his embrace. He listened. There were no tears, just a genuine desire from her to be held in his embrace. He turned his face into her hair. He smelled once again the unperfumed smell of hair that had not been washed for weeks. It was a beautiful smell – the smell of life; the smell of the companionship they had shared these last many days; the smell of someone who clung to him for warmth in the night and depended on him despite her rock tough demeanor.28

“Since we’re both scared,” U Yong said. “We need to stay close together tonight.”29

“I’ll stay close to you.”30

“I need to carry our rifle and our shelter, so you’ll have to walk - just like always.”31

“I can walk. I don’t need to be carried.”32

“Even when we get to the scary part?”33

“Babies get carried! I’m not a baby now.”34

U Yong smiled again. “That’s right. I almost forgot. You’re almost a woman, aren’t you.”35

“Yes, and I’m strong, just like my mom told me to be.”36

“I understand,” U Yong said. “So if you’re strong like that, I can tell you what you need to do tonight and you’ll do it, just like you did when your mom told you?”37

“Yes.”38

“Then listen closely. You need to stay close to me. Stay behind me, and walk where I walk. Don’t talk, don’t cough, don’t sneeze, don’t make any noise. When we get past the mountains, I’ll put you in front of me, so I stay closer to the bad people.”39

“I understand.”40

“If something happens to me, and you are behind me, run back where we came from, and don’t look for me. If I don’t come for you, then you need to go back, and find someone who will be your friend like I have been.”41

“I understand.”42

“You can do that?”43

“I can do it.”44

“Then, if you are in front of me, and something happens to me, you need to run ahead until you find someone – don’t wait for me.”45

“I understand.”46

“So if you’re behind me, and they get me, what do you do?”47

“I run back where we came from.”48

“And if you’re ahead of me and I get hurt?”49

“I run ahead and find someone.”50

“Okay, then, but you’re going to need something.”51

“What?”52

U Yong unfastened the top of his pack, reached inside, and pulled out the last portion of dried fish, and the last half of sweet potato and handed it to Soon Hee. 53

“That’s not much food,” he said.  “But if I get hurt, maybe it’ll be enough for you until you find someone.”54

Soon Hee stared at the fish, not sure whether to satisfy her aching stomach, or to tuck it away as she had seen U Yong do with their food. 55

“Put that in your jacket and save it,” U Yong told her. 56

Soon Hee quickly moved some of the shreds of her jacket out of her way, and found the one pocket with no holes beneath them on her left side. 57

“If I get hurt, and you get hungry, after you know you’re safe, you can eat it. Do you understand?”58

“I understand.”59

U Yong turned his gaze from Soon Hee to the sun. It was beginning to disappear behind the mountains. U Yong rose, and took up the Chinese rifle he had taken from the man who guarded him when he was captured. He inspected the chamber of the rifle, and ensured a round was chambered. It was absolutely essential that he be able to fire first, without giving his presence away before he delivered a lethal blow. He knew he could not fight his way through if there was a force of any size there, but perhaps he could save himself from a single sentry, or perhaps give Soon Hee enough time to escape if things went wrong. 60

U Yong stood, but stooped – careful to keep his profile as low as possible while getting ready to move quickly. He looked back at Soon Hee, and pressed his hand against his mouth, signaling her that they must not speak from this point forward. 61

Soon Hee responded by smiling, then pressing her hand against her mouth. 62

With that, U Yong turned toward the valley pass and began stealthily moving forward. Soon Hee stood and followed. U Yong moved, careful to keep his head below the top of any barren brush that may offer the slightest concealment. Soon Hee moved likewise, carefully mimicking U Yong’s manner of keeping his head low. She moved quickly as one would expect from the veteran she had become - always careful to keep a few feet of distance between them. 63

The light of the day began to fade. 64

“Good,” U Yong thought to himself. “About the time I get through the pass in front of that Chinese contingent, they won’t be able to see us and won’t have a clue that we’re there.”65

