Silent Hill: Twisted Desire

And in her footsteps, Hell followed. She opened a gate to something nocturnal, dormant and alive. And as the winds howled, picking up speed, everything turned to rust and ash. Blood became her skin and her skin was a disease, contained by a bitter smoke, a fuel of hatred.1

Her hair was of a raven flame. As the fires rose behind her and from her hate, she birthed creatures of pain, creatures of punishment. They did not walk on 2 legs or see with mortal eyes, they only looked on in undeniable pain, twisted and contorted in their features, they only bred anger, they only bred pure hatred2

"Now you will feel my pain, now you will feel my rage." Elizabeth said.3

As the summit of darkness plunged into the depths below, she maintained a phantasmagoric nature, quiet and vengeful. She stared him in the eyes now, and Richard trembled. His black hair blew in his face but could not cover up her face-a face of hatred, a face of anger and pain.4

"All dark things are born from hate." she uttered, speaking to the wind.5

Still she hovered over nothingness and he stood there, frozen between fear and pain. A noise wailed in his head and it wouldn't stop. It got louder, closer...and then there was nothing.6

--7

Falling ash swirled to the ground like makeshift snowflakes. It falled and breathed life upon a dieing man. Richard opened his eyes to a sideway street. There were garbage cans along the pathway of the alley before him and silence. There was nothing but silence. Even the ashes didn't make a sound. They were only quiet, afraid, they were only secretive, assured. 8

--9

"Mom, momma." he cried behind a plexiglass window. A woman with years of grief on her face got up and walked away. She left the raven-haired man to grieve and he cried, he sobbed. She turned around, her gray her falling down her back and then she said one thing before she left, " you disgust me."10

He remembered the pain that shot through. How he never meant for it to happen.11

"We all have to pay for our sins. You are not my son, you are not my child, you are the devil,you are a lie." she had said only moments before, just before he whimpered her title12

like a lost child, in search of something, something, anything that made sense.13

--14

It haunted him everyday, everynight, and whispered in his ear. It was the reason he cut himself, it was the reason for the scars. It was the reason he felt like the whole world stared at him as if they could see, as if they knew what he'd done, that he was a bad person, that he had15

sins, as dark as night, as eternal as hatred.16

She was a 14 year old girl walking home from highschool. And he waited for her. He covered her mouth and put her in his car. He heard her trying to scream in the backseat17

and all the pleas she'd made. It wasn't his fault, it wasn't her fault, it wasn't anyone's fault.18

"Be a good boy. You always make mommy so proud. Mommy loves you"19

Mother is God. That's what he used to believe before she turned on him and took away the only bond he could have ever trusted.20

His father had walked out on her years before and his final words were, "You're sick Lia, you're really fucking sick. Get help." and then he left. Richard held on to that hatred his whole life. He blamed his father for leaving him with a demon, with a woman he barely knew but should have known so well. They are whispers in our mind, the darkest things that come to the surface. They are things that gnaw at us, our dearest regrets. But we all have a side worth knowing, a side we are ashamed of.21

So he climbed into the backseat with that 14 year old girl in the woods and he raped her. He robbed her of her innocence, he watched her bleed. He put every piece of himself and his hatred into her and used her as a filter for his mind. But it didn't work..And even as she lay still and silent with her eyes open only staring up at him, he knew what he'd done would never be right. No matter how many ways he tried to count it or replay it, it could never be right. He was a monster, and she had made him so. His mother. His deepest regret.22

But Silent Hill took this from him and gave it a life; no longer to be secluded and rememberd in memory. It became the walls around him, the life he thought he knew. The life he tried to forget.23

--24

Richard got up off the street now. He shook his head and ash fell from his hair. In search of a destination, a way out,25

his blue eyes scanned the area. 26

There were cars, covered in ash and abandoned. Tires, fully inflated and houses seemed quiet, empty as not one movement stirred in them. There were no lights on and you couldn't see the sky. It was only white, pale and empty but dark and soulless, much like him. Taking steps forward, Richard walked down a block where there was a grocery store and a red symbol on the glass. He felt like he'd seen that symbol before but couldn't remember where. So, without even thinking about it, he pressed his hand to the symbol and it illuminated.27

