White Walls, Plastic Knives

“I’ll make tea,” she said, and left the room.1

Turning to the others, I told them ‘I’d better go with her; sometimes she forgets to boil the water.’2

Walking into the kitchen the white on the walls and floor, ceiling and counters seemed too bright. It was creepy and odd. I hated it with a passion. 3

/Yet the blood smears stood out just a little too much. I made a mental note to tidy up later, after the guests had all left/.4

“I don’t have enough mugs,” said a tiny voice. It came from the girl in front of me, but I didn’t recognize it. Staring at her face, I knew it was my darling sister. I had to smile, knowing that because of what I had done, I was now being haunted. Call it conscience, call it guilt. I call it pathetic and a fucking joke. 5

I put my hand to her face and reassured her she had enough. See, not only was she an obsessive compulsive cleaner, she had a nasty habit of collecting things she never used-like coffee cups, or ‘mugs’ as she liked to say. I went to the cupboard and took out three of them. Not meaning to, I brought the cups down in sudden anger and a little too hard for my liking. 6

/Where’s my control/?7

They broke, and glass shards went all over the counter-top. My sister snapped her head of so fast with eyes so wide I thought she would scream. But like a good little girl, she clapped her hands to her mouth and didn’t let out a single peep. 8

/More of a mess. More of a mess! Blood, glass, and a sister to look after/! 9

What was it with the way people looked with fear in their eyes? I wasn’t sure why, but I got a high from it. Call me crazy, call me psychotic…and I will agree. 10

I took out three different mugs and soon the whistle on the kettle was blowing. My sister poured hot water along with the tea bags, while I swept up the mess. 11

“Tomorrow,” I began, “Is a new day with new things to fix. You know that, don’t you? This isn’t over.”12

She just nodded, and took the tea out to the living room, where our guests awaited us.13

/Not only did my victim haunt me continuously, but she also found a way to live in my sister. It was almost a reminder, a try to make me feel bad. I guess to kill the ghost I will have to kill everything it has its elongated fingers wrapped up in. No matter what, it still felt cold inside. I couldn’t shake the bitter shivers nor the icy chills that coursed their way through my veins. But nothing shocked me anymore/. 14