He glanced back at Soon Hee. Had he done the right thing by bringing her along? But then, if he had just left her where he found her, how long could she have lived before she would have been overcome by the cold or hunger? No, he could not have just left her. At least this way, she had a fighting chance to get to safety in the South. 66

Carefully he crept forward crunching snow between his feet, observing every short shrub and scrubby tree, watching the encampments on the mountains to each side for any sign that anyone was paying attention – anyone cared that an escaped POW dressed in a Chinese uniform crept between them with a tattered little orphan girl. Every rock was a potential ambush point. Every tree possibly concealed a sentry, but as each was checked, no sign of a diligent enemy was found. From tree to tree U Yong dashed. A short distance behind him a little orphan girl dressed in rags mimicked him with short determined dashes.67

It seemed like an eternity as they moved on through the valley. A path of sorts became distinguishable in front of them. 68

U Yong stopped and considered the path. It would be faster, and easier to move on the path – the snow would be packed down and easier to walk through, and the undergrowth would no longer slow his advance, but would the Chinese have it guarded? Would it be worth the risk to move on the path? 69

“Best to be safe, and follow the path,” he thought to himself. “But stay to the side of it a few feet” He knew the path should be something an army would guard if they had any sense at all. He kept a close eye in front to see if anyone was posted. But what if they lay concealed? He had to take the chance - there was no other way.70

He continued along through the thickening scrub brush, fighting more and more the incline to his right, and the deepening snow drifts along the side of the mountain. 71

The peak of the mountains moved slowly past as he continued to creep along. He looked back. Soon Hee continued to move stealthily and skillfully behind him. However; the snow in the brush was very obviously disturbed where they had walked. On either side of their trek, the snow remained undisturbed in the brush and on the lower tree branches, but where they had walked, the snow was brushed down. That made their path visible and more obvious and drew attention to the tracks they left in the snow. There was no two ways about it, it was necessary to make it through tonight – the path they left was too obvious.72

The sun continued setting as the mountains began to move behind them. Surely the Chinese would not be on the south side of the mountain, unless they were advancing that is, but there were no sounds that night of preparation for a push forward – only an eerie silence. In a time when they were so conscious of every noise they made, the silence made this crunch seem like thunder in their ears.73

Maybe the Chinese were awaiting more reinforcements. So far as U Yong could tell, they were few in number compared to the massive waves of humanity he had seen in the battles to the north. Maybe they were not yet at battle strength.  74

U Yong moved on to where he was clearly in front of the mountain.  He stopped, and turned around. He strained his eyes in the dimming light to see Soon Hee, following as stealthily as possible behind him. He motioned for her to come in front of him. 75

Soon Hee quickly dashed in front of U Yong about 20 meters. She stopped, then looked back to him – uncertain now of her next move. He silently motioned for her to continue forward. She turned south again and began moving from bush to bush using the same stealthy walk she had seen U Yong use when she followed him. 76

She looked back once more. U Yong nodded his approval to her, then motioned her forward once more. 77

Soon Hee looked at the rough snow covered terrain ahead of her, then down at the path just a few feet to her left, and a little lower than she presently stood. She walked forward, but crowded the path more and more as she went. 78

U Yong moved to correct her motion, then stopped short. The mountain peak was clearly behind them now. Surely there would be no more danger of Chinese guards in the path. 79

Soon Hee carefully stepped onto the path, then looked back into the twilight.  80

U Yong motioned her forward, then stepped out onto the path himself. His pulse quickened. Adrenaline began to make his legs tingle and his breath quicken. He was almost home free, and with Soon Hee with him! Soon, the nightmare north of the battle lines would be over, and he would be back either to safety, or maybe with his unit again fighting to slow down this invading horde’s advance into his homeland. But fighting was no longer his burning desire. He still wanted to turn the invaders around and move them back out of his homeland, but his heart was longing more and more for the woman who was promised to him. 81

His time with Soon Hee was stirring new desires within him. He wanted to have someone like her look to him for instruction. He wanted someone like her to care for and love. If he could get back, perhaps he would be let to go to see if his betrothed still lived, and perhaps he could become a father. Surely the war wouldn’t last forever. When it was over maybe his homeland could be a place where his children could be happy, and a place where he and his children could once again find beauty. 82

