The moonlight filtering in through entwined branches. The ripples of light just hinting of the lake floor. The calm tranquility of the moment is broken by two bodies breaking the surface and entering the cool crisp midsummer nights water. Just heads and shoulders above the water, the two are just staring at each other. Conveying to each other more than could ever be said by words, ‘I Love You’ is baby talk compared to what they are saying to each other. Small ripples being sent out by the man come to lap at the shores of this Isle of Woman. Gooseflesh transposes her entire body. Her chest just being concealed by the water is starting to breath slightly faster. His pulse is beating a little harder as he paddles his feet to keep afloat. Slowly, perhaps subconciously the two drift together in the starlit evening. Coming together to form one kiss. One kiss that slows time and lasts forever. The memory of this kiss to be seared on their memories. Every kiss either of them ever has will be compared to this, and pale in that comparison. Their lips grinding slowly, tongues just hinting of the speed they are travelling whenever they are visible through a crack in the lips. Locked together like this forever still kicking to stay afloat they spin slowly in the middle of the lake for minutes that seem like hours that seem like seconds. They both break the kiss, slowly taking in a deep breath and savouring the return of oxygen to their bodies, but still not clearing their brains of its hot thoughts. At once, they both start slowly stroking for shore. Both eager for the taste that comes next.1
Author notes
Tell me how accurate you think it is...Me being a virgin i have no clue...anyways thanks for reading it regardless
What did you think? Please comment!
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Well it is erotica. Beginning works. Underwater sex is not only difficult to discribe it is difficult to do.
Nevertheless, to write about sex all is necessary is to get a good sex manual and look closely at the pictures or read lots of sex novels, stories and fantasies.
Not much sex takes place in this, but erotica tends to lend that way.
This line is off a bit, grinding is harsh word:
Their lips grinding slowly, tongues just hinting of the speed they are travelling whenever they are visible through a crack in the lips.
Interesting write. -
ahh.. this was beautiful. spectacular imagery. thank you for proving that virgins can write erotic, someone told me they couldn't and i disagree, but hadn't been able to come up with anything really good on my own to disprove this. anyway this is a lovely story. and i like how you keep the reader hanging at the end. nice work
Edited on Aug 07, 6:26 p.m. because ''. -
This is nice. Again, the language is very good, the situation well-described. You write very well, JPuchyr. I enjoy your stories. The detail draws one into the story, almost as though one is there, watching. Very nicely done. Good job. Very romantic.
I think my favourite line would have to be:
"cool crisp midsummer nights water."
It's very descriptive and I can nearly feel the water flowing beneath my fingertips.
Edited on Aug 07, 12:06 because '--'. -
minutes that seem like hours that seem like seconds....yes, this is the most perfect line I have ever read, or at least in a long time if not...it said everything...
Jaci
Edited on Aug 07, 3:55 because 'bad spelling'. -
This is beautiful, very romantic 'for minutes that seem like hours that seem like seconds' I really like that line *shrugs* maybe its in the context it was used... The descriptions and imagry was so detailed it was more like watching than reading in a way (I hope you get what Im saying lol) I realy like this a lot
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DAMN! This takes my breath away....sorry I can't help you on accuracy, I'm in the same situation you are in! lol! It sounds utterly accurate according to my expectations anyhow. Keep up the good work!
~Epiphany
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Wonderfully Written!
Dear JPunchyr~
This was beautifully written! Such imagery pulled me closer to the shore as I felt like an intruder. Your descriptions were very tantalizing and sensual without being overly dramatic. I'd really enjoy reading much more, as this somehow seems unfinished. Imagination is a powerful thing, and by reading this story, I wonder how this could be taken into ecstasy.--For now, I'll just imagine
A wonderful cliff-hanger...look forward to reading more. 
Always, 
^j^Honesty
"The ever-sought pot-of-gold can be found
by those that believe it is actually there."
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romantic
how romantic! But I couldn't really say how accurate it is either . . . but it is very well-written, great job
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