--28

"A young 14 year old girl, Elizabeth Stewart was found dead and gagged in a gutter today. Police say she'd been laying dead for 12 hours until a young woman with her child passed by. The young child had dropped a toy beside the gutter and had seen the body laying face down. He then rushed to his29

mother who further examined what her son had seen and had discovered Rebecca was dead, and no longer breathing. The Chief of Police is all over the case and has still not found the killer."30

The news reporter said with fake white teeth and straight brown hair.31

And then the screen flickered to an ancient man, with a white beard, dark beady eyes and a white complexion.32

"We're doing all we can to find the sick individual who did this."33

he said in all seriousness.34

Richard remembered turning off the t.v. and walking to the bathroom. No, his past would not escape him this time. Her hands in his pants, his tears running down his face.35

He was only 8 years old. He barely knew anything about the world. He trusted her and she took that from him, took the only innocence he had, the only trust he placed in anyone. She did it often. Often every week, often saying his name over and over againas she did. But, he would try to get out of her grasp, he'd try to leave her bed and run to his room but she was drunk and she was strong and he couldn't get away.36

When she was done, and he was no longer useful to her, she'd let him go and she'd sigh in her bed as she laughed. She wasn't right, she was sick in the head and nothing would ever make her well again.37

--38

Richard came back to reality and fell back on the pavement.39

"Wh..wh...why...why ARE YOU MAKING ME REMEMBER THIS?! WHO ARE YOU!?"40

he said stammering out, shaking in anger and fear.41

--42

"I am who you were, I am who you betrayed, the merciless liar, the dramatic symptom."43

the little boy spoke to him in the reflection of the glass in front of the grocery store. 44

"Who are you?!" he screamed again at a shadow.45

"I am who we all are when we die and who we become when we lie."46

spoke the young child.47

Richard quickly got up in anger and grabbed a nearby brick and tossed it at the window. And then he fell to his knees and sobbed.48

"I didn't do it, it wasn't me, I swear I didn't...oh god, I'm so sorry... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, I didn't even know her...Oh god..." 49

After ten minutes or so, he got up and walked inside the grocery store and stood just beside the glass. There was nothing in the glass now, only a reflection of the ceiling50

and in the reflection, Richard could see red words sprawled out.51

He looked up, quietly and afraid.52

"We are all Liars.We are all Sinners. Go to the gate where the demon53

swallows hate and sinners"54

There was a map on the the bulletin board beside the grocery store door. Richard walked over to it and saw 2 red circles around 2 places on the map.55

"Alchemilla Hospital" and "Staton HighSchool".56

"That's where I have to go..." he whispered to himself as he yanked the map down and stuffed it in his jacket pocket.57

He walked out of the grocery store, half sane and started toward the hospital first.58

--59

The streets were empty as before and with them followed a dark silence; as if they knew something that Richard didn't. His hands were strangely cold so he stuck them in the deep pockets of his black leather jacket. It was strange, the feeling the town gave him and how they stirred up every edge of his dark past, the one he tried so valiantly to forget.60

It seemed that no matter how far he ran or for how long, he didn't get anywhere and all it did, was give him more time to think, about his demons, about things that shouldn't ever have been.61

The fog over the town seemed amplified with each step he took, as if inviting him to an open door, one he couldn't see. Richard didn't know where he'd really end up or if his life would ever even eventually mean something. He only knew the task at hand and so it was, at a quick pace, he rushed over to the dark hospital, trying to find a trace of a past that had haunted him all his years.62

Solemnly he got to the gate with the rusted pale metal sign that read "Alchemilla Hospital" in dark red handwritten letters. It was falling down, wearing away at the edges and the gate squealed as he pushed it open. There was a car inside the lot, a Pale Blue Volvo, seeming as if it'd been there for years, unmoved, unused. The windows were too fogged up so Richard couldn't see if there was anything inside. But, on the back of the car, he did see a note, and on the note were scrawled blood red sentences that read, " Hate is the question. Hate turns love to Ash. Pain is mechanical, needed to heal. Pain and Hatred walk hand in hand. Pain becomes rage."63

He didn't know what it meant, but he stuck the letter in his pocket neatly folded up and walked steadily to the white doors leading to the inside of the hopsital.64