Something creaked behind him. Had he been spotted? The hair on the back of his neck stood straight. His muscles stiffened. He wheeled toward the noise, and fell instantly to the ground, rifle poised to meet whoever moved. 83

He surveyed the terrain in the vanishing light. The snow on the ground made visibility much greater than the last night he had fought before being captured. He could still see quite well for this hour of the evening, but that meant he could also be seen if anyone was in position to look for him.  84

He lay still, straining to control his breath, quickened even more at this start.  85

There were no more sounds. Nothing moved. All seemed to be well. Maybe the wind knocked a bit of ice from a tree, or perhaps just pushed the tree enough to make it creak.  86

A thunderous explosion shattered the night’s peace. 87

U Yong jumped to his knees. That explosion came from behind him! 88

A shrill, agonious scream stood his hair back on end. 89

“Soon Hee!!” he gasped barely audibly. “Oh no! No! Soon Hee!”90

Desperation rose within him. His heart leapt wildly within him. He abandoned all caution, jumped to his feet in the path and ran south toward the scream, rifle remaining in both hands for quick use. 91

Soon Hee’s shriek split the silence again. 92

That was not fear! That was pain! What had he led her into? 93

Soon Hee again screamed out in agony. 94

How long had he laid in that path looking back? Just how far ahead was she? 95

Another scream! 96

U Yong rounded a quick left and stopped short. Soon Hee lay in the path. Low branches on both sides were splintered. His worst fears were confirmed. The path was mined!97

He ran to Soon Hee, fell to his knees, and gathered her in his arms. He surveyed her body. 98

Her left leg was gone just below the knee, or at least the flesh from it was. Her clothes and flesh lay in ribbons for several inches even above the knee. Below the knee, the bone protruded, at first in tact, but then shattered, split, and splintered as it progressed downward. Blood ran from her right leg also, but enough of her ragged clothing still covered her there that her wounds were not readily visible in the dim winter evening’s light.  99

“Oh Mother!” U Yong gasped. “Not you. Me! If someone’s going to get hurt, it’s supposed to be me!”100

Soon Hee continued crying in agony, but her voice was losing the shriek it had with the first few breaths. 101

U Yong quickly reached into his bag, and pulled the string out of the top. He began to tie it around the upper portion of the mutilated left leg. As he moved his arm across Soon Hee’s abdomen, something caught the sleeve of his jacket. He looked closely. She was bleeding from her abdomen also. He grasped at her clothes, and tore it aside enough to see her abdominal wound. 102

A piece of metal, frag perhaps, was stuck into her tummy. 103

“Oh Mother!” U Yong exclaimed in a desperate whisper. “How deep is that, little girl?”104

He took hold of the end, and pulled slightly, just testing its depth to see if it could be removed. Soon Hee’s voice again reached a shriek as he pulled gently at the metal in her tummy.105

Tears began to cloud U Yong’s vision. 106

“Oh! Soon Hee!” He creaked. “That’s deep! That’s bad! That’s bad” 107

He took it in his hand again and thought – should he pull it? He began to realize the seriousness of Soon Hee’s condition. 108

“Even if I could stop the bleeding from your leg,” He whispered,  “what will I have saved you for? So you can die a much more terrible death from your intestines leaking inside you?”109

He looked into her eyes. Her agony was obvious, even in this light. He guessed the pain kept her from hearing his words, or else her crying kept her from hearing it. 110

That perfect, cute little chin began quivering in pain.  Unintelligible sounds were gasped between her sobs.  That mouth that spoke so eloquently was reduced to this!  111

Those eyes! Those beautiful, intelligent eyes! What he saw in them now was not intelligence, but a plea - A plea to U Yong for help, but what help could he offer?  112

He stared into her eyes for a moment, then dropped his head until he held her in a tight embrace, careful to not touch her wounded tummy, but safely hidden from her pleading gaze. Soon Hee reached around him, and found just enough hair on the back of his head to grasp tightly - Very tightly - grasping as one might clench his teeth on a bullet in order to endure a primitive surgery. 113

The pain of his hair being pulled did not matter to U Yong, nor did Soon Hee’s cries in his ear, now just inches from her mouth. Now, all that was important was to be near her - as near as he could get.  He could smell the staleness of her unwashed hair again, but that staleness was now a precious scent from a precious life that was seeming to cling only to him.  114

Was there nothing he could do? He tried to force himself to think clearly. He was a soldier! Surely he was stronger than this, but no, there was nothing he could do, and pulling back to look would mean he would lose this embrace, and he would have to look again into those pleading eyes, pleading for help he could not give; pleading for a life he could not save.  115

Oh! To be able to trade places so she could continue, and he join those he had marched among in the next life. How badly he wanted to trade. 116

Soon Hee’s cry began to lose its strength. Like an infant fighting to stay awake, but losing the battle, now Soon Hee’s cry betrayed her own physical weakness. She too was beginning to lose the battle to stay awake. 117

As her cry weakened more and more, U Yong’s muscles began to tense, more and more - like a mainspring being wound tighter, and tighter, but unable to release its stored energy. 118

Soon Hee’s chin stopped quivering. 119

U Yong’s breath became quicker, and more labored. Forcefully, he drew it in and let it out through clenched teeth. 120

Slowly, Soon Hee’s grip on the hair on the back of his head loosened more and more until her hand, fell limply to the ground. 121

U Yong’s mouth drew tight and wide. His lips grew narrow. His neck and face tensed until his ears roared, and his neck quivered. Ever so slowly, and ever so laboriously, Soon Hee’s chest rose with breath, then just as slowly fell, and did not rise again. 122

From deep within him from the very pit of U Yong’s stomach a convulsion thrust upward. The first was not so strong, but wave after wave of emotion pushed up again and again until his entire body heaved, completely engulfed in the force of feelings bottled up inside of him from as far back as the day of his own mother’s death at the hands of the Japanese occupiers. Everything he had endured, everything he had seen, every friend he watched die was now embodied emotionally in this little orphan girl - perhaps the one he had loved the most. 123

The emotion began to leak through, just a dribble at first as the invisible skin which held his feelings inside began to rupture, but each new, powerful thrust from his gut widened the opening until, like waves, his tears, and sobs broke through and erupted onto a face which had not cried since boyhood. 124

Perhaps every soldier who has ever marched off to war, and has survived any time has reached a place where all he could do was cry. Perhaps every soldier has reached the place where the war is bigger than he ever thought possible, where the pain of his losses is more powerful than the glue that holds him together. Perhaps every soldier has reached the place where he wanted to die rather than live with the scars he now bore. Perhaps every warrior has scars, but the deepest of scars are not the ones that can be seen. The hardest to endure are the scars to the heart gained at the loss of comrades, loved ones, or even the innocent unknowns. The worst of scars are the ones gained at the wounds of those around him - the closer the person or greater the love, the deeper the wound, and perhaps U Yong had never loved anyone as much, or as selflessly as he had loved this little girl whom he found completely alone in the world just a few weeks ago.125

Just hours ago, she was so bright. Now her light had been put out. Just hours ago, she was such a joy to his eyes. Now, he could not even look at her. Just hours ago, she was the only spot of light in his life. Now, his life was darker even than the moonless nights in which he now sat. Total darkness. Why should the sun even come up tomorrow?126

Soon Hee had given him the will to continue as he hoped to be able to give her a better life. Now, what was the point of even continuing south? Now, what would it matter if he was found in the trail by Chinese, or by the U.N. forces? Now what would it matter if he made it back? Now, what would it matter if he died? His purpose for living, the one who gave him the will to continue through the cold and fatigue, the only thing of beauty that remained in his homeland was now forcefully taken away.127

He sat in the middle of the path holding the lifeless body in his arms and wailed. The wails could be heard for a great distance, but none of that mattered now. Now there was no point to remaining hidden. Maybe the soldiers would come, and maybe they would not. Maybe he now hoped they actually would find